Shattered Glass: The Shattered Series
by NefertitixReigns
Summary: Rabbit's life had been like shattered glass. The only way she survived was because of a crime family whom came to call her own. Her normality didn't last long when she began an impetuous and fervid affair with her foster brother Baz. She felt like the shards started becoming whole again. But what happens when her past finds her and wants to use one of those shards to destroy her?
1. Shattered Glass - Prologue

_Prologue_

 _She cased the place for two days now. Two days was too long to be without food, but she had grown used to it. Why? Because she was homeless and a thief. If anyone asked her, she'd tell them right off the bat that she didn't give a shit. Some people out there would try to make those like her feel like they own the world for their measly two cents they put in the cups and hats every now and again. In Rabbit's opinion, they should be thankful 'bums' like her didn't slit their throats for what's in their wallets._

 _She grew up not caring what people thought of her, adapting an "I don't give a fuck attitude" pretty early on. That was the one thing she learned from her mother. Besides, she had to do what she had to do to stay alive. Some people choose to get jobs. She chose to take shit. It wasn't about right or wrong, it was about survival, which was the only way. Quite frankly, she'd always been like that. She always took what she wanted. Her mom was a pro at that. It was why her dad eventually cheated on her mom—with a man—and divorced her before leaving Rabbit and her older brother and moving away to Alaska. He took care of his children during the marriage, so it wasn't like she needed to steal. But she was a greedy, selfish, narcissistic, abusive whore and still is a greedy, selfish, narcissistic, abusive whore._

 _Rabbit wasn't perceived as a threat to most people, she passed as a bodacious beauty all around. 5"2, long hair that she kept in braids during the summer due to the unbearable heat, boldly original tattoos on display for all to see. Except she kept them covered up with a red hoodie. A black one would be better, especially at night, but the brightness of the red would definitely draw wandering eyes, which could be cause for her getting caught. It was the dauntlessness of it all. Would she get caught? Wouldn't she? The hoodie and shorts were all that she wore, with a cute little spaghetti strapped top underneath. The shorts highlighted her nice, round ass. She had a tiny frame, but the hips and booty went for days. It was that bomb-shit men that drove men crazy. Women, too. Along with the shorts, her ass always came in handy when she hunted a mark. She would smile. Wink. Or she could look bashful. Sweet. It got her a lot of things and got her into a lot of places._

 _For instance, she got close to one of the managers of the Olive Garden up the street. She already robbed the place twice, going unseen and unnoticed. It's why the owner, Big Mike, decided to get security cameras. Guess taking a few bucks was out of the question now. That was okay. The joint she was currently scouting was good enough. She liked the little Mexican restaurant anyway. Keith, the manager, knew her situation so he would give her chips and dip, with a drink sometimes on the house. Still, he wasn't going to expect that it was Rabbit that was about to jack him._

 _However, his 'rant wasn't what she was looking at in that moment. At least not anymore. No, she was looking at the lady with the short blonde hair. Looked to be in her fifties. Maybe she was a mom. Maybe a Grandma. She was sexy. She always came in—wearing simple clothes, yes—but leaving huge ass tips. The waitresses knew that so they always made sure to snatch the cash up before Rabbit could even get to it. Whores._

 _She wanted that money._

 _She. Was going. To. Get. That. Money. That evening, it was going to be hers. She had to think quick. Things were a little different though. She was with those three guys. Rabbit thought they were her grandsons. Maybe sons? She didn't look that old to be having grandchildren at the age those men looked to be. All of them were fucking hot, though._

 _One of them was big and tall. Looked like a surfer boy. The other one with shaggy, long blond hair looked like a surfer boy too, but she would put him maybe as a skater boy. Shit, with how delectable they looked, Rabbit would fuck both of them. But there was that other one, with the short hair. He sat at the head, close to the lady. There was something about him. He had an air of authority. Like he ran shit. What did he run? Rabbit didn't know what he ran, but he had a boss type of personality to him and that made her wet between the legs._

 _They were ready to go because they all stood up. All looked strong. Like they could easily kick the shit out of someone. This time, The Leader plopped a few bills on the table, not the lady._

 _They grabbed their things and left. Pushing and shoving each other. Laughing._

 _That's when she made her move. She would have waited, but she had to get it before their waitress came over._

 _And got it!_

 _Looking down at it, she smirked. Three hundred dollars. 'Shit, maybe I need to become a fucking waitress!' She stuffed the bills into her pocket, along with a few other things that she might need later (forks and knives) and took the rest of a burrito._

 _"HEY! The fuck are you doing?!"_

 _Spinning around, Rabbit's heart stopped. Boo-boom…boo-boom… It was The Leader. She looked at all of them staring at her. Clearing her throat, she swallowed the sudden nervousness that she felt in the pit of her stomach. She hadn't felt that way since her first mark. Standing up straighter, she smirked. They can be pissed all they want. She got what she wanted. There was nothing they could do about it. Lifting the hand that held the burrito, she waved what fingers she could, before chuckling._

 _WHOOSH! Then she took off running._

 _She was a fast runner. Jack rabbit fast. Her mom used to call her that: Jack the Rabbit. She went into high school early, despite her background. thirteen years of age. She left at fifteen, but before she did, she led that school in Track & Field two years in a row. That school wasn't shit until she got there. She made it what it is today_

 _She glanced behind her. The boys were after her, running hard. She laughed out loud because she wasn't even breaking a sweat. "Losers!" She thought they were still hot, though._

 _Turning a corner, she picked up the pace. This path would put her to the trail to the bus station. She had a few dollars that would have gotten her on. She didn't want to break the hundreds just yet._

 _Suddenly, a car came out of nowhere from her left. She saw what was about to happen as if it was in slow motion and she couldn't stop. Not while running that fast. She tried to jump it but miscalculated it and felt the fender hit her in the side. Hard enough to send her flying to the right. She rolled to a stop and wanted to cry so badly. Yeah, she was a tough cookie, but Goddamn…'Shit. I'm dead. Right?'' Patting herself down, Rabbit groaned. "Fuuuck…Fucking asshole!"_

 _The woman got out of the car, while the boys caught up with them. Taking her time, she stalked up slowly; standing with one hip cocked and her arms folded beneath her breasts. Oddly, she smirked down at the injured young Rabbit._

 _"You little thief!" Sk8er Boi yelled. Bending down, he started ripping at Rabbit's clothes, trying to find the money. "Where is it?! Huh! Where is it?!"_

 _"I don't know what you're talking about!" She tried to stop his hands, but he was too strong and too fast. So...she scratched his face like a fucking cat would. That hurt him a smidge, so she gave him a punch. He could kick her ass easily, but she wasn't going to go down without a fight. She never did._

 _"BITCH!" He charged at Rabbit, but was stopped by The Leader, while Surfer Boy laughed._

 _"Look," The Leader calmly said. "we don't want any trouble. Alright, sweetheart? Now, give us the money and we can give you a ride home."_

 _Rabbit made a face. Home. Home(bold italics)? There was no such fucking thing. It made her jealous of them even more. She didn't even know she felt like that at first._

 _"How about this," the woman said. She had that smirk still plastered on her face. She was about to say something, but didn't get the chance._

 _A quick warning siren sounded off and a police officer walked up, with his flashlight shining in their faces. Why did they do that? That was so fucking annoying. It's not even that dark outside yet. He didn't need that shit._

 _"Excuse me, ma'am." He was talking to Rabbit. "Are these people bothering you?" He reached out his hand to help her up, but she smacked it away._

 _She looked at them all, her eyes landing on The Leader. After a few seemingly long moments, she shook her head and then looked back at the cop. "No, sir. I fell. They were just helping me." The taller one did just that. He helped Rabbit up and stood her on her feet. She winced and it took everything inside of her to not yell. It felt like her rib was bruised or something. Shit, it hurt!_

 _"You sure you're not hurt?" The cop asked. He didn't look very convinced._

 _"No problem here, officer." The tall one said._

 _"I'm not talking to you, Sasquatch." The cop seethed. "I know who you are. All of you." He looked at the family and then back down to Rabbit._

 _She shook her head again and chuckled. "Yeah, we were goofing off and I fell. It hurt but I'm fine. Old injury. I ran track at MiraCosta High." She chuckled._

 _"No kidding! Go Spartans! I went there, too! Of course, that was a long time ago. Track, huh? That's nice. I played a little soccer myself. Well, if you're not hurt and…these people aren't bothering you, then I guess I have to take your word for it."_

 _Rabbit smiled one of her sweet smiles. She had a ton of them, too. Sometimes, she didn't even have to steal or use her ass to get what she wanted. She bit her lip and looked down. Bashful. It was time to get rid of the fucker. This was none of his business. Sure, she could have used him to get away, but that would have been too easy and she didn't do easy. "Well, gotta go. It's getting dark. Gotta get back...h-home." Shit. There she goes, stuttering when she mentioned home. Her eyes found the lady's. Her brow went up. Did she know?_

 _"Yeah! Of course! You need a ride?" The cop asked._

 _"She has a ride." The woman piped in. She put her hand on the Rabbit's shoulder and rubbed it._

 _It caused Rabbit to bite down on her bottom lip. The gesture was caring and...nurturing. Like her dad used to be…_

 _"Alright, well, you have a good night. Be safe and watch out for…undesirables." He looked at the lady and her sons, saluted up a goodbye and smile, before getting in his car and leaving._

 _Rabbit stepped away from the lady. They didn't turn her in. That was nice. She didn't say anything about them, either. Okay, so that was...also nice. Sighing, she rolled her eyes. Digging in her back pocket, she pulled out the hundreds. "Here," she muttered. "You want the burrito too?"_

 _"Keep it." The woman said. "Consider the money a loan." That smirk was back. "One day, you'll pay me back. Let's drop ya' off. Where do ya' live?"_

 _Rabbit swallowed hard. Her eyes glanced at the short haired one. His eyes narrowed, while he watched her. Looking away and then down to the ground, she shrugged. Could it be? Was she uncomfortable? No one ever made her feel such a way. "Everywhere." She said after a few beats._

 _"So, nowhere."_

 _Yep. She already knew what the deal was. Sighing, Rabbit looked down at the hand the woman held out. "I guess you can say that."_

 _"I'm Janine. You can call me Smurf. These are my sons. Craig. Deran and this here...the one you've been staring at...is Baz. What's your name?"_

 _Rabbit blinked and swallowed hard. Shit, was it that obvious? She couldn't help but stare at the guy. He was…there was something about him…She nodded, but stayed quiet. She didn't tell them her name. They could use it against her. She wanted to look down. The lady…Smurf…had that look that could run blood cold. That never happened to her, either. It was Smurf's lopsided smirk that seemed almost...warm._

 _"Tell you what. You don't tell me your name. Keep the hundreds and we can go our separate ways. You can at least get a room and some food for the night. If you do tell me your name, then you can stay with me for a few days until you get your shit together. Plus, you can still keep the hundreds."_

 _Rabbit's eyes flew to Smurf's. Stay with them for a few days?! That was fucking crazy! They could be cannibals that ate people and had some kind of big ass chainsaw carrying dude—with half a face rotting off—in the basement ready to peel her skin off and wear it._

 _Except it was that smirk that made Rabbit feel...like she could trust Smurf. Why the fuck was that? She looked at the one she called Craig. He kind of smiled. Deran didn't. He just stared at her and shrugged. Then she looked at Baz. He stared at her, hard. Stared straight into her soul. Her panties were soaked through and through and her knees were weak._

 _"You gotta name, sweetheart?" He asked. There was that 'sweetheart' thing again. She heard men call her that before, but for some reason, it was mouthwateringly sexy coming from him. If she told him her name, that meant she would go home with them. She looked down and shrugged. Should she tell? It was part of her act. No one really knew who she was. For all they knew, she had no name._

 _She looked at Baz again and sighed. "Rabbit. My name is Rabbit."_

 _Deran's face broke out in a grin. "What the fuck? Rabbit? Did your mom see a rabbit or something and decided to name ya' that? She must've seen a lot of rabbits, huh?"_

 _Rabbit gave a sarcastic laugh. "Ya' mama should'a named ya 'Dick'." Rolling her eyes, she walked towards the car, ready to get in and get this over with._

 _Craig laughed, bending over slightly. "Get it? She's saying your mom's seen a lot of dicks. Ha!"_

 _"Smurf's your mother too, asswipe," Deran seethed._

 _"Still funny tho'." He roughed up Deran's hair, while the two of them wrestled each other on their way to the car._

 _"I like her." Smurf said, looking up at Baz. "So do you, huh? She wasn't the only one staring..."_


	2. Shattered Glass - Chapter One

**Three Years Later**

" **Rabbit?** **"**

Lowering my copy of _Moby Dick_ , I looked over the rim of the book and got up from my spot on the couch. Hopping up on the counter, I plopped my butt right on top. **"What'** **s up?** **"**

" **What flavor cupcakes do ya' want, baby?"** Smurf grinned.

I returned the smirk before I grinned widely back at her. I had grown to love her lopsided grins. In her eyes, I saw what a mother would show to her child. Before her, I hadn't seen that look in a long time. She had three boys: Pope, Craig, and Deran. Baz, however wasn't hers, just like me, but that didn't mean a damn thing. And Pope…well, he was gone and I missed him a lot. Three years is too damn long for my brother to be in jail. During the first few months I stayed with this family, he was the one I grew closest to in a hot minute. He got locked up and it put a damper on our relationship, but his jail stint surely didn't break it. It was during this time I got close to Baz.

They never made me feel like I wasn't a part of the family. In Smurf's eyes, I was her daughter. To the boys, I was their sister. Didn't matter that I wasn't white. I was bright enough to look it, but one could tell I was black. They didn't care about that shit. I was their family and they took care of me as such, even after I attempted to steal from them that night. We actually laugh about that shit now.

" **Ummm…red velvet cupcakes. But…I want cream cheese frosting. Why do you even ask shit like this?"** I raised my brow. "You already know what I'm going to say."

" **Good question** **."** she said, flatly. **"Everyone knows you'd sell any one of us for red velvet anything."**

" **As long as I gots ma' cream cheese frosting."** We made our cupcakes and I put them in the oven. I was about to suggest I help with dinner that she had already started, but Craig came in and picked me up over his shoulder.

" **Geeeeet ready, everybody! It's Wabbit Season, baby!"**

" **It's duck season,"** Smurf playfully spat.

" **More like Godzilla season. Jesus, Craig, did ya' grow three inches since last night?"** I yelped and screamed for him to put him down, laughing in the process **. "Can you, like, not make me vomit?"** I slapped at his back and pinched his butt. I felt like the chick from _King Kong_ going up the Empire State Building while being held in the palm of his hand.

Smurf's phone rang. **"** **Hello?** **"** We heard the one sided conversation and quieted down a little when Smurf shushed us... **"J who? Josh? What's it been baby? Ten—no, it's been eleven years. How are you?"** After a few moments, her face went white, then it went blank **"Josh…listen to me..."**

Craig put me down and we both listened. Well, I did, more than Craig. He grabbed two beers from the fridge and beckoned for me to join him. I nodded, but held up a finger indicating that I was gonna be a minute. I wanted to listen to who Smurf was talking to. Josh. I had heard of him. He was Julia's kid, I look on her face said something was wrong. I was too nosy to go outside with Craig now **. "Ma? Is everything alright?"** I asked as Craig handed me a beer.

She held up a finger like I did to Craig. I nodded, opening my beer. Craig pinched my side and I laughed, of course because I always did, and he left and went back outside.

" **Oh Josh, sweetheart. Why don't you just go and pack up your things."** Smurf said.

A few minutes later and after a bit more talking, she hung up the phone.

" **Ma? What's wrong?"**

She turned and looked at me. Her hand reached out and cupped my face. Leaning in, she kissed my lips. **"Watch the cupcakes, will ya', baby? I'll put dinner on when I get back. But watch the cupcakes. I'll leave a note for the boys, just in case you forget."**

" **Let the boys watch' em. I wanna come!"**

 **AK AK AK AK AK**

Thin legs walked up the steps. The purple heels clicking the whole way. When those heels topped the steps, it revealed Smurf in a simple pair of black jeans, t-shirt, and short jean jacket and me with a black body suit, short shorts, and flip flops; my goddess dreads piled on top of my head. At the top, waited a teenage boy with a sack and a trash bag full of his things. The both of us stared at him. I looked over at Smurf and then back to the kid. Familiar strangers. That's how they looked at each other. As if they were familiar strangers. Even Ray Charles could see that shit.

Smurf was the first to talk. **"That all you got?"**

The kid looked down, before nodding and looking back at us. **"Yeah. My bike is downstairs."**

Smurf nodded. **"C'mere. Give me a hug."** She held her arms out. He awkwardly walked to her. Slowly. Smurf held him close and kissed his neck **. "I'm so sorry, baby."** She continued with the loving words, before she disappeared into the apartment, probably to make sure he cleared what he needed.

" **Hi."** Josh fumbled with his fingers. He looked at me, but then looked right back down to the ground.

Chuckling and rolling my eyes, I walked up to Josh and stood right in front of him. **"Hey, J."**

" **How d-do you know my grandma?"**

" **Ya Grandma is my mom."** I saw the surprised look he gave me, but he tried to quickly mask it. Too late, buddy. **"Adopted mom. Like Baz."**

He nodded in understanding. **"What's ya' name?"**

" **Rabbit.** **"**

" **Oh. Okay. Nice to meet you,** **Aunt Rabbit.** **"**

I lifted my brow. **"Aunt? Ew."** Laughing, I nudged him with a hand. **"Don't ever do that again in your life."**

" **Yo.** **"**

The voice caught our attention.

" **Julia up there?"**

Grunting, Jstood up and answered with a simple, **"** **No.** **"**

" **Ya mom owes me money. Ninety bucks. What I gave her was just a taste. And it wasn't no handout. I need my money. Trust me. I'll get it someway."** He got in J's face, trying to be intimidating.

I admired the way J stood there. So maybe he wasn't a pussy. Kind of thought he was at first, but maybe he's just quiet. The dealer went through J's pockets.

" **Uh, the fuck you lookin' for, homie?"**

" **Shut up, bitch!"** The drug dealer roughed up Josh, going through his pockets, as Josh tried to stop him, but the guy got a few dollars and quarters from him. Um, okay…the fuck? Really? He made a stupid gesture with his fingers and then left, telling Josh that he was coming back for his money or Julia was going to be in a shitload of trouble. While he left, Smurf came down the stairs. " **Who was that?"** She looked at the kid walking away.

Josh shrugged and shook his head. Lying, he said, **"Nobody."**

Smurf nodded, taking that bullshit answer and stared after the guy that left. **"Hm."** She looked over at me and raised a brow.

" **Literately."** I said.

 **AK AK AK AK AK**

She pulled up to our house in her black Dodge Ram, parking it and turning off the engine. **"Why don't ya get your stuff out of the truck, hm?"**

Of course, J did as he was told. As he walked up the drive way, all the 'toys' and cars didn't go unnoticed.

While inside, the smoke alarm was blaring. **"Goddamn it!"** Smurf hissed. **"I was just gone for an hour!"** She headed straight for the kitchen **. "Sonovabitch! An hour! A fucking hour!"**

J looked throughout the house or at least what he could see from where he was walking. **"** **Jesus fucking Christ** **."** he muttered. Still, he followed me and Smurf to the kitchen. She took the cupcakes out of the oven, slamming the door and throwing the pan in the sink

J saw the wads of cash on the table and furrowed his brows. Smurf was pissed. She took her jacket off, snatched the note off the fridge, and stalked outside.

" **Ooooh-whoa-whoa-wo-whoaaaa, tickey tackey toe toeeee. They are in trouble!"** I laughed, kicking my flip flops off and marched right on outside with her, J's hand in my own. Her anger could be felt in the next town over. Her heels clicked the whole way to the backyard. She was skinny, but she was fearless and intimidating. Anyone could see that.

Craig did a flip into the pool. He came up and let out a loud whoop. **"Did ya' see that,** **Ma?!** **"**

" **Fuck your flip! My cupcakes are ruined! Can't you do one simple thing?"** Her eyes found me, who was currently hugging Baz from behind, as if I had been there the whole time. **"This is why I told you to stay home!"**

Wincing, I let Baz go, who grabbed for my arms, but was too slow. **"Shit, I know. Sorry. I just—"**

" **Stop,** " Smurf held up a hand. **"I've heard enough."** Her eyes went straight to Baz, as her other two sons got out of the pool, shirts off, dripping wet.

Baz shrugged. **"You told us to come over. Not do the cooking."**

" **That's what the note was for! Can any of you read?! You knew I left a note to remind you guys! One simple thing! I asked you to do one simple fucking thing!"**

The three boys stood in a line, wet and rowdy looking. I stood between Deran and Baz, of course. Every chance I got, I was next to Baz. He calmed me for some reason. Now that Pope wasn't around, Baz and I were the closest. I looked down. I was the one who wanted the fucking cupcakes and I ruined them, even though I wasn't here. With Smurf's glare, I knew she was not happy with me. She was going to get over it, but that didn't mean I wanted to disappoint her. I hated disappointing any of my family.

Smurf smirked and walked to Josh. **"J? You remember your uncles** **, hm?** **"**

I nudged Deran and Baz. They, along with Craig, kind of gave J a half ass greeting. They did that when it was people they were suspicious of or didn't know.

" **Hey, how ya doin'** **?** **"** J mumbled, his lips barely moving. His shoulders slumping inward. He looked everywhere but us. Looked like his favorite place was the ground.

Baz was the first to speak up. **"Sorry about your mom, man."**

" **Uh, thanks, me too,"** J said.

Craig nodded. **"Yeah. Been forever."** He sniffed, water in his nose. **"Barely recognized ya'."**

" **Yeah, he was like five the last time we saw him,"** Deran said. **"Remember when you and Julia were high and were really goin' at it?"** He looked at Craig.

I raised a brow. What the fuck? Sighing, I shook my head. Julia was Smurf's daughter. She had been gone for years. No one spoke about her. Not even a phone call. I guess I replaced her in some sort of way, but none of that mattered. She was this kid's mom and she just passed away from an overdose. Their sister! All they can talk about is when she got high?

" **Wait, she threw something…uh…coleslaw!"** Craig laughed.

Baz spoke up, putting his foot down. That was the leader I grew to love so much. **"Guys! Shut up."** He gave them a look to shut the fuck up. Looking at his nephew J, he gave a sympathetic smile. **"You want a beer or something?"**

" **Uh, no thanks,"** J said.

There was that awkward silence. No one knew what to say. Especially about Julia and to her kid. I was going to say something, but Smurf spoke up.

" **Dinner will be ready in an hour,"** She announced. **"It's a good thing I didn't leave the roast in the oven."** She turned on her heels to J. **"How about I whip up another batch of cupcakes? Rabbit can help. She makes a mean cupcake. What flavor would ya' like, baby? Chocolate or vanilla?"** She looked over at J, saying that last part.

I stepped forward. **"Please say red velvet."** I winked. **"They are moist and mmm."** I licked my lips. My arms around his shoulders, as I stood in front of him. **"The icing is fucking creamy as hell."** I giggled. **"Wait to ya' get to the center."**

" **Um…I uh…creamy? I mean…uh, I'm not really hungry,"** J said.

Letting my arms drop, I stepped back and nodded with a smile. He was rigid and standoffish. He hadn't seen his grandma or uncles in ages, and he had no clue who I was. I wasn't upset at his demeanor. We all were really close. Closer than close. He would have to get used to our dynamic.

" **Uh, ya wanna real drink then?"** Baz asked, his eyes on me, before they moved to J. **"We got uh, tequila…"**

" **Um, I'm really tired,"** J said.

Smurf looked at him. **"Of course ya are baby."** She rubbed his shoulder. **"Ya go on in and take a nap. I'll save ya a plate. Rabbit? Show 'im his room, baby."**

Nodding, I sidestepped one of the pool chairs and walked passed my nephew. **"** **Come on.** **"** I looked back at him. **"How old are you?"** I asked, walking him to his room. Actually…it was Pope's old room, but it didn't matter right now. He was in jail.

" **Seventeen."**

I turned and raised a brow. My hands on my shapely hips. **"** **Well** **, lookie there. I'm not the youngest in the house anymore."** I laughed and walked up to him. Leaning in close, I sniffed his neck, before kissing it. **"I love fresh meat."** Laughing, I moved away. **"I know, I'm weird. Anyway, this place can be empty sometimes. The guys got their own places. Sometimes, they crash here for whatever reason. It keeps Smurf happy, though."** I played with one of my braids, looking at the kid. Sharp features. Tanned skin. Beautiful eyes and those lips. I could just kiss him though. We all did that to each other. Kissed on the mouth. It was platonic…ish. **"Keeps me happy, too. I miss my brothers, no matter how much they piss me off."**

Flipping the braid back, I continued to show him around the room. To say the house was kind of spacious was a half truth, some of the rooms weren't. Then again, a lot of the older homes were like that. **"Closet for your shit."** I slid open the door. He peeped in. Then I moved to the linen closet. **"** **We** **'ll get ya' some linens for your bed. Covers and pillows, too. All that shit's in here already, but we can get ya' fresh shit. Bathroom is down that way, but you can cut through to it outside over there through the sliding door we came in. You'll still have your privacy. Don't worry."** Smiling, I walked up to him and stared at him. He was cute. Sexy, even. In a quiet way. He stared right back at me. Unmoving. To be honest, I like that shit.

Craig and Baz interrupted us, coming in with a flat screen. Deran followed behind.

" **We** **'re gonna find some screws and shit and put this up,"** Baz said, his eyes switching to me. He gave me that look, which told me to move over and I did. They sat the TV down.

The three of them stood there, with Baz in the middle. **"Are those your only shoes?"** He asked.

J looked down and nodded. **"Yeah."**

Craig shook his head. **"Dude, ya' can't wear those. I can't be seen with ya wearing those."**

" **Yeah,"** Baz agreed. **"Gotta get some new kicks, man."**

" **Get some Nike's, like Dunks or something. Not the orange ones. Those are gay."** Craig nodded. Gay? I laughed and shook my head and the seriousness that spread all over his face. **"Like really gay."**

" **Really gay."** Baz mumbled.

" **Really gay."** Craig reiterated.

Reaching into his pocket, Baz pulled out a couple of hundreds and handed them to J. It was nothing to us, but the kid looked a little excited, shocked, and even confused. I thought it was a sweet gesture though. Here was someone they haven't seen in years and they were giving him money for shoes and stuff. I loved that shit. Deran, however, didn't. It was written all over his face. He had a big problem and its name was point blank:

Trust.

J thanked Baz and Craig. Deran, too. The three of them started walking out of the room. I wrapped my arms around J's neck. There wasn't much room between us. I knew he could feel the heat from me because he looked everywhere, but my eyes. Yep. He really was shy. It was kind of cute. Sexy, even. I was so used to a bunch of Alpha males. It was nice to see a kid who was actually shy.

" **Welcome home, J. I know ya' going through a lotta shit. Probably still in shock. Lost my mom, too. At first, it was hard just because it's my mom. I was living in a shit world. Slowly, everything got back to normal."** I smiled softly. **"If ya' ever need to talk…I'm right across the way. Literally."** I pointed across the way. **"This room used to be an adjoining room. Actually it is, but a few things were adjusted."** Standing on the tips of my toes, I leaned in closer, my lips touching his ears. **"Your clothing closet…push the clothes to the side and you'll see a doorknob. Turn it and slide the door to the right. Boom. My room."** Kissing his cheek, I pulled away. **"Get some sleep, nephew. See ya' tonight."** Winking at him, I walked out and closed the door. The boys had already left the room, leaving me to be the last one.

Of course, I ran straight into Baz in the hallway. Raising a brow, I tilted my head back so that I could see his face. **"Can I help you?"**

Baz stood quiet for a moment, looking between me and the closed door to J's room. **"Go to the garage."**

I rolled my eyes defiantly. **"I'm going to the kitchen. I owe Smurf another batch of cupcakes. Dude, ya' know how she gets."** Baz grabbed my arm and stopped me from moving. Pulling me to him. With one look, he had me nervous like a little girl. Something most people didn't know about him…Craig was the tallest. He was the muscle. Deran was the erratic one. Pope was the…'special' one. But Baz? He may have had a boyish face, with the grin and the laugh lines to match. But when he got angry, you didn't fuck with him. Swallowing hard, I looked down and then back into his dark blue eyes. **"W-What?"**

" **We need to talk…"**

" **We** **'re talking right here, right now."** I frowned, running my fingers through his hair. Hey, I knew the game. Brothers or no brothers, they were still men and all men were the same. I licked my bottom lip and pouted them full time. **"What did I do wrong, Barry?"** I asked in a small, childlike voice. I did that to make the man (and some women) feel bigger than what they were; making them think they had control, when it was I who had the control in the situation.

" **Garage. Now, Jack."**


	3. Shattered Glass - Chapter Two

Jack.

Nobody called me Jack except for Baz. Sometimes, he'd say it in a caring and affectionate way. Other times, I knew I was in deep shit.

Instead of going to the kitchen, I went to the garage and waited for him. I started biting my thumb nail, which I hated. It was a nasty habit that I've had since I was little that showed its ugly face every now and then. The others finally joined us. I didn't know they were going to be at this little meeting. Maybe I'm not in trouble after all. Standing, I crossed my arms and cocked a hip to the side. Ma and Baz leaned on the car, while Craig played with his dogs Bruno and Pup-Pup. Deran, however, was pacing.

" **Have you lost your mind?!"** Deran yelled.

Smurf ignored him. **"Don't bring your dogs here if you can't clean up after them. Almost stepped in a pile a shit by the pool."** Her attention was back on her youngest boy.

" **I mean,"** Deran continued. **"it's insane. What makes you think we can trust this kid? Family is based on trust! We can't trust him!"**

I furrowed my eyes. **"What makes you think we can't? I'd trust him over you any day."** I ruffed at his hair. He slapped my hand away. **"Geez, I was fucking joking."**

" **No joking, Jack."** Baz said, leaning against the car with his arms folded over his chest. Clearly, he was not for the conversation. **"This is a serious situation and if you can't be serious then you can take your pretty little ass back inside and bake cupcakes."**

I gritted my teeth. My eyes shooting to him. I wanted to fucking slap him.

 _I got ya' pretty little ass, mutha' fucka'._

There he goes again treating me like a child when Craig and Deran were the biggest, immature fucks out of us all. I almost said something, but Deran interrupted, still on his rant.

" **I mean, who knows what Julia put into his head?!"**

" **She was too high to put anything into his head!"** Smurf leaned in and said. **"Geez, I'd be surprised if she knew her own name towards the end or that Josh was her son."**

" **A-And if you are wrong? Then what? Huh? WHAT?!"** He held out his arms. **"I guess a decade or two in Folsom ain't a bad thing, huh?"**

" **Stop being so over-fucking-dramatic!"** I rolled my eyes and plopped down on one of the work benches.

" **Shit!"** Craig pulled his hand back. One of the dogs bit his fingers. Playing of course, but I'm sure it hurt. **"Rabbit's right, we are being overdramatic, but at the same time, we shouldn't take any big risks. We need to at least test him out. See where his loyalties lay."**

I sighed. Baz did the same thing, lowering his head and resting it in his hand, before looking back up. Clearly, clearly, he was tired of them talking.

Craig wasn't taking that shit. **"You're just gonna stand there? Huh?!"**

" **C'mon guys. Calm down."** I said, taking my braids out of my high bun and let the flourish down and around my back.

Deran looked at me. **"Bonnie! If something happens and that kid rats on us, we're all going out! You might come away clean, but then you'll be out here alone! Without us! I don't know about you, but I don't fucking want my little sister having to fend for herself!"**

I made a face of annoyance. I could get caught just as much as them. I wasn't squeaky clean. Besides, I've been on runs with them so how would I get away with anything?. **"I can take care of myself, asshole! Remember, I did just fine eighteen years before you!"**

" **You were a fucking thief! And you stole my burrito!"**

" **AND YOU AREN'T A FUCKING THIEF, DERAN?!"** I got into his face. Fuck all if I was gonna back down. I don't take shit from nobody. " **WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?!"** I felt Baz's hands on me, but I pushed them off. I didn't want him touching me anyway. He scolded me in front of everyone, like I was a child. Fuck him. Misogynistic prick.

" **Fuck you! Shut the fuck up."** Deran got in my face.

" **You shut the fuck up!"** I yelled back.

" **How about we all just shut the fuck up?"** Craig rolled his eyes.

" **HEY!"** Baz picked me up easily and placed me by the door. **"Inside. Now!"** He pointed.

My mouth dropped. **"Why do I have to go inside?! Deran's the one—"**

" **Now, Jack!"**

Turning, my braids swishing wildly around me, I stomped inside and slammed the door as hard as I could. **"Fuck all of you!"**

 **AK AK AK AK AK**

 **BAZ**

Sighing, I turned and leaned back against the car. Looking down at my mother, my face was stone cold just like hers. I wasn't for this shit, but I would support her in whatever she came up with. I just wanted to try one more time to talk herself out of this potentially dangerous situation. **"Look, it's really not a good time to have him around,"** I said, as calmly as I could at the moment.

Smurf shrugged. **"Take him out tomorrow and suss him out."**

Craig laughed. **"What? Just take him to I-Hop and ask him if he's gonna screw us?"**

Smurf raised a brow. **"If that's all you can think of."** she said flippant.

" **Yeah, well, if he ain't wearing a wire already,"** Deran said even more flippantly, the response being the stares of the others. **"What? He's a part of it all now?"**

Craig continued. **"We don't know if this—"**

" **SHUT** UP **!"** Smurf snapped. **"All of you!"** She moved to Deran, stood right in front of him. **"Now what's the matter, baby boy? Huh? You think someone's gonna come in and take the attention away from you?"** Her voice was soft and cooing, then it changed. **"You're not the youngest anyway. Rabbit is. You let her in about as fast as virgin pussy comes."** She turned to Craig. **"Suss! Him! Out! Are you that thick headed to do the shit?! Do as I say!"** She spun around to me. **"You wanna be a leader? Then make a goddamn decision! Don't be a pussy and play both sides! The kid is in until I say he isn't. And the next one who says a word will not get a cut in on the next job. Not one cent. TEST ME."** She looked at all her boys before she started to walk away. **"And clean that dog shit up off my deck!"**

 **AK AK AK AK AK**

 **RABBIT**

The next morning, I sat on the edge of J's bed, watching him sleep. He slept in one spot. Didn't turn over. A small part of me wanted to blow in his ear to see if he was still alive, but he eventually woke up and was startled by me.

I giggled and bit my lip. **"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare ya' with my weirdness."**

He gave me a look. He probably thought I was lame. That would change very soon. Not everybody in this family was okay with him, but I was. I think he's a kid who knows how to keep his mouth shut. He had to have seen Julia do a ton of shit I'm sure, and I bet he didn't say one single fucking word.

" **W-What are you doing in here?"**

I shrugged. **"Watching you sleep. Actually, I came in to wake ya' up for breakfast, but you just looked so peaceful. Like ya' haven't had sleep like that in a long time. I didn't wanna mess that up, ya' know?"** Leaning down, I ran my fingers through his hair. He was still a little unsure of me, but I was determined to show him I wasn't the bad guy. A braid slid past my shoulder and hung down between us. He was still so shy. So timid. Then again, it's only been a day. **"Ya' hungry?"**

" **No."** He sat up, pressing himself against the headboard, wiping at his eyes.

I stared at him. **"Ya' didn't eat last night. Ya' not hungry right now. J…"** My hand reached out and rubbed his thigh. **"I know you're hurting. I know you're in pain, but ya' gotta eat. For me? At least have some coffee."** I gave my lopsided smile. The one I inherited from Smurf _somehow_. I nodded. It was only a matter of time before I could get him to open up. He was going to need an ally in this family. A friend. **"C'mon."** I stood up and went to his closet. **"While you were sleeping last night, I went and got ya' some clothes. T-shirts and jeans and underwear and shit. I hope everything fits. You look like you're close to Deran's size or somewhere around it.** **Today, we can go to the mall and get ya' some nicer shit."** Opening his closet, I pulled out a few things and laid them on his bed. **"Take off your clothes."**

" **What?"** He was getting ready to stand up, but paused at that.

" **Take off your clothes."** I walked to him, dressed in nothing but my undies and robe. **"Don't be shy, J. Just take your clothes off so that I can wash them. They stink. You sweated in them. I can see the stains."** He just stood there and looked at me like I had lost my mind. **"Alright, I'll leave so ya' can have ya' privacy. Word of advice. There's not privacy in this house. None, whatsoever. So get used to it. Put your dirty clothes on the floor. I'll come and get them and your sheets later."** Walking to him, I kissed his lips. Of course, he didn't kiss back. When I pulled back, my robe fell open, but I quickly closed it up. He wasn't used to me yet. None of us. He will soon enough. Smiling, I closed the door and left him with what little privacy he was going to have.

I walked into the kitchen and kissed everyone. Well, everyone except Baz. I was still mad at him from last night.

Deran, who was talking about the next job with Baz noticed and smirked. **"Aw, no kiss for your big brother?"**

" **Craig is asleep,"** I said, my back to them. Smurf used her mixer to make smoothies. It was loud as shit and anything else that was said had to be screamed. J finally came out of his room and I smiled. **"Good morning! Again…"** I smirked and drank from the cup of coffee I had fixed for myself. The only reason I smirked was because I knew Baz was eying me and I wanted to keep him guessing that that 'again' and smirk meant.

" **Morning, baby!"** Smurf smiled. **"Are ya' hungry?"**

" **Uh…just coffee."**

She nodded. **"Got some over there**." She cocked her head towards me.

I moved to the side so that he could see the pot. While he fixed himself a cup, I nudged him with my hip. **"Wearing ya' new clothes, hm. Ya' smell good too. Guess ya' found the cologne I got ya'. Oh and those Axe Body Sprays—"**

" **What did I say?! WHAT DID I SAY?!"** Craig beat his hand on the counter top upstairs, which looked down into the kitchen. He walked down the steps and then came around. Of course he was naked as shit. Dick swinging and all. He grabbed the mixer from Smurf. More like snatched it from her and unplugged it. **"What did I say?! Don't fucking wake me up! I'm gonna…I'm gonna do it!"**

" **Smash it,"** Deran said, unimpressed.

" **Yeah, smash it, Craig,"** I said in the same tone. We all knew he wasn't going to do shit. This happened every other morning.

" **You don't think I'm gonna do it?!"** He looked in the cabinets. **"Where's the hammer?!"**

" **Why would we keep the hammer where the plates are?"** I asked.

" **Can't ya' smash it on the floor?"** Deran piped in.

" **I'm gonna do it!"** Craig yelled.

" **No you're not!"** Smurf walked up to him. **"You bought that for me!"**

" **What?! No I didn't!"**

" **Yes, you did."** she said soothingly. **"You forgot to give me something for my birthday, so I bought the mixer and pretended you bought it for me. I even wrapped it up and everything. I love it, baby. It's the best present you've given me. Honestly."** She kissed his lips.

Craig sighed, before putting it down on the counter. I looked at my mom. Man. She was a fucking pro. I loved it. Laughing, I pulled on J's shirt. " **C'mon."** With our cups of coffee we left the room, with Baz calling after me. I ignored him. I didn't feel like even looking at him. I opened the door to J's room and walked us inside. **"Sorry for all that. It's just like another morning. I told you…there's no privacy. And no bashfulness. You see Craig isn't."**

J smiled. I saw it. He actually smiled. Opening his closet, he looked at the clothes and shrugged and nodded.

" **I know. You like them."** I laughed.

When he closed the closet door, we both jumped back at who was standing there. I blinked and swallowed hard. My heart in my stomach and slowly falling to my feet.

" **P-Pope."**

" **Who are you?"** He stared at J.

" **Pope, this is—"**

" **I wasn't talking to you, Rabbit."** He didn't even look at me. His sights were set on J. Eyes dark. Menacing, yet unknowing. One never knew what was going on inside his head. **"Who. Are. You?"**


	4. Shattered Glass - Chapter Three

" **J? Rabbit? Are you two coming for—"** Smurf stopped in her tracks and looked at Pope with wide eyes.

Pope turned around and gave a timid smile to his mother. **"These two, uh, ruined my surprise for you."**

She immediately held her arms out for him because if she hadn't, there would have been shit. I watched her carefully. She grinned at him, but when he hugged her, her smile dropped and she looked at me. I shook my head quickly and shrugged, letting her know that I did not know he was getting out. Judging by her face, she didn't know, either.

Pope.

I missed him, sure. He had a few screws missing, yet he was probably the most capable of the family. He knew this and knew we all thought he was crazy, which was why he was angry all the time.

I can't not love him. He was the most loyal and it showed in his prison sentence. It was Baz who was supposed to have been in prison. Not Pope. No one really talks about that because it was a fuck up on Baz's part and for that, Pope will always resent him.

If one asked me who I would have missed more between the two, I wouldn't be able to answer the question. I have a special bond with both of them. After he hugged Mom, he pulled me into the warmest hug I've had in a while. I rested my head on his shoulder and stood there in his arms. Taking in his strength, his scent, Pope himself in my presence after so long. **"I've missed you, Andy."** I said softly.

" **You have no idea how much I've missed you."** He pulled back and looked at me. **"Three years and you're a woman now. You look different."**

I shrugged a shoulder and bit down on my lip. **"Different, how? I mean, that's a good different right? It's not like you haven't seen me."**

He just stared and didn't say anything. Didn't do anything but shake his head. His eyes raised to mine and then I saw that smile. The one he had only for me. One filled with a warmth that he didn't let the others know he had that side of him. **"You look gorgeous."**

Squealing, I jumped in his arms and laughed. **"You ass! I thought you were going to say I looked like a cow or something!"** I turned around for him. **"Like my braids?"** I did a little model pose. Then licked my finger and touched my ass with a hissing sound effect. Smurf laughed and J just kind of stood there, watching the dynamic between us for sure and not knowing what the hell to think.

" **Love 'em….Medusa."** He blocked my slap and smiled again, but when he looked at J, that smile faded quickly. **"Again. Who the fuck are you?"**

 **AK AK AK AK AK**

We all sat in the living room, surrounding Pope, who was in the arms of Smurf. Craig was on the floor, doing blow of course. I understood his reasons, but lately, it was as if he became reliant on the shit. He assured me countless times that he wasn't hooked, but Stevie fucking Wonder could see pass his bullshit.

" **So, you're Julia's kid. Josh."** Pope said, staring at J.

I had him in my arms. I wanted to make him as comfortable as possible. After all, he was family. He was more of a family to them than Baz and me.

" **Yeah,"** J said softly.

Silence.

" **You look like her."** Pope muttered.

He was the last to know about Julia. I know her death hit him hard, but he would never let us see him cry, nor break. With this family, death came all the time. Quickly and relentlessly. We were used to losing those we loved so when it happened, we had a tendency to close up. Shut down. Pretend like the shit doesn't hurt us. Unfortunately for me, I will never know Julia. That was fucked up for me because she would always be the sister I always wanted to know, but never got the chance to.

" **We should have a party."** Deran said. He sat on top of the couch; feet set firmly on the cushions. **"C'mon. Our brother's back. We need this shit."**

" **Yeah,"** I said. **"that's exactly what we need. Another party."** We were _always_ having parties. I wasn't complaining, though. **"I need a reason to break out my new bathing suit."**

Deran raised a brow. **"If you can call them that. They cover your nips and clit. That's about it. Shit is annoying.** "

I smirked. **"Then stop staring so hard, asshole."** Standing, I grabbed my glass and looked down at J. **"Want me to top ya'?"** He stared at me like I had grown three heads. **"Your drink—get ya' mind outta the gutter."** I laughed. **"Ya' want another drink?"** If we were out in public, anyone could tell he stood out from the rest of us. I don't know why that bothered me, but it did. I wanted him to loosen up. I was going to make it my mission to make sure he became one of us. Family. He may have had just his mom all these years, but he had us now. My brothers didn't trust him, but I did. As far as Smurf went, she was on the fence, I could tell she wanted to trust him. If she didn't, he wouldn't be living with us. I grabbed his glass and Pope's empty beer bottle.

It only took me a few moments to return with drinks for pretty much everyone. Except one person. Deran noticed. **"Aren't ya' gonna get Baz something to drink?"**

I looked at Deran. He had that slick little smirk on his face. I knew what it was for and so did he. He knew I was still pissed with how he spoke to me. How he treated me. I couldn't stand for people to do shit like that, especially men. **"Barry's a big boy. He can get shit himself."** I looked over at Craig, who was doing yet another line. I kicked him hard. **"Jesus Christ, dumb ass! Take a fucking breather with that shit!"** I looked at Smurf. **"You don't see that shit?"**

" **He's a big boy."** Baz said, throwing my words back into my face.

I shot him a look. " **Way bigger than you in every aspect,"** I said through clenched teeth. _Don't fuck with me, asshole_. That's what I should've said, but I kept quiet. He didn't deserve any more of my attention. I didn't even know why I was giving him a hard time. All of us argued constantly, but we loved each other. Our spats were nothing new, but for some reason I couldn't let this one go.

 **AK AK AK AK AK**

The party was the shit, of course. Just a bunch of close friends, drinks, and music. Oh, and drugs. Duh. Deran and Craig made sure of that.

I was in the kitchen, helping Smurf with the refreshments. Baz and Pope were in charge of grilling burgers and hot dogs for everyone. Simple menu, really. It's what Pope wanted. A simple, old fashioned American barbecue. The music was loud and obnoxious. So were the guys and girls. No one gave a shit. No one gave a fuck. The only thing that mattered was that there was fun to be had for however long Pope wanted the party to carry on. Who knows how long that would be? Sometimes, he had his good days where he wanted to be around people for hours on end. Other days, it would be minutes, maybe just seconds. That was the thing with Pope. One never knew what one would get with him. It was what I found so endearing about him. He kept you guessing. Kept you on your toes. One could never get complacent with him. He always changed things up.

" **Be honest with me, Rabbit."** Smurf said. **"You knew Andrew'd be coming home today."**

I sighed and gave a mock growl. **"Ma', seriously? Why ya' keep asking me that shit? I told ya'. No, I did not know! I don't think anybody knew and honestly, I think Pope wanted it that way."**

Smurf nodded, satisfied with that answer. **"It's just…he's closer to you out of all of us. He used to tell me everything. Now? Hardly tells me anything anymore."**

" **The guy has spent three years in jail. I think he had a lotta shit on his mind other than talkin' to his mommy about his feelings."** I snorted and threw a cucumber slice at her. We headed towards the door with trays of food, but I stopped and turned to her. **"Especially when he wasn't even supposed to be the one locked up. Hey…if there's something I need to tell ya', I'll tell ya', okay? But right now, I think he's good."** I gave her a smile and she leaned in and kissed me.

It took us no time to find places for the food and our asses in some chairs, relaxing. Well, Smurf relaxed and had a cig. I found my ass in the water. "Yaaaaas," I moaned, after taking a hard dive from the diving board. I dipped my whole body in and out a few times. I didn't stay in long though. I climbed up the diving board, again where Craig and J were. Baz was at the bottom with Cath, his girlfriend and my little niecy-poo, Lena. Deran was by the grill with Pope. Talking shit, no doubt.

" **Hey J!"** I slapped his shoulder. **"Wake the fuck up. Whattiya' daydreamin' about? Jump in!"**

Craig clapped. **"Hell yeah! Take a fucking chance, bro!"**

J looked at the both of us, as we taunted us. Everyone chimed in, calling out his name. "J…J…J…J…J…"

I could tell he wanted to, but something was holding him back. It hadn't been the first time I noticed that 'something', too. It was there loud as shit, yet quiet and invisible. Come on Josh. Take a chance on us.

Eight words.

There were plenty of times I wanted to say those eight words to him.

Finally, I got tired of it. Instead of saying the words, I 'showed' the words. Taking a couple steps back. I charged at him, taking the both of us off the board and into the water. When we came back up, all we saw were people cheering for us. It was all we heard, too.

I looked over at J. I had never seen him that happy since he'd gotten here. The sight of his smile was intoxicating. Leaning over, I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. It was official, I was going to become addicted to his smile, which was going to make me try even harder to get him to do it.

The rest of the party went by like a quick breeze. It ended too quickly for me. Night came fast and soon, it was past midnight. There were a few stragglers, who would eventually find their way home. Smurf, Cath, and I did most of the cleaning. The rest would have to be done in a few hours when day light broke and we had some sleep.

Cath left with Lena and Baz assured her he'd be home in a little while. Craig crashed with two girls in his room. Deran had his weed and disappeared. Probably went to the beach or to his own place. Pope was still a little ticked that Smurf and Baz put him up at one of the motels close by. It was a nice little suite though, but I understood his need to be under the same roof as the rest of us. He hadn't been with us in three years and it could have been more than that. So, why they didn't let him stay in the house was beyond me.

The lights were dim where I was in the kitchen and I had already sent Smurf to bed. I was going to my own in a little while, but there was one stubborn pot that wouldn't get clean and it was pissing me off.

I finally gave up because my fingers were raw and I was literately falling asleep in the damn dish water. Sighing, I put the pot in the other side of the sink with a little bit of soapy water in it still to hopefully loosen up that annoying spot. I wiped down the counters with a few Lysol wipes. I had one more half of a counter to go and then I would be done.

I went to move, when two long and tanned, muscular arms boxed me in. I stiffened a great deal, trying to remind myself that I was safe. I knew who it was and he knew I had a problem with people being behind me the way he was right now. **"Baz, please…"** I begged softly.

" **No, Bonnie. Not until you talk to me."**

I gritted my teeth and took in a deep breath. I was safe. I reminded myself that, but I yelled at him inside my head. I yelled for him to back the fuck up. **"Barry…"**

He turned me around until I was facing him. He put his finger beneath my chin and made me look into his cobalt blue eyes. **"I don't like it when you are mad at me. Then you ignore me. You know how much I hate that."**

" **Ya' know how much I hate when ya' yell at me and treat me like a child in front of everyone."** It seemed like nothing I should be so upset about, but my mom did it all the time. It was her goal in life to try and remind me that she was the adult, which meant she was the boss and I was nothing. Nothing, but a child. An annoyance to her, even though I didn't ask to be fucking born.

Baz nodded at me, as if he understood **"Okay, you're right. I'm sorry. I've just…been a little outta my head lately. Cath is giving me shit again. Smurf wants to see Lena. Cath doesn't want her to and I'm stuck right in the fucking middle."**

I nodded, completely understanding. Cath was such bitch sometimes. Yeah, I get it. She doesn't want her kid exposed to some of the shit that has happened around the house, but it wasn't like we were going to put her nose up to a mirror filled with lines of blow. We would cut off our fingers before we let anything happen to that little girl, but Cath didn't give a shit. We love Lena to death. It was just a shame Cath controlled when we got to see Lena. **"Sorry she's doin' that Barry."**

He shook his head. **"Don't do that to me. Don't call me Barry. You only do that when you're completely pissed at me. I'm sorry, okay? I won't do that shit again."**

Biting my lip, I gave him a nod. Being this close to him…he always made me feel like a little, bity girl. And safe. Like nothing could hurt me. But there was still one thing… **"Don't come up behind me like that. Ya' know I don't like that, Baz."**

He tilted his head, stepping in towards me, leaning against me and making me lean against the counter. **"Tell me."**

My eyes blinked and my mouth fell open. **"I…"** I shook my head vehemently. **"Ya' know I can't do that!"**

" **He's not here, Jack!"** Baz hissed. **"Even if he was, you know he would have to get past me to get to you. You know that!"** He was trying to keep his voice down, not wanting to wake the others. "Tell me."

I wanted to tell him. All Baz knew was that the 'he' was someone close to me and that he hurt me. Baz and I had this conversation numerous times, but I could never get to the part where it hurt me the most. I was too scared. Too scared that I would blink and 'he' would be standing in front of me. That me living with the Codys was all just a dream and I was back in Louisiana with 'him'. My shoulders shook as I started to dry sob. That was when I cried, but no tears actually shed. I allowed myself to get upset about the shit but what I didn't allow myself to do was cry. I would never shed another fucking tear over that monster.

I felt Baz's arms around my entire body. I was much smaller than he was so it was no big feat. His lips kissed my shoulder, then my neck. I shuddered. My neck was my spot. You know…THE SPOT. Baz knew that and often he would kiss me there to excite me. This time, I knew it was to comfort me. To reach me in a place where I didn't allow many people to reach me and that was to my heart. He pulled back, but only so that he could kiss my lips. Then his mouth was back on my neck again. **"I won't let him hurt you,"** he whispered. **"I promise. Is that why you've been so angry at me lately? It's like our fights last longer and our arguments are getting pettier."**

It was like he could read me. As if I was a book and the pages were my soul, that he could read those words easily. Even I didn't know why I had been so short with him lately, but he knew. Somehow, he did. I doubt that was the only reason. There was something else there. I just couldn't put my finger on it.

I held him just as tight as he was holding me. It felt good and I felt myself relax more and more. I sighed into his chest. **"This feels good. I needed this."**

" **You sure it's not J you're needing?"**

I bit my lip and furrowed my brows. **"Jealousy is so ugly on you."**

" **Sorry."** he muttered. **"Maybe I am jealous. Hated it when you give your attention away sometimes. Especially when you're mad at me."**

I shuddered. His breath on my neck was seriously making me weak in the knees. What I was about to ask him was selfish of me. I knew he needed to get home to Cath and Lena. He told her when she walked out with my sleeping niecey-poo that he would be home soon. But Cath knew the deal. Shit changed all the time when it came to this family. One minute my brothers could be going to their own places. The next minute, they were staying with Smurf. **"Stay with me tonight."** I whispered, looking into those eyes.

" **You don't even have to ask."** he whispered back. Pulling away, but holding my hand, he turned out the remainder of the lights, keeping the small one on above the stove. We passed through the rest of the kitchen and through the living room. I stopped, which caused Baz to stop. Pope was outside. Staring up at the sky, at the moon. Still as the fucking Christ the Redeemer statue in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.

" **Shit!"** Baz and I said out loud together.


	5. Shattered Glass - Chapter Four

Morning came too soon.

Of course it did. I had just gone to sleep, like, two seconds before it was time to get up. That's how it always went in my opinion.

Groaning, I stretched my body and let out a little squeal at the end, before relaxing. It was quiet, except for the soft roaring of my small portable fan. I had a ceiling fan, which was also on, but I always—always, always, always—slept with a box fan of sorts. Even in the winter. I'd have the heater on, plus my little fan. The noise from it was what helped me sleep. I couldn't stand the silence. It was deafening to my ears if I'm to be honest.

I would have probably fallen back to sleep when I felt a strong arm wrap around my waist. Smiling, I turned all the way over and was met with a pair of familiar blue eyes. They were warm, laced with an unleashed anger that sometimes frightened the shit out of me.

" **Morning."** I mumbled.

" **Morning."**

Good God, I loved Baz's voice in the mornings. Raspy and gravelly. Sexy and masculine. It was moments like this where I found myself jealous of Cath. I ain't gonna lie. Kinda hate the bitch….if I'm to be honest, again. She really didn't know what kind of man she had in Baz, while I loved everything about him. His strengths, his weaknesses. And let's face it…he's fucking hot.

He had a brain, too. Not like one would think, though. See, Baz was smart, but street smart so to speak. To me, that was better than being book smart. Anyone could crack open a book, memorize its contents and claim to know it all. It took a special kind of person to understand the game of life and win every time, three seconds before the buzzer. Baz was like that. He was a winner to me, and he was loyal as fuck. That shit didn't come easy anymore.

Before I met the Cody's, I lived the first part of my life with a lying, manipulative, vindictive bitch. Ginelle—or "Mom" as she so desperately wanted me to call her—was her name. How could such a ugly, hate-filled person have such a pretty name? It was a part of my life's story with "Ginelle, the Wicked Bitch of the East". I'd have said West. But please, let's face it. She couldn't touch Elpheba with a ten foot pole because she was a trick bitch. The only good thing she gave me was my nickname. She constantly saw me as competition and hated me. However, when it was convenient with her, she used my 'beauty' for her gain. It was how I learned to twist and turn people to get whatever I wanted. Especially from men.

After I met Smurf, it took a great deal of coaxing from her and the boys to make me believe that she was nothing like Ginelle. Okay…maybe she was a little bit like Ginelle as far as the sleeping with different men part, but Deran told me the situation after a night of him heavy drinking.

Didn't matter. I had grown to trust her and accept her as a mother figure for obvious reasons—something I never thought would happen of course because of Ginelle. But, let me stop talking about my mom. She's not in the picture anymore so why should I continue to bring her up? How does that bitch still get me to think about her when she's nothing more than a pile of maggot shit six feet deep?

What really amazed me was how quickly I took to Baz. He never really crossed that line with me, other than touching and a bit of caressing. Maybe a tiny bit of kissing. We flirt like mad crazy. Even Cath noticed, which was probably why she couldn't stand me most of the time. Hey, it wasn't my fault her boyfriend liked how my _ass_ looked in my shorts. Maybe she should grow one, then she'd find out just how much of an ass man Baz really was.

" **Knock-knock,"** Baz tapped on my head.

I blinked. How did I forget he was lying next to me? **"What?"**

He chuckled. **"You were heavy in your mind there. Thought I lost you."**

" **You could never lose me."** Fuck, I'm such a sap.

" **What were you thinking about?"** He asked.

' _About how much I hate your fucking Old Lady_ '. I bit my lip. I was always honest; sometimes to a fault. I knew he respected that about me so why try to make something up? **"How** _ **she**_ **doesn't know what she has in you. I'm gonna get rid of her. Make her disappear and pull out a bunny in her place."**

He bit down on his lip and tried to hold in a laugh. "Oh yeah? How are ya' gonna do that?"

Sitting up on my elbow, I looked at his squarely. "I know you think I don't have the ability to hurt someone, but that's where you're wrong. See, what I have are a very particular **set of skills** ; **skills** I have acquired over a very long life. **Skills** that make me a nightmare for people like your baby mama. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it."

I took in a deep breath, about to say something he already knew. Here it goes… **"And…what it would feel like to have you between my legs."**

We were quiet. I swear I heard a canary break wind in San Fran. It was just that quiet. He didn't say anything for a long time or at least it felt like it was a long time. Shit, why won't he say something?

" **You know why that can't happen, Jack."** he said softly.

Okay, why did he have to say _that_ something? Letting out a sigh, I nodded. **"Yeah. We're family. I know."**

He sighed to himself. _Was my answer wrong_? **"No, it's because I love you too much to do that to you."**

Uh-huh. There it was. That bullshit again. The 'you're too good for me' speech that I hated so much. Yep, I heard it once before from a guy I thought I loved, so I knew it was coming. **"Just forget about it, Barry**." I turned away.

He stopped me in place. **"Stop. Don't do that. We're not done talking. Don't walk away from me. You know I hate that."** He waited until I acknowledged him before he continued speaking. Sometime through the night, I had taken my shorts off and was just in my bikini bottoms. He put his fingers between my legs and pressed them against the seat of my bottoms right over my clit. I hissed and arched towards him so fast that I didn't have time to breathe. Want and need jolted through me, sending goosebumps all over my body. **"See? Sensitive to my touch."**

My eyes nearly blinked out of my head, as I bit down on my lip. He was right. I was sensitive to his touch. That was something I kept to myself. Not because I was embarrassed, but because I learned from an early age that there were perverted fuckers out there that would tear shit at the seams to fuck a virgin. **"How did you know?"** I whispered.

" **I can touch you anywhere and you shiver. You deserve a guy who's gonna be good to you, Jack."**

" **You can be go—"**

" **Someone smart. Someone who went to college and has a good, legit job. Someone who will take care of you. What you have between your legs is a gift."**

" **Pussy is pussy,"** I said, clearly frustrated. It was like he wasn't comprehending shit. I would do anything for this dude. I _have_ done anything for him. Could the same be said for Cath? No. Cath was all about Cath. We all knew that.

He shook his head. **"I meant your virginity. It's important. Sacred and all that other shit."**

Oh, how romantic. How thoughtful. I couldn't look at him anymore. He basically told me he didn't want shit to do with me, but with nice words. It was a punch to my gut and a slap in the face. **"Fine. I get it."**

" **No, you don't."**

" **Yeah, I do,"** I snapped. **"I ain't stupid, Barry! You ain't gotta tell me more than once that ya' ain't interested. I. Get. It!**

I tried to turn my back to get up again, but he slammed me right back down on the bed, pinning me between his body and the mattress. I would be lying if I said I wasn't turned on. That unleashed anger I was talking about was beginning to steep like hot tea. Smurf said he was going to snap one of these days. **"Walk away from me again and I'll put you over my knee and spank you."** The look in his eyes told me he was serious. Dead-fucking-serious. **"You think I don't wanna fuck you? You think I don't stare at your ass? Your tits? You think I don't wonder just how tight you'd be wrapped around my dick? Don't give me that look! You know I watch you. Otherwise, you wouldn't walk around in those fucking shorts all the fucking time, waving your goods in my face. You…you deserve better. Way better than me. I'm tryin' to tell you that, but you're too fucking stubborn to get it! I'm a way better big brother than I am a boyfriend. A lover. I care about you too much to hurt you."**

" **That's not true! You don't give yourself enough credit, Baz. You're loyal and—"**

" **Stop, stop, stop,"** he groaned the words out, shaking his head.

" **No, you stop!"** I didn't want to hear what he was saying anymore, even if he _was_ right. It just wasn't fair. **"Just one time, Baz."** I raised my hands to his shoulders and laid them there; squeezing them. Feeling his muscles beneath my fingers. **"That's all I'm asking. For you to look at me the way you do Cath. For you to touch me like you touch her."**

He let out a frustrated chuckle. **"That's funny. You know what she tells me all the time?"** I shook my head. **"She tells me, 'just once I'd like for you to look at me the way you look at Bonnie."**

That shocked the shit out of me. I mean, maybe deep down inside I expected it, but to actually hear it? So she _did_ hate me. **"Really?"**

He nodded, grinning widely as if that shit pleased him. The wrinkles at the corners of his eyes becoming evident. I loved those wrinkles, and that grin. It made him look like an overgrown thirteen year old. **"I mean, I know it's fucked up when ya' look at it but…"**

" **I'll take it as a compliment."** I said softly. I hated Cath. I said it all the time. Out in the open when Baz wan't around and to myself and her pussy had to be made of gold for guys to be falling all over her. She wasn't ugly, but in my opinion, she wasn't that cute neither. Plus, I have never seen a flat assed Mexican. That shit don't make a lick of sense to me. It just ain't natural.

But was what Baz said true? She knew her man was looking at me and deep down she wanted to be me. Am I wrong here? Am I being overly arrogant? Because I feel like I am. Then again, the truth can sometimes sound like arrogance. "I still wish you'd be my first." Leaning in, I kissed his mouth. **"You'd love my pussy. You'd be addicted to it. I'd let you have it whenever you want it."**

" **Jesus, Jack,"** he shook his head. **"Look—"**

"— **You wouldn't even have to ask! You can—"**

" **Stop. Alright? You're killing me here. I'm trying to do the right thing."**

I clenched my teeth. **"Oh. So…you can fuck Julia, but you can't fuck me, right? I guess I gotta fuck every Tom, Dick, Joe-Bob, Billy-Bob, and Harry like she did to get your attention, huh?"**

I think that did it. I think my mouth went too far again because he rolled over me and got out of bed and started dressing.

" **Baz—"**

" **I can't love you like that, Bonnie."** He said harshly through clenched teeth and I winced. He called me by my real name. He only called me by that once before and he was royally pissed then like he was now. **"I love Cath. I love my family. No offense, but I'm not gonna destroy that for inexperienced pussy."**

Ouch. He had no clue what that did to me. Or maybe my expression told it all because he was about to say something—no doubt to save his ass—when I turned my back on him and rolled out of bed. **"Like I said, I get it."** Snatching my robe from my closet, I put it on and walked towards my bathroom. I paused just inside the doorway **. "And you ain't gotta ever worry about me asking you for no dick again. I'll just have to find someone else who will make this inexperienced pussy experienced. I don't beg men to fuck me. Men beg me, in case you haven't noticed. And when Cath gets tired of Smurf and what you really do for a living, you're gonna need someone, but my inexperienced pussy won't be lookin' for your shriveled up dick."** I slammed the door shut. I was done talking. I didn't want to see his stupid fucking face anymore. _He chose Cath over me? Fuck him. And fuck her too and her flat ass._

* * *

I showered and got dressed. It was the second time today because after that bullshit argument with Baz, I went to the beach for a long ass swim. I really didn't wanna see or talk to him, but I knew, somehow I was going to have to suck that shit up. Business before Feelings, I was taught. I felt stupid and like a random slut. Why he was so adamant at keeping me at bay now was beyond me. Didn't give a shit anymore anyway. I was hella embarrassed and realized just how much time I wasted. _I could have any guy I want, right? Why did I want Baz?_

Smurf was in the kitchen, wrist deep in meatloaf. **"Hey, baby."**

" **Hey, Ma."** I kissed her lips. I could have screamed when I saw Cath walk into the kitchen. She was here? Ugh! Her face and flat ass were the last things I wanted to see.

The door slid open and in walked Pope. Baz got a beer out of the fridge and one for Pope, who he handed it to. Pope had his eyes on Cath, looking at her like she was a slab of raw steak and he was a bulldog. Ugh! _What is with this chick?! Why do men want her so much?_ I wonder if it would've been the same situation had I liked Deran or Craig or even J?

" **Welcome back, man."** Baz clanked his bottle to Pope's and sat down at the island.

" **So where's J? Off to his girlfriend's house so that he can blab shit?"**

" **Well, there's nothing for him to blab about."** Baz said. **"Besides, he's okay….right, Jack?"** He looked at me pointedly.

I shrugged and looked at Pope. **"Of course he's okay. Ya' ain't gotta worry 'bout him."**

" **Sure,"** Pope smirked. **"ask Rabbit. She has a crush on him, anyway."**

I picked up a pinch of bread crumbs and tossed them at him. **"Shut up! I do not!"** I laughed and rolled my eyes. At least he still had his sense of humor.

" **Okay, so what are we planning next?"**

* * *

We all fell silent. The next job. Baz looked at Smurf, who looked at him and then at me and then looked down. That meant she wasn't answering shit and I wasn't either. Baz was the first to grow some balls, though I knew he really didn't want to answer that question **. "Listen…"** It was all he said. Okay, maybe those balls shriveled up.

Pope sighed out of frustration. He looked at Smurf. **"You're not gonna tell me? I'm not a part of this anymore?"**

Smurf stopped what she was doing instantly and looked at him defiantly. **"Of course you are! But in case it slipped your mind, this is your first day out of prison. Maybe you should sit this one out."**

He leaned in. **"And where should I sit exactly since J is in my room?"**

She looked back down and continued with the meatloaf. **"Sleep on the sofa for a night or two."**

" **A night or two,"** Pope chuckled harshly. **"wow. Like it's any better than that motel no-tel."** He turned his back on us.

I spoke up. **"You can't stay here, Pope. We can't have your parole officer barging in all the time, giving you piss tests."** I bit my lip, sympathizing with him. I wanted him here with us, but there was no way he could stay.

" **Rabbit's right. Think about this."** Smurf pleaded.

Sighing, Pope rubbed his face on his arm, before finally turning around. **"Screw it. I'll just crash at my place."**

We froze again. Smurf looked at me and Baz. Baz cleared his throat. **"Yeah, you can't."** He cut eyes to Smurf, then back to his brother. **"We sold it."**

Pope looked flabbergasted as shit. **"You what?"** He was calm…ish. But I could tell his temper was boiling right beneath the surface.

" **Pope,"** Baz began. **"We're gonna get you a new place. Don't make a big deal out of it. It's cool, man."**

That didn't sit well with Pope, but he still didn't blow a lid. **"First, you tell me I'm not in on the job. Then you give my room to this…kid who we know nothing about. And now I'm finding out you sold my shit and all I got is a fucking sofa outta this."**

" **You'll get your cu—"**

" **I don't want your fucking pity cut!"** Pope cut him off.

" **Do you not understand your situation, Pope?!"** Baz asked, exasperated. **"You just got outta prison! If you even pee the wrong way, you're going back!"**

" **I AIN'T GOING BACK!"** He threw the bottle across the room, hitting the wall. **"I ain't. Going. Back."** With that, he walked back outside.

I was right behind him. **"Andrew!"** He stopped. I stopped. I continued speaking. **"Baz is—"**

" **I know. You think he's right."** He walked back to the grill and picked up the sledge, though he just held it in his hands.

" **You know this shit is unpredictable. A second too long or a miscalculation is all it takes for you to get caught and go down even longer this time. We lost you once. We can't lose you again. Think about what it would do to Smurf. She wasn't the same with you on the inside. Didn't eat or sleep. Just smoked all day and sat around the pool."**

He was quiet. Then again, he was never really a talker until he got pissed. He glanced at me. **"What do you think of J?"**

" **I told you. I like him."** I smiled.

" **I don't."** He stared at the pool.

" **Julia did. Julia loved him, therefore you should, too. After all, he's her son. Your twin sister's son; your nephew. Spitting image of her. She wouldn't really care about the others, but she would want you to like him. She would want nothing else, only that. I'm not saying you gotta be all in the kid's face. Just give him a chance. For Julia."**

He stopped and sighed. He troubled eyes found mine. I could practically spread the tension in them with a knife. **"I feel like my life stopped when I was inside. Then one day, I woke up and…it was over. I was a walking corpse. I get out and my still is over."**

Closing the distance between us, I wrapped my arms around him; his sliding around my waist. **"Your life isn't over, Andy. Ya' just gotta lay low for a little while. That's all. It's gonna get better. Promise."**

He rested his chin on the top of my head. **"Yeah…right."**

* * *

Later on that night, Pope was sitting in the family room by himself, the only light being that of the television. I had been watching him the last half hour. He sat in that one spot, staring at the television, though I highly doubt he was actually watching it. Baz and I were worried about his behavior when we saw him in the middle of the night, looking up at the moon as if he wanted to bay at it.

The kitchen door slid open, causing me to glance behind me. It was J. Smiling, I gave a little wave. **"Hey you. Have fun at your Old Lady's?"**

He gave a sheepish smile. **"Yeah. Something like that. I told her about my mom."**

I furrowed my brows. **"You know…I'm really sorry about ya' mama. I ain't never met her, either. I've always wanted to. I've never had a sister, but I still thought of her as one. Used to think about the day where I'd finally meet her. I've seen pictures. You look just like her. She was beautiful."**

He nodded, his eyes cast to the ground. **"Thanks."** he mumbled. Walking in further, he looked at Pope.

I turned back around and set my sights on him again. **"That's all he's been doing. Just sitting, watching that damn documentary. Looking straight through it, not at it, ya' know?"** I walked further into the room; J following me. Finally Pope spoke.

" **Who's cuts your hair, J?"**

His shoulders stiffened. **"Uh, my girlfriend?"**

" **You think she'd cut mine if I asked her?"**

" **Maybe. Yeah?"**

" **You know where the boys are, Rabbit?"**

I swallowed hard. I did. They were out searching for tweakers to pin their next job on. Probably had them locked up in the truck or something. I couldn't say anything, though. They made me promise not to tell, which was a bitch because I hated lying to Pope. **"No."**

There was a long silence. **"You know where the boys are, J?"**

My head snapped to him. He better not tell if he did know. **"No. I was at my girlfriend's house."**

Good answer, but I could tell Pope didn't like that very much. His head tilted to the side. **"You know…you can tell me things, right? Your mom and I were twins, ya' know? So…we had a lot in common."** He finally turned around and faced up, his eyes on J. **"We slept in the same room for years. The same bed. When it rained hard…you know she was scared of thunder. So if you ever wanna talk or feel scared, I'm here for you, okay?"** I smiled softly at that. There was the Pope I knew. J nodded his head a little and Pope turned away. The both of us walked out, leaving him alone.

My room was next door to his so I had to pass it up to get to mine. I stopped at my threshold, before backing up and catching J's attention. **"See? Give us a chance. You'll see that we're okay people. He means that, J. Pope…he can be intimidating. Scary at times. But…he really is a good listener. The others…they don't give him enough credit when it comes to those things. He's smart. Smarter than he looks and smarter than you might think. And he's not the only one you can talk to, alright? You can come to me, too. You know that, right?"**

He nodded, giving me a half smile. My heart fluttered yet again. He really did need to smile more often. " **Yeah. I know."**

Nodding, the two of us went inside our respective rooms. Done for the night.

* * *

It was the morning of Julia's funeral. Well, just the burial, actually. Smurf didn't want to have an actual funeral. She was keeping a straight face, not showing any emotion. I knew she was hurting inside, even if she hadn't seen Julia in years. They were estranged, but she was still Smurf's daughter and no mother should ever have to bury their child. I think deep down inside, Smurf knew this would happen to Julia. I've heard some great things about her, yet her drug usage, and how hard she used, always came up. She was a junkie. Smurf didn't like that.

" **Look at you."** she said, smiling at J. **"Let me help you with your tie."** She took the silk fabric in her fingers and worked it effortlessly.

Deran walked in with a stink face that was priceless. **"Wow. You give him my shit. Look's like my best shirt, too."**

" **Oh, shut up Deran."** I said. **"You hate wearing this shit, anyway. You haven't worn it in ages."** I watched him walk off in a huff. Big baby. Smurf gave me a look, which I shrugged my shoulders and waved him off.

Getting in between me and J, she placed her arms around both our shoulders. **"My two babies. You two look so beautiful. You know, J, when you were a little boy, Deran used to ride you to the highway on his red BMX so that he could teach you to throw rocks at cars."** She stopped and chuckled. **"Trust me, he'll come around."**

J was quiet. Staring at Smurf. She bent her heard down. **"What? Talk to me."**

" **My mom used to have a shirt just like that."**

Smurf sighed and looked down at her sleeveless gold shirt. **"She used to borrow this from me all the time. She must have gotten one for herself."** She shrugged. **"I'm wearing this to feel closer to her today."** She stood back. **"Well? How do I look?"**

" **Good."** was all J said.

I nodded in agreement. **"Very good."**

She nodded, pleased with our answer. **"Correct. My beautiful babies."**

Julia's burial was quiet and small. Not a large turn out, but then again, she didn't have a lot of friends. It was still nice to see the people who loved her show up to be there for her. It really didn't matter whether it was a large crowd or a small crowd. We loved her. Even me. Even though I didn't know her, I still considered her my big sister. The sister I will never get to meet now. That made me sad.

Smurf looked around. **"Would anybody like to say anything?"** She looked over at J. **"J?"** He was quiet. "J?" She rubbed the back of his neck. Still, he was quiet. I knew he wanted to say something, but he probably didn't know how to say it. Who is ever prepared to bury their mom?

" **Don't let them fool you, J."**

I looked up to see a black woman standing across from us, on the other side of Julia's casket. **"They don't belong here, J. Don't stand there wit'em. Don't."**

I made a face. **"Who do you think you are? Of course we're gonna stand here and with J, too. We're family. Who the hell are you?"**

J leaned in to me. **"Don't worry 'bout it. She's my neighbor."**

" **That still don't make it right for her to say that!"**

Craig grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I looked all the way up at him and then sighed. I should shut up, but I was pissed. J spoke up. **"Deena, not now. Please."**

Deena stepped forward. **"Maybe she was weak, but she did everything she could to protect you from them."**

J sighed. **"Look…I'm fine, Deena. Thank you for coming, really, but please…not here."**

I held my chin higher. He stood up for us in his own little way. Good for him. **"Get the hell outta here."**

Craig backed me up. **"You heard my sister. Get the hell outta here."**

Turning, the woman walked away. Smurf asked if anyone else would like to say anything and no one did. Soon afterwards, everyone started walking away, leaving Julia there. I, on the other hand, stayed there with J. He walked forward, dropping his rose onto his mother's casket. I did the same with mine. **"Bye, Jules.** **We'll see ya' later."** Hopefully, much, much later. I didn't say that, however. Grabbing J's arm, I wrapped my hands around it and walked with him to my car. **"I'm here if ya' need to talk. I know I keep saying that, but I figured maybe one day you'll believe me. It took me awhile to open up to them. Baz was the first I opened up to, then Pope, then Smurf. Everybody else fell in after. I know what you're going through. I lost my mom some years ago. Living on the streets. Next thing you know, I find myself with a mama that loves me more than my real mama. I'm grateful, and I'm grateful I have big brothers to talk to whenever I need it. You have that, too. I'm not just your hot aunt."** I smiled. **"I'm also your friend."** Leaning in, I kissed his arm and laid my head on it.

I saw Pope watching us across the way. I felt sorry for him. Julia was his twin. J lost a mom and Pope lost his twin. When we made it to my car, I walked to Pope and kissed his lips. **"I love you, Andy."**

He smiled softly. **"I know. I love you, too, Rabbit."**

" **You alright?"**

He nodded. **"I will be."**

Nodding myself, I looked over at Baz, who was looking at the two of us. I still haven't spoken to him and I don't know when I will. I'm too embarrassed about what happened. I'm sure there weren't many sisters in the world who threw themselves at their brother, only to get shot down cold. I have noticed, however, on Amazon, there was a large amount of romance novels involving girls fucking their step-brothers. It was like a fad now. Like Twat-light or The Fugly Games or that 50 Shades of Shit crap. Maybe I wasn't alone in this. Still didn't make me feel any better. He began to walk towards us. As soon as that happened, I got in my car. He came to my window and knocked on it. I didn't acknowledge him. I put my favorite Chanel shades on and drove off.

" **You mad at Baz?"** J asked me.

Sighing, I shrugged. **"Something like that."** I glanced over at him. **"You alright?"**

He nodded slowly. **"Something like that."**


	6. Shattered Glass - Chapter Five

Craig and Deran picked up J at the beach. The rest of us were waiting for them at our favorite restaurant. When they walked in, I spotted the infamous 'girlfriend' of J. The one he spent all his time with and quite frankly, we didn't trust her. Craig and Deran met her once on the beach and from what they said: she was a groupie from the start. She was a cutie, though. Thick, too. I'd pegged him a lover of skinny bitches, but this girl had a little baby fat to her. I liked that because I was on the thick side myself. Guys wanted girls like us for our size. I would try losing the weight by exercising and other shit, but nothing really happened. I would lose a little fat but gain muscle. Didn't help that I was so short.

The four of them sat down and we ordered a shit load of food. Somehow, I ended up next to Baz. I still haven't spoken to him. I think he forgot I was upset at him because he was touching my thigh under the table. I kept pushing his hand away, but somehow—dear Lord—it ended back on my thigh... and higher.

" **Open up, girl."** Craig said to Nicky. She had a 'WTF' look on her face that I found funny. **"Come on. A hundred bucks says you can catch this in your mouth."** He held up a shrimp.

She looked around at us and I nodded, smiling widely. **"Go ahead. Easy money, girl."**

" **Fine. Two hundred bucks. Come on. You in?"** Craig up'd it. There was no way this girl was going to turn down an easy two hundred even.

She sat up straight, ready for anything. Opening her mouth, she waited for the shrimp. Only it didn't get into her mouth, rather her face and plopped on the floor. We laughed and I clapped. **"Try again. Come on. Two hundred, chica."**

Craig tossed again, and yet again, Nicky didn't get it. Jesus. Really? J leaned in to her. **"You really don't have to do this, Nicky."** Maybe he knew she was doing this to fit in with us. People were usually weary of us, but not her. She acted as if we were her best friends. One half of me said to get this bitch away from J despite me not knowing her, and the other half wanted me to admire her for not being scared of us.

" **Shut up, man,"** Craig snapped. **"That's just…that's just loser talk. Come on, girl. You got this."** Deran gave a drumroll and I was right with him, despite Baz's hand rubbing my thigh. Craig tossed one more. Bam, the broad caught it. **"OH! SHE SCORES!"** A man of his word, Craig handed her the bills and she snatched them up, thanking him, before rolling the cash and stuffing it in her bra. J was quiet after that. He looked at me. I gave him a wink and an encouraging smile. He would have to warm up to us sooner or later.

* * *

After dinner, I was in the kitchen putting up the doggy bags. I scrunched up my nose at the shrimp. I was allergic to the shit so I made sure to put it in an air tight container and away from everything else in the fridge. Wiping up the counter, once again, I felt a familiar body against mine from behind. Deja fucking vu. I stiffened when Baz's arms wrapped around me. His lips kissing my shoulder didn't ease the queasy feeling and the dread in the pit of my stomach.

" **Don't, Baz. Stop coming up behind me."**

" **I keep asking you why. I've** _ **been**_ **asking you for a few years. You won't tell me."**

I didn't want to tell him. I didn't think I had to tell him. He could do anything he wanted to me, except for that. If he knew I didn't like something, then he shouldn't do it. Point blank. I didn't want to be reminded of 'Him' anymore. My scar was a reminder all on its own. Pushing away from Baz, I tossed the towel in the sink. I was about to walk out of the kitchen, when he grabbed me and pulled me to him. Sighing, he held onto me. **"I'm sorry. Alright? I didn't mean what I said."**

Yeah. Right. **"Ah. So we're gonna make love? Turn this inexperienced pussy to experienced?"**

He shot me a look. **"You know what I mean. I stand by what I said. I can't be your first, Rabbit. Ya' gotta understand my perspective."**

I pulled back. **"Okay, fine. I do understand, but you're not understanding where I'm coming from. Look me in my eyes…"** I pointed two fingers towards my eyes. " **…and tell me we don't have something. That there's not shit between us."** He looked me in the eyes, but he didn't say shit. Exactly. **"See what I'm saying? It's there, Baz. So, why fight it?"**

" **I'm with Catherine."**

" **Ah, okay so you can feel all up on me, kiss me, and lay next to me in bed? That's not a normal brother-sister relationship."** That was a bullshit answer he had had and he knew it. Something like that would have sufficed a few years ago, but I'm on grown folk shit now. The fucker wasn't going to get away with that. **"Fuck Catherine. I could give a shit about** _ **Catherine**_ **. The only reason why I tolerate her no-havin' ass is so that I can see my niece. That's the** _ **only**_ **reason and that will always** _ **be**_ **the** _ **only**_ **reason. You hurt my feelings, Baz. You made me feel like some slut on the corner of Merle and Fifth. We kiss. We flirt. We touch. And it's beautiful. You're always telling me that I'm beautiful."**

" **Because you are, baby."**

" **See! You see that?! You just called me baby! And don't fucking say it's casual and shit. I know you, Baz. Better than anyone in this family! And…and they've known you longer than me! You made me feel like a whore, Baz. You like me running after you but, as soon as shit gets real, you step back. You're talking to me** _ **now**_ **because I've been ignoring your ass. If you love Catherine so much, then stop fucking with my head!"** I took another step back. **"You know what? You don't get to touch me.** _ **Eh-ver**_ **. You hear that? Yo' ass better get used to it too. Keith, the guy who lives five doors from ya'? He's been itching to get at this good-good for a while. I'm thinking about giving him a shot and—"**

He cut me off by pushing me against the counter. His body pinning me hard. I winced, feeling the hard marble against my back. **"Ouch! Barry!"**

" **He touches you and I'll kill 'im. Simple as that."** His voice was low and menacing. **"I'll shoot him in the fucking head and then I'll send Pope to slice and dice him like a fucking fish. You understand me?"**

I would be lying if I said the fire in his eyes turned me on. _Shit…I'm so fucked up in the head._ He meant those words. He meant every fucking letter in the sentences he said. That's how I knew he wanted me. He was just too fucking afraid. But he wasn't afraid to mark his territory. **"You don't own me, Baz."** Yeah, I tried it. What was he going to say to that now?

My guess was nothing right now. He was silent. His hands flattened on the top of the counter. I could feel every inch of him in a sense. It felt amazing. It would feel even better if we were in bed. He stared at me, before the wrinkles on the sides of his eyes deepened, as he smiled. The smile didn't reach his eyes, however. **"He doesn't touch you, Bonnie. If you let him, his blood will be on your hands. Could you live with that?"** His eyes were on my lips. My tongue snaked out and licked my lips before biting down on the bottom one. **"Stop biting that lip or I might have to kiss you."** I knew what that did to him, but honestly it was a small habit. Majority of the time, I didn't know when I was doing it. **"Now, I'm apologizing to you. I can't stand it when you're not talking to me. Alright? Please, Jack. Stop ignoring me. I'm sorry,"** he softly said.

Ugh. Like really? How could I stay mad at him, when his eyes go all soft like that? The sincerity pouring out of them. I was winning, but now I think I'm losing. Sighing, I nodded. **"Fine. I forgive you."**

He ducked his head as if he couldn't hear me, leaning his ear closer. **"What? What did you say? Speak up."**

I rolled my eyes and chuckled, giving him a playful shove. **"I said, I forgive you dumbass."**

Smiling, that twinkle in his eyes, he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to him. His fingers finding themselves under my shirt. His nails scratching my back. They sent little shivers throughout my body. **"Mmmm. That feels good,"** I said softly. Tightening my hold on him. I loved his back and the way it rippled under my touch sometimes. My hands flattened against it. His lips found my shoulder again, before trailing to the crook of my neck. Gosh, he knew how to get me going. Just from a simple kiss. I pulled my hands between us and then slid them to the back of his strong neck and shoulders. One of his hands gripped my hip, before making its way to my backside. He squeezed it, holding on to it possessively. I felt his need from that one motion. I knew what he was saying. _I_ was his. All that talk yesterday morning was just that. Talk. In one way or the other, I was going to have Baz Blackwell physically and mentally. And when that happens, I'm going to personally buy Cath a one way plane ticket for her to leave Lena with us and get the hell out of dodge. Adios tu puta senorita.

* * *

We all were hanging out in the living room for the rest of the night. Just us family, and Nicky, who was hanging all up on J. It was sweet. He seemed like he was really into her. I finished cleaning up the kitchen. It took longer than what it was supposed to because Baz was 'helping' me. We kissed and whatnot and made up a little bit more, but when it got a little too heated, I decided to move away. I had him where I wanted him. He was inching closer and closer. I could taste him. But something different was going to happen. _I'm gonna make you want me and when you do, I'm gonna pay ya' ass back for the shit you put me through. Asshole. My beautiful, sinewy, golden specimen of a man…._ Wow, did I have to sound like Helga from ' _Hey Arnold'_?"

Smurf sat behind Craig, rubbing his shoulders while he chopped up his favorite 'midnight snack'. I sat next to Smurf, my legs stretched out.

Baz walked into the room and nearly flipped his shit when he saw what Craig was doing. I mean, it's not like it was anything new, but considering what we all went through today with Julia's funeral and the fact that she died of a drug overdose and her son was sitting not two feet from him… **"Are you fucking serious right now? With all of us hanging out, you're gonna go chopping in?!"**

Craig, being the ever so rebel that he is, did another line of blow and sarcastically said, " **Avert your eyes, Father."**

Baz leaned in. **"Why don't ya' try sleeping for once in ya' life. It's good for ya'."**

" **Rabbit? You wanna get Baz a drink? A big one so he will chill the fuck out?"** He did yet another line. Snorting it up and sniffing heavily. His face falling deeper and deeper into a euphoric countenance. **"Or better yet, let 'im eat you out finally so he can get off all of our backs."**

" **Shut up, Craig**!" I reached down and backhanded the shit out of his face. They all saw our chemistry, yes, but I didn't want that shit broadcast in front of J and Nicky. Not just yet. I still needed to win J over.

" **Wait, you're fucking your brother?"** Nicky sat up quickly.

" **D's smoking pot! I'm not the only wanting to fry right now!"** Luckily, Craig changed the subject, but it wasn't like it was for the better.

When Baz couldn't get through to Craig, he set his sights on Deran. Deran looked up at Baz. **"Ay, don't pull me into this bullshit. I ain't fucking siblings and never have."**

" **Guys, seriously. This is getting ri-dick."** I shook my head. I knew where Baz was getting at. These two numbnuts needed to respect the situation that went on today, plus they needed to be ready for tonight. Everything has to be on point.

Ignoring us, Craig looked at Nicky. **"Hey, you wanna taste**?" Nicky looked eager to, but J nipped that shit quickly. **"Hey man, don't trample on her freedom."** He looked at Nicky. **"Sweetheart, you want a taste or not?"**

Nicky looked at J and like the diligent girlfriend she was, she shook her head and said, **"Thanks. I'll just stick with weed."** Hm. I would say 'good girl' for listening to her man. At the same time, we need to know if the broad is cool or not. If she does this shit with us, she'd be involved, which meant she couldn't rat us out for shit.

" **Deran, give the lady another '** _ **burnie'**_ **for the lady."** Deran didn't respond and Craig responded to that by chucking a magazine at him.

Getting nowhere, Baz banged his fist on the back of the couch and shot up straight. **"Fine! I'm going home!"** He turned around and walked out.

I waited for him to exit the house before I said anything else. " **Ya'll know why he's mad, yet you don't give a shit."**

" **Well, what happened? Why is he mad? Is he mad because I'm smoking a little something?"**

My eyes dropped to hers with one brow raised. **"Could you just hurry up and get wasted already so that you'd stop asking for questions?"**

* * *

Sometime later on, I was pulling a red hoodie over a black muscle shirt, coupled with black skinny jeans, black socks, and black sneakers. My long braids were hanging down, tucked inside my hoodie. Topped off with a black skull cap. I heard Deran walk past my door. Swinging it open quickly, I was behind him in a flash.

" **Grab those two bags off the table, Rabbit. Meet us outside. Hurry it up."**

" **Yes, sir."** I saluted and went straight to the kitchen. Grabbing the bags, I made sure everything we needed was in them. Baz had just pulled up when I walked outside. Getting in the back along with Deran, I tossed the bags beside me. Driving down the driveway, Baz looked at me through his rearview **. "I really wish you would wear black when you do this shit with us, Jack."**

I was putting on my special 'sticky fingers' gloves when I gave him a look. **"A good career thief doesn't need to dress in all black because a good career thief won't get caught unless he or she wants to. A good little 'thiefer' is just that fucking good. I ain't wearing all black. Never have. Never will. Besides, Carmen Sandiego wore a long ass red coat and hat. Oh! Almost forgot…I got one for one of the tweakers."** I pulled it out of one of the bags. **"They got a shit ton of'em at the dollar tree. I roughed it up a little. Had a pitbull piss and shit on it at the beach. Put a few burn marks on it. It's an everyday hoodie that will be worn by an everyday tweaker. I'll even rub it on his hair. Get all his good dna on it."**

Craig chuckled. **"Good girl."**

Baz nodded. **"Alright, then. Ya'll remember the plan?"**

" **Duh."** Deran mumbled.

" **Says the one who forgot the details to our last heist."** Craig said, rolling his eyes.

Deran shot him a look. **"I hope you get shot in the ass tonight."** both men shared a laugh.

We drove another twenty minutes before getting to the warehouse. With our faces shielded, we got in and wasted no time. " **Rise and shine, kids."** I said. **"Party's over."** We started to pull them out of the awaiting Tahoe.

" **Ugh, man, it reeks in here!"** Even through his mask, I could tell Craig was making a stink face. It really did fucking stink. I took the hoodie out and rubbed it all over one of the tweakers, before we threw them in the back, letting him lay on it. I'll help him in it in a few.

" **DNA jackpot."** Baz said.

Deran piped in, **"This should keep the crime labs busy."** Quickly, we all got in the Tahoe and peeled the fuck out of there.

We drove a couple blocks away, before we stopped and let them out. Baz cut the zip ties. As soon as he did my tweaker, I helped him in the hoodie. **"This is yours. Keep it."**

Baz got out a couple of 'rocks' and tossed it to them, along with a spoon, lighter and syringe. **"It's feeding time. Don't do it all at once."** Before he even finished the sentence, they tore into that shit. In a flash, we were back in the truck, heading towards the watch store. About a minute out, we suited up even more. Gloved to cover our hands. Mouth guards to give a deformity to our faces. Our masks and bike helmets to cover up our identities as much as possible. I wore boots with lifts that gave me a good six inches to my height. And of course, I wore more padding under my clothes to hide my shape and breasts, giving me a bulkier look; and slipped on a pair of long, baggy pants. We were covered from head to toe. All remnants of us disappeared, along with any nerves and doubts. Couldn't be scared while doing this shit and we certainly couldn't think twice about anything. It was a grab-n-go robbery. Once we break into the place, we only have a short amount of time before the cops show up. Everything was choreographed down to our farts.

When the Mark was in view, I felt my adrenaline kick in. I lived for this shit. I was good before I met the Cody's, but I was better after. **"WHOO!"** I slapped at Craig's shoulders, hard.

" **This is it, baby girl! Got money?"**

Deran was in the getaway, leaving me, Baz and Craig in the framer. Ramming our way in, we quickly jumped out and got to work. Hammers shattered the glass cases as we took what we could in sight. The watches were dope. What we were gonna sell them for was gonna be even doper.

My eyes were crazed, seeing the diamond, gold, and platinum pieces everywhere.

My gloves allowed me to quickly snatch my shit up and drop them in the bag with ease.

35 seconds.

That was our window. It was all the time we needed.

When Craig's watch went off, it was like someone stopped time…and then it started right back up again. Hoisting our bags onto our shoulders, we ran out the back. Up the stairs we went and to the roof. Deran better be fucking there or we would be in deep shit. We got to the fire escape. I went first, sliding down on the sides of my shoes and jumped the rest of the way, landing on my feet. Next came Craig. Then Baz. Deran was there and in we jumped into the getaway. **"Go, go, go!"**

" **Let's go!"** Baz reiterated; so did Craig.

Finally, we were able to take our shit off. Finally, we were able to breathe. **"WHOO!"** I laughed, but stopped as my body shot forward when Deran slid to a stop. Four sets of eyes stared straight ahead.

Security.

" **What the fuck?!"** They knew what was up right away. While they ran towards us, Deran threw the getaway in reverse. Baz was pissed. We all were.

" **Deran, Goddamn it! You said there would be no security on the south end, you piece of shit!"**

He stopped the car. We yelled for him to drive. That's when shit got real. Taking a sharp right, the guards caught up to us. One even grabbed on and opened Deran's door. Still, he drove like a maniac, knowing he needed to get us the fuck out of there and lose that pig or we were all gonna go down. He told us he had him before he slammed the fucker into a dumpster. That's when the second fucker opened fire, hitting our back window. I yelled, ducking my head.

Baz's head snapped back. **"Get down, Bonnie! Stay down! Stay down!"** His hand held my head down, while he tried not to get himself hit too. My head was turned so that I was looking at Craig. He unzipped his jacket and revealed his shirt already being stained with blood.

" **Shit! Craig's hit!"**

By the time we got home, the sun was up. I bolted in the house. **"Ma! Ma!"**

Smurf moved out of the den at lightning speed. **"What?! Rabbit, what's going on?!"**

" **Craig's been shot!"** Pope dashed towards the door, however Baz and Deran burst in with Craig.

" **Oh my God! Craig!"**

Pope moved out of the way, slamming the door shut. **"Put him on the pool table. Now!"** He ordered. Baz and Deran did as they were told. Then Deran disappeared. Smurf went after him. **"Rabbit, go into the kitchen. Get the tools."** I nodded, knowing what tools he meant. It took me ten seconds to do so, coming back and handing Baz the black felt sack. We both 'washed' our hands in peroxide and then medical anti-bacterial. He instructed me to clean the wound with the peroxide. I did as I was told. Next, came the forceps. **"Jack? I need you to hold the skin down with the tweezers. Pope…hold down Craig."**

Craig moaned. **"Fuuuck."** He started breathing hard, readying himself for the pain that was about to come and boy, did it come. He yelled and screamed and the more he did so, the harder it was for Pope and even me, to hold him down. Minutes later, the door opened and in walked J. Where the fuck was he? Didn't matter. Nothing could be heard throughout the house but Craig's screams and Smurf singing. The words sounded like they were for Deran, which only meant one thing. Deran fucked up and he knew he fucked up and now instead of trying to help his fucking brother, he was laying with Smurf snotting, sniffing and crying his eyes out.

I looked in Baz's eyes as he finally got the bullet out. This was so fucked up.


	7. Shattered Glass - Chapter Six

A day passed and everything seemed to have been normal. We did a job and to celebrate, we had a pool party. The boys were in the pool playing basketball.I could never join because they were too rough. They played hard. Partied hard and drank hard. Poor J was right in the middle of it.

Craig couldn't play, of course, so he sat on the edge with me and Nicky. Deran joined us a little while later. It was one against one: Baz against Pope. Always trying to measure their dicks. There's no privacy in this family, so it's safe to say I've seen all of my brothers' pricks.

Baz won. Hands down. All T, no Shade.

"Aw, here we go with this shit again." Craig muttered, taking a swig of his beer.

I looked over at J, who was watching on, probably wondering what that statement meant. " **They go at it like cats and dogs. Always trying to one up each other. Never get in a cock fight with these two because even if you win, ya' lose…no whatta' mean?"** He nodded his head before I took another shot of Jack and coke.

Smurf walked out with a plate of nachos. Deran looked back at her. **"Who're ya' rooting for, Ma?"**

" **Both of them, baby."** she said in that motherly fashion. It was true though. She never picked one kid over the other, though we all knew she trusted Baz more than any of us. **"That's the beauty of being a mother. You never have to pick sides."** She watched closely, as she set the nachos down. **"Nicky? Why don't you help me with the food trays?"**

She smiled. **"Sure,"** she said before leaning over, kissing J, and then giving me a look. _'Did I just…? Did she just…? Uh….the fuck was that?'_ Yes, I was jealous because the one I loved was a few feet away, who apparently didn't want inexperienced pussy…or whatever bullshit he spewed off at the mouth that day.

Nicky left, leaving us siblings and J alone. Pope and Baz got outta the pool. **"Awww, ya' gotta bloody nose, Popey."** I threw a towel at him.

" **It ain't the first time. Remember that one time you got so pissed at me, you kicked me in the mouth and chipped my tooth?"** He laughed and hugged it out with Baz.

" **Hey, I told you I was ticklish!"**

He wiped at his face, staring at J. Sizing him up. Everyone—even those who were blind—could tell he didn't trust the kid. Craig fixed us all shots and handed Baz one. Craig took one and so did me and Deran. J denied one. Pope didn't like that. **"Hey. I scored. You gotta take a drink."**

Baz chuckled. **"Give the kid a break, man. It's barely noon and he's already had six."**

Still, Pope didn't like that. **"Drink. It's the rules."**

J looked at me, while Craig held the glass out to him. I wanted to tell him no, but I knew this was a test. They needed to know he would do anything they say. To prove he was on their side. Then, later on, they were going to teach him to stand up to them and grow balls. It was how loyalty was made in this family. I nodded to him. **"Go 'head, baby. It's okay. I wouldn't tell ya' that if I knew somethin' was gonna happen to ya'."** Leaning over, I kissed his lips **. "It's all in good fun."**

" **Yeah. All in good fun.** " Baz repeated, giving me a look. I knew what it was for and frankly, I didn't care. Sure, we made up, but the fact of the matter was he would still choose Catherine over me. Always. He had my forgiveness this time, but with that he didn't know it came with a price. I was going to make him sorry for not taking me.

Reluctantly, J took the glass and stared at it, before taking a big swallow. It hit him hard. Giving him an encouraging slap on the shoulder, he coughed and grabbed at his chest. He really wasn't used to this lifestyle, but I had a feeling he was going to have to get used to it quickly or the boys, mainly Pope, weren't going to take kindly to that shit regardless of what me and Smurf thought. J was here because of Smurf and he remained here because of her and me.

Standing, I took all the beer bottles I could hold in my arms. I felt Baz's eyes on me and when I glanced back, sure enough, he was staring. Let me give you one guess where his eyes were glued. My ass.

I smirked.

Deran winked. God, could he be more obvious. It was no secret. The whole family knew I had a thing for Baz and he did for me, he just didn't return those feelings. From what I heard, he did with Julia. Was she the reason why he didn't want to go down that road again? **"Hey, Rabbit? Maybe next time buy a suit that's actually, you know, a suit. Not a string with a piece of fabric covering your cunt."**

I gave him a sarcastic pout. **"Then you four wouldn't have anything to jerk off to at night."** Smiling sweetly and blowing them an awkward kiss (with the bottles in my arms), I turned and walked into the kitchen.

" **God, do you always cook like this?"** Nicky shook her head and laughed, smiling at me as I walked in.

" **My boys have big appetites. So does my baby girl. She may be small, but she can out eat them any day."** She winked at me, which caused me to blush. **"Just you wait. When you get married, maybe to J, you'll have to cook like this. He's just a kid, but he's got an appetite, too. Take a lesson from me. Enough is never enough."**

" **And even more is never enough,"** I finished the sentence.

Smurf smirked. **"That's my baby girl."** Leaning over, she kissed my lips.

Nicky cleared her throat. **"You guys are close, huh? Your family? I mean, it's none of my business, but I noticed you guys doing that. Kissing each other and stuff. I don't think it's weird or anything. I see other families do it, too. It's not something my, uh, family does. My stepmom is always talking about germs and shit. It's like, you fuck my dad, don't you?"** She laughed. **"You're lucky to have Rabbit and your boys."**

" **If you were shipwrecked on a desert island,"** Smurf began, giving me a teasing glance, before looking back to Nicky. **"And you could only choose one, who would you pick? Other than J, of course."** She shrugged and Nicky's reluctant look. **"I'm just asking. I mean, you're a beautiful girl."** She watched as the teenager looked back at the boys. I watched her intently and narrowed my eyes, getting another beer out of the fridge. Oh, she was choosing alright. But which one? And if she said J, she was lying through her asshole.

She looked back at us and bit her lip, smiling. **"Baz is pretty cool."**

Smurf winked at her and handed her the pepper canister to shake over the meat. Nicky giggled and nodded her head. **"Definitely Baz. He's hot. And older. And I like his body."** She laughed. **"Oh my God, I can't believe I just said that."**

" **It's all in good fun. Right, Rabbit?"** Smurf looked at me.

I gave Ma a smile, but my eyes told her I was about ready to snatch that bitch. Baz?! Is she fucking kidding me?! Out of all the dick that stood tall outside, including the dick I knew she sat on every other night—the fucking twit—she had to choose _my_ dick?! Excuse me, I meant Flat-Ass' dick.

" **Rabbit?"** Smurf cut me from my thoughts. " **Take these drinks out to the boys. Tell'em Nicky and I will be out with the rest of the food in a minute."**

Nodding, I took the beers and rushed outside.

" **It's about time!"** Craig raised his hand for his bottle, which I gave to him.

I handed them out to the rest of the boys. **"Where's J?"**

" **Had to take a leak."** Deran said.

Scoffing, I rolled my eyes and tossed his bottle onto one of the loungers.

" **What's gotten into your tits?"** Craig asked.

I shook my head, popping open my bottle. **"Ma asked that twit if she were stranded on a desert island, which one of you guys would she pick."**

Deran shrugged. **"Duh. J."** He took another drink and jumped in the pool with Baz. Craig got in too, but his shoulders stayed above water, of course.

I sat down with a huff, putting my legs in the water. Pope sat down next to me. **"She chose Baz, didn't she?"**

He didn't even have to ask. He just knew. **"Outta all you guys, the first name that popped out of her pretty little dick sucking lips was Baz. She said he was cool and she liked his body and he was older. Baz doesn't belong to her."** I said through gritted teeth.

"Nor does he belong to Cath." Pope muttered.

I laid my head down on his shoulder. **"Why do you like her so much? What the fuck is up with you and Baz? Why is her pussy so good? What's wrong with my pussy? What's wrong with me?"**

" **It ain't about that."** Pope said softly. **"You're beautiful and could choose any guy you wanna choose. But you don't want him liking ya' for what ya got down there. Ya' want him to like ya' for other things. You know this. But to answer your question…I care about Cath. What we did was a mistake. So she says, but I know otherwise. Remember what I told you what happened that night? It was different than sex. More than sex. But she's so fucking guilty for liking it, that she tells herself that she was trying to get back at Baz."**

" **Not true."**

" **Definitely not true. I care about her. Baz is with her because he feels responsible for her."**

I lifted my head. My brows furrowing. **"Why? Why does he feel responsible for her? Because she used to follow him around when you guys were kids?"** Pope shook his head, which meant he couldn't tell me. I huffed. **"You tell me everything!** **We don't keep secrets from each other! Now we are and it's because of her!"** I tried to move away from him, but he grabbed my head and brought it to his mouth, kissing the back of it.

" **Baz did something some years ago that involved Cath. She doesn't know it. Just us…except you and J of course. He feels like it was his fault so…he watched over her and it turned into something more. He likes her. Cares for her, but he doesn't love her. Not like I do. Trust me. He doesn't love her. I bet my life on it. If what Nicky said made you mad, then—"**

" **It wasn't just that."** I sighed and told him what happened a few mornings ago. He understood now why there was tension between me and Baz. He thought it was just the usual arguments we were always having.

Lifting my chin so that I was looking into his eyes, he gave me a smile that was only meant for me. **"He notices you, Rabbit. Anybody can see that. Even Cath. But making him notice you ain't enough. Ya' gotta make him want you. Ya' gotta make him remember that you belong to him, yeah, but he needs to understand that he belongs to you, too."**

" **How do I do that?"**

" **You know how to get guys. I don't need to tell you how to charm a bastard, but you gotta step it up a bit. Use a different tactic. Don't do what you're used to doing. Don't do the norm."** He leaned in closer. **"It's simple, Rabbit: make him jealous. Give your attention to someone else, and not just anybody else.** _ **Someone**_ **else."**

His eyes left mine and I followed them to who he was looking at. **"Josh."** I said quietly.

* * *

We were all dried up, tired, and full as a tick. Everyone changed into regular clothes, except me. Sort of. I kept my suit top on, but pulled on a pair of short, tight biker short. Smurf had just put the food away and was going to lay down for a nap. Baz was going to stay and shut his eyes for a bit, but he knew he had to get home to Cath. Craig was going into town and offered to give Nicky a ride home. Josh agreed because he wasn't feeling so hot so the two parted ways, with Craig taking her home. Deran went to his room and got on the X-Box, watching for a phone call that hadn't come yet and apparently was pissing him off.

J was in his room. I passed by and saw him sitting on the bed with his head between his legs. Stopping, I walked in and sat down next to him, rubbing his thigh **. "You're not used to all that drinking, are ya?"** I chuckled. **"It'll get better. You'll eventually build up your tolerance. You don't always have to do what they say. They are just trying to make you a part of the family. I hope you know that."**

He nodded and tried to smile, but it didn't happen. He rushed off the bed and hurled in his trash can.

Getting up, I went to the bathroom and wetted him a towel and put it on the back of his neck. A few minutes later, he began to feel a little bit better. Not much. **"Here, take your shirt off."** I didn't wait for him to do it because I knew he wouldn't, so I did it myself. Letting my eyes take in his body, I licked my lips. **"Turn around and lay down on your stomach."** I turned him and gently pushed him on the bed.

" **Whatta ya—"**

" **Shhh, I'm gonna make you feel better."**

" **Um…what? How?"**

" **Just take your fucking shirt off."** He did before I finished the sentence. Straddling his butt, I started rubbing his back. I was lucky. He was extremely tense, which meant the back rub was going to loosen his muscles and make him forget about the fact that he had to ralph **. "There we go."** I cooed into his ear, tempted to nibble on that adorable earlobe. **"Doesn't that feel a lot better?"** I took the towel and patted it against his neck and shoulders and back. Suddenly, I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand.

Baz.

I didn't have to look to know he was standing there watching.

Remembering what Pope said, which I wasn't dumb. I knew why he encouraged me to go after Baz. So that he could swerve and get right into Cath's arms.

I started softly grinding against his ass, while my hands and fingers worked their magic. From behind, from Baz's point of view, I knew what it looked like. Leaning down, I kissed the spot between J's shoulder blades. **"You need a tattoo right there. It'd look so hot on you."**

He chuckled. **"Nicky would kill me if I got it there. Maybe some other spot, but…"**

" **Who gives a fuck what Nicky thinks? It's your body and you can do whatever you want with your body. You can get a tattoo. You can drink with your uncles and aunts. You can…fuck any girl you wanna fuck. That dick doesn't belong to her. If it did, she'd know it and you'd know it, too."**

There was silence between us and I knew Baz was still standing there. Probably seething.

" **When I get a boyfriend, every inch of my body is going to belong to him. Every wet…tight…inch of—"**

" **Bonnie!"**

I paused. Smirking. Lifting my chest up, I looked behind me and gave Baz an innocent look. **"What's up, Baz? Ya' wanna back rub after I do J?"** He didn't say anything. Just stood there with a look of pure anger. Good. Moving off J, I kissed his back again. He looked like he was half way to sleep. **"He needs to sleep it off."** Going to his trash can, I closed up the back and picked up the can and sat it outside. It was Deran's turn to dump the trash in the house, so I'd leave the can next to our big bin as a little surprise.

Baz had followed me and slammed the garage door shut. I jumped a little and looked at him. **"What's wrong?"**

" **What the fuck was going on back there?"**

" **Huh? Oh, J? He wasn't feeling well. I think he went overboard with the swimming, mixed with all the food and the drinking."** I chuckled. I tried to walk past him, but he grabbed me and pushed my body against the wall. **"What the fuck is your problem?"**

He just stared at me and shook his head. His lips in a perfect, thin line. **"You givin' your shit to him?"**

I made a face. " **Well, that's a vulgar question."**

" **Like you don't have the mouth of a sailor. You giving your shit to him or not?!"**

" **It ain't none of your concern."** I lifted my chin out of sheer defiance. **"It ain't yours. It don't belong to you. You don't want it. It's too inexperienced. Maybe J is what I need. He's not that experienced. I can tell. Nicky is probably more of a whore than** **she's letting on. I can tell that, too. But I figured, hey…J is fresh meat. Fresh meat. Fresh dick and my pussy would love fresh dick."**

He punched the wall next to my head, causing the tools to fall to the floor in a loud clang. He pointed his finger in my face. He was wanting to say something, but nothing was coming out. I was pushing him. I was pushing him so close to the edge. **"You better watch yourself, Bonnie."**

 **"Or what?"**

 **"You won't like me when I'm angry, you hear me?"**

It took everything not to laugh in his face **. "Aw, Hulk mad? Hulk gonna smash?"**

 **"Don't piss me off, Bonnie."**

 **"And what if I do?! What I do and with whom I do it with ain't none of your concern! I don't ask about every time you're inside of Cath, do I? Maybe I should."** I wrapped my arms around his neck. **"Should I ask? Hm? Should I ask if you make her tighten her pussy around your dick so that it could feel more like mine? Do you fuck her from behind? That ass ain't like mine—all big and round—but you hold on to hers like it is. Your eyes are closed and you fantasize about me fucking that dick of yours that you come so fucking hard. I bet twice in a row. Once in her pussy and then when you look down, you can see my face looking back at you, telling you 'Daddy, I want more'. Then you'd come again, all on her back, because that's what you want to do to—"**

He punched the wall again, before pushing away from me. He gave me one last look before kicking open the door and walking out. Slamming it shut. I laughed. My heart beating so fast and hard. Pope was right. Make him think I'm not his. Sure, this was only the first round. Jesus! What would happen with the second and third and fourth rounds? Oh, this was going to be fun. Maybe I should ask Pope for a little help. He could get Cath out of the deal and lure her away from Baz. **"Rabbit, 1. Baz, 0."**


	8. Shattered Glass - Chapter Seven

I haven't spoken to Baz since earlier today. We've seen each other, yeah, but every time I make eye contact with him, he looks away or he ignores me. And of course I know why. He's pissed at me for giving him blue balls in the garage this morning. If he thinks I care, then he's a dumb mutha' fucka', ain't he? Ever since Smurf adopted me, I've been running my ass behind Baz. Throwing myself at him. Literately offering myself to him on a silver fucking platter. He denied me each and every time because of Cath. Because of some bullshit loyalty to her. He may love her, but he's not in love with her. Any idiot can see that. And any idiot can see he feels a certain type of way about me.

Well, I wanted to let him know how that shit feels. How it feels to want something and to have it, but to be denied it. I let him taste my pussy. He was loving it too. The moans and groans that were coming from his fine ass were enough to make me come all over that handsome face of his. I almost did, too. God, he's so fucking skilled with that tongue of his. His mouth, as a whole, had me creaming all over that car. I was totally ready to come. I wanted to scream his name at the top of my lungs. I wanted my brothers and my mother to know that Baz was making my little pussy come and come so good.

I wanted fucking Cath to hear it all way where she was. At work, at Crystal's…wherever the fuck she spends her time. Don't know. Don't care. But I wanted her to hear me. I wanted her to hear Baz tongue fucking my pussy and tearing it up good, might I add.

But I had to stop him, as much as I didn't want to do it. I know. How stupid was I? I had him where I've always wanted him and he was going to give it to me. Hell, I bet if I let him taste my come, I wouldn't have had to beg to feel his dick inside me. He would have fucked me right then and there.

I had to muster up every ounce of strength inside of me, however to stop him. While he was sucking my clit, I realized I had to be stronger than that. All these years, I've been willing to just hand my cherry over to him.

Not anymore.

He wants me, he's going to have to work hard for me. So, for now, he can fuck Cath and pretend she's me. But he won't get the real thing until he makes some changes. He can fuck her moonpie-no-having-ass all he fucking wants to. Maybe I should stop talking about her flat…her ass. She's not worth it so no more mean comments or thought about Cath…

' _Yeah-fucking-right.'_

" **Who is this again?"** We pulled up to an apartment complex. I recognized it, of course, from passing by it every once in a while, but I've never actually been inside an apartment there.

Smurf put the car in park and turned off the engine. **"Let me ask ya' something baby. Be honest with mama."**

" **Yes ma'am."**

" **How is Pope doing?"**

I let out a heavy sigh, blowing through my lips like I was blowing a raspberry or something. How was Pope doing? That was such a hard fucking question to answer. " **He's…he's better than I thought he'd be** ," I said honestly. **"I know he's angry about how it all went down. I know he's angry that you didn't visit him like you should have. I went every week, while the rest of you went whenever you thought about it. I didn't know him well back then, but that didn't matter. When you said that you were adopting me that meant the boys were to be my brothers. And blood or no blood, Pope was my brother. Him being in jail was actually how we got to know each other. He didn't have anywhere to go, so he had no choice but to get to know me."** I turned my head and looked at her. I knew what she was wanting to hear. Might as well quit stalling. **"He's not doing okay. He's not sleeping. I've caught him wandering around the house. And if he's not doing that or staring at the television—sometimes it's not even on—then he's outside, naked, staring up at the sky."**

" **Shit,"** she cursed, yanking off her shades. **"I knew it! Fuck."** She shook her head and ran a hand through her hair.

" **Give him a break, Ma. He had it rough on the inside and—"** I snapped my mouth shut when her eyes snapped to mine. **"Nevermind."**

" **No. What? What? What happened?!"**

I sighed again. I wasn't going to tell her. Pope made me promise. I had said too much already when I mentioned him having it rough. **"Don't worry 'bout it. Just know that it might be a while before he's normal."** She gave me a look. **"I mean…Pope-normal. I mean…you know what mean! Oh, hey, you know J's girlfriend, Nicky lives in the Meadow Brook subdivision?"**

" **Meadow Brook,"** she raised a brow. **"You gotta be shitting me. Another one?"**

I laughed. Meadow Brook was a suburban neighborhood. People who lived there wouldn't be caught dead with trash like us. And honestly, we hated those kind of people. Every last one of those jerk-offs had sticks up their asses. There was only one person who was an exception. And I missed the shit out of her.

" **Have you seen her around? How is she doing?"**

I shrugged sadly. **"I don't know. She stopped returning my phone calls and texts. Eventually, she changed her number. I asked Craig. He hasn't seen Sasha either. It's been a year. I'm surprised he's held up this long."** Though, it was why he started doing so much blow within the last year. He was trying his best to get over her, but no matter how much of that shit he snorted up his nose, he wasn't going to forget her. He had plenty of chicks before, but Sasha Elizabeth Kyle was Craig Michael Cody's first and only true love. Looking at the two, one would have to wonder why she would be with a guy like him. She came from a clean-cut, conservative family. Bible Thumpers too, meaning no sex before marriage. That changed for her when she met Craig. She fell in love with him and of course, he was her first. She gave caution to the wind when she was with him.

In my opinion, he allowed her to be herself. Allowed her to enjoy life, whereas her parents stifled it. She and I used to have long talks about any and everything. She was one of the only people that knew about my past and why I ran away. We all loved her, despite her upbringing and her family (who hated the shit out of us). We even loved her more than Catherine. Sasha was like a big sister to me. Hell, she became my sister when she and Craig got married in Solvang during family vacation. They actually snuck off that night, but Smurf knew what was going on and we ended up beating them to the Chapel and attended the ceremony. I was Sasha's Maid of Honor. Deran was Craig's Best Man. Didn't take no more than fifteen minutes, but it was beautiful nonetheless. I miss her.

I want my sister back. I'd gladly take her a hundred times over than No-ass-having Catherine. At least Sasha had an ass. A _great_ one, might I add.

" **Okay, so why the hell are we here?"** I asked again.

" **Pope needs medication, but you know as well as I do that he's not going to take it."**

I snorted and rolled my eyes. **"Duh. Remember what happened the last time you suggestion he get back on his pills?"** I chuckled. **"Okay, so why are we here?"**

" **Like I said, Pope needs medication."** She got out of the car and I followed. **"Gimme your shoe."**

Furrowing my brows, I pulled my foot up and reached down and pulled off my right silver studded Gucci pump. I didn't have many Gucci pumps. I preferred casual shoes like Chuck Taylors, but when I wanted to feel sexy, I opted for pumps. And the Guccis went well with my high waisted skinny jeans and my red, laced bralette. I watched as she took my shoe and banged it against the side step that led up to the complex. I gasped and let my mouth drop open. **"You owe me another pair! What the hell was that for?!"**

" **We need to get upstairs and score some pills. I know from who, but he won't just let us in. We need to make it look like you fell down or something."**

I nodded my head, realizing where she was getting at. But she didn't have to like…murder my fucking shoe like that. My braids were pinned up on top of my head in a huge-ass bun. I pulled at it until half of it was crumbling down. Kind of felt good. My braids were long and when piled on top of my head, they could be heavy and sometimes made my head hurt. Leaning over, I scratched my palms against the side step until they started to bleed. I hissed and clenched my teeth at the pain and then smeared my mascara. I looked over at my mother, who did the same for herself, though I see she didn't murder her shoes. I wasn't letting that shit go. Pope bought me these shoes, so I was going to be thinking about this shit the whole way back home.

" **Have I told you how hot you look today?"**

" **You know I'm pissed at you for what you did to my shoe, so now you're sucking up,"** I told Smurf.

" **No. Actually, I was telling you how hot you look because you're gonna have to use that when we get upstairs."**

She started up, but I stopped the both of us and stared at her. She didn't know because I never told her. Pope and Sasha were the only two who knew. **"I know you didn't mean any harm in that, but don't ever manipulate me to use my looks or my body to get what I want from men. Got it?"** She was taken back by my words and the bark behind them. **"If you need me to do something, just fucking ask. But don't fucking tell me I'm beautiful or hot or sexy because you think that's gonna get me to do shit for you. Okay?"**

She blinked back the confusion. **"Y-Yes. Of course baby."** She stared at me, trying to find the answers she was looking for behind my eyes. She couldn't. My wall was up right now. I didn't want her to see shit. **"Boo…"** It was her special nickname for me. **"I know you don't like to talk about your past or your mom, but…** _ **I'm**_ **your mother now. You hear me?"** She narrowed her eyes. **"I want you to** _ **trust**_ **me not because I** _ **tell**_ **you to or because I practically** _ **beg**_ **you to, but because I want you to** _ **feel**_ **like you** _ **can**_ **."**

I saw the longing in her eyes. Her relationship with her own daughter was fucked and now she's dead. I knew I was her last hope in having a daughter who she could be a mother to. And I wanted that. Smurf was my only chance at having a mother. But that bitch fucked my mind up so bad that I couldn't even trust the people who I knew loved me. **"I thought I could trust her. I should've been able to trust her. The lady gave birth to me. In the end, I couldn't. She screwed me more than a pornstar."**

" **What happened in that house, Boo?"**

My eyes lifted to hers. Even in my heels, I still had to look up at her when she wore heels. **"Whatever happened, I not gonna tell you while standing in front of the apartment of the person we're about to go and get pills from for Pope. If I ever tell ya', I gotta know that I can trust ya', Smurf."**

" **You don't trust me now? Have I ever given you a reason not to trust me? Rabbit, please. I'm your mama. It doesn't matter that you didn't come out of my cunt. You are** _ **my**_ **daughter, you got me? And if that bitch was standing in front of me right now, I'd let her know just how much you belong in this family. I know your brothers feel the same way."** My head lowered and so did my eyes to the sidewalk. She didn't show this side much, but she was letting me know that she loved me. Somebody loved me and I didn't have to use my body for it. She lifted my chin so that I met her gaze.

" **J feels that way, too. You know I think he has a little crush on you."**

I laughed. **"Ha! Yeah right. Besides, he's a teenager. He's gonna have a crush on whatever has two tits and a cat."** Rolling my eyes, I climbed the stairs behind her.

" **Still, he likes you and I want you to try him out. See if we can trust him completely. With that dead cop, he's gonna see things that I wasn't prepared for him to see yet. I wanna know if he can keep his mouth shut."** We stopped at a door and she turned and looked at me. **"You trust him."**

It wasn't a question. **"I trust him. Think about the shit he's seen with Julia. I know he can keep his mouth shut about the drugs. The other shit? Maybe. Pope can get him to keep quiet if need be."**

" **That's what I'm afraid of,"** Smurf mumbled, before banging on the door.

Curiosity got the best of me because I wanted so badly to know who was on the other side of the door. Smuf was a colorful woman with an even colorful past. There was no telling who the hell was about to open this door. Shit, it could be Kim Kardashian. Nah…not Kim Kardashian. Maybe Rob and that Blac Chyna, but not Kim. The door opened and up walked….wait…some hairy, fat guy?

" **Oh! Jonah! Thank God you're here."** Smurf put on the dramatics. **"I'm so sorry to bother you, but look…."** She held her hands up and stepped back so that he could see her ruffled clothes. **"We had a little accident."** She gave him an easy going laugh. He looked at her as if he didn't know her, but the more she spoke, the less confused he became. It was as if she had him under a spell. That's my mama. She was a fucking boss. He looked at me a little longer than I wanted him too. Smurf stopped talking and cocked her head to the side. **"Oh, this is Maddie. My daughter. You remember her don't you?"** She didn't wait for an answer. **"Anyway, we're late for a meeting in Del Mar and we don't wanna go looking like shit! I locked my keys inside the apartment and Maddie's boyfriend has her keys because he has her car and our maid won't be here until later. Our day is beginning to look like hell!"** She laughed. **"Can we just get cleaned up?"**

He looked over my way again. His eyes dropping to my breasts. I pushed them out a bit and cleared my throat. When he looked into my eyes, I gave him a sexy lopsided grin and leaned against the door frame, my hand resting above my head. **"We won't be long. Please, Jonah? We wouldn't be asking if it wasn't urgent."** I bit down on my full lip and then wet it with my tongue. I knew how it looked in that very moment. Baz always said my lips looked sexy when wet, so I knew I had him because that's exactly where he was now staring.

He didn't even notice Smurf walking in passed him. I walked in too and closed the door behind me. He chuckled nervously and rubbed his beard. **"Um…forgive me, but…do I know you two?"**

I blinked and snorted. **"We stay a few doors from you Jonah. The Lamberts? Lynne and Maddie Lambert?"** There it was again. That confusion, but the more I spoke, the more it was as if he recognized me. **"Right! I'm sorry. I…where are my manners? You wanna have a seat? You want something to drink?"**

I declined the drink, but took him up on his offer and sat down across from him on his couch. I crossed my legs slowly and leaned back a little bit, making myself comfortable. I was only 5"2, but I knew in certain positions and angles (and in certain shoes), my legs could look long. I had great legs anyway, so no matter them being long or short, he was going to look at them. I held up my shoe. **"I think I'm more upset about my shoe than anything else."**

" **I actually know a guy who can fix that. I-If you want me to g-give you his number."**

" **Really?** **Oh that would be great! How about I take your number, hm? I can maybe give you a call? You can uh, give me all his details."** I let my toe run up and down his leg. From where I was sitting, I could see his blush and noticed he started to sweat. Suddenly, there was a noise in the bathroom like something had knocked over. Jesus, Smurf. Jonah had turned and looked back, but I quickly jumped up and turned his attention back to me by sitting in his lap. **"You live here by yourself, Jonah?"**

He blinked and swallowed hard. **"Uh, by myself? Uh, n-no. My best friend, Ray lives here with me. A-And his girlfriend just moved in."**

" **Ooooh. Girlfriend, huh? And do you have a girlfriend, Jonah?** " My finger started to trace imaginary figure eights on his chest.

" **No. I mean, I mean, I uh, I had one, but we're done. Over."**

" **Ah. And do you and Ray and his girlfriend have fun together?"**

He shrugged. **"She likes to watch chick flicks every Friday night so, I don't know about—"**

" **No, I meant do you like to watch them fuck, Jonah? Do they let you watch? I would let you watch. Then again, I wouldn't need my boyfriend to be present."** I giggled and then fanned myself. **"Whew! It's getting hot in here, right? I think I would take that drink now." I stood up so that he could stand, but I didn't sit back down. While he was getting me a drink, I was browsing around his living room, glancing back towards the bathroom. Did Smurf had to take a shit or something? Geez. "Why did you and your girlfriend break up?"**

" **She said I wasn't exciting enough. Met someone else. Dumped me for him,"** I heard him say from the kitchen. **"Um…why did you and your boyfriend break up?"**

" **Oh, because he wasn't exciting enough. I haven't met anyone else, though. See, we didn't like the same things. Movies, music, I could look past, but there's one thing that I like that he didn't like. One thing a guy must like in order to get with me."**

" **What's that?"**

He was back in the living room. Turning, he held two beers. At that moment, Smurf rushed out of the bathroom, thanking Jonah. Opening the door, she left. That was my cue to leave too, but not before I left him with a little something to remember me by. I walked to the door and turned to look at him. **"It's simple really,"** I said, shrugging. I could have barfed right there. I ever understood anal sex and do not see myself doing it in the future **"I liked to be fucked in the ass."**

He dropped both beer bottles. I laughed when they shattered everywhere on the floor at his feet. Waving my fingers, I walked out and shut the door behind me.

* * *

When we got back home, I had changed out of my clothes and into something more comfortable. I was still pouting about my shoe, but it was for the sake of Pope. That eased the pain a little bit. I'd been sitting on the counter in the kitchen for about an hour, watching him, while Ma' cooked. He was still going at the damned grill full force, as if he never grew tired. I had taken him a bottle of water and a beer to wet his tongue. Tried to talk to him a little bit. He was really talking today so I knew something was weighing heavily on his mind. I would eventually find out. He would open up to me, but I had to be patient.

Baz walked in and chuckled at Smurf. I didn't bother looking at him because I knew he was going to ignore me.

Or at least try his best to.

I didn't have on my shorts in that moments. Yep, I actually wore clothes so maybe he would ignore me. He only paid attention to me when I was half naked anyway as sad as it sounds.

 **"Wow,"** he looked down at the pills Smurf was banging up. " **Hope those aren't for me."**

She gave him a look. **"You know who these are for. He's been like that since before we left and he's still like that."**

Baz turned, with his beer and watched Pope. **"Wonder what's on his mind."**

 **"Nobody knows. Except Rabbit, but she's not telling me."**

That last part was said overly loud for effect for me. This time, I didn't know what was on his mind and it was bugging the hell out of me. Patience was a virtue I had to keep telling myself. But how could I help him if he didn't tell me what was wrong?

 **"You think these are gonna help?"** Baz asked.

 **"After what we went through to get them."** She looked at Baz. **"We had to improvise a little bit. I could only imagine what Rabbit had to do to keep his attention so that I could get them. Did you have to actually touch him, baby?"**

I shrugged. **"He wasn't that bad. Not a bad looking guy either. Kind of sweet lookin'. Girlfriend left him for another guy. Kind'a felt bad for him. Gave me his number. Maybe I'll call him and get a date."** I opened my mouth as if gasping like I was excited.

 **"Ah. So you two stole them."** Baz nodded.

Smurf looked at him, stopping what she was doing. **"The things you and I have done so your brothers and sister wouldn't have had to." She chuckled. "I remember when I took you in. Ugh. You used to steal food out of the fridge and hide it around the house."** My eyes fell upon her. She moved to stand in front of him. **"It took about a year for me to make you understand that I was going to feed you regularly."** She basically reminding him what she's done for him and the fact that she would do it again all over if she had to. She reminded him of what they had to do so Craig and Deran didn't have to get their younger hands dirty. Baz was judging. Smurf was telling him, in her own way, not to judge. She really was a pro at this. When I first joined the family, I realized just how tight she had the boys wound around her finger. So tight, I was surprised her finger didn't turn purple and pop off. **"Your parents were such shits,"** she whispered, before kissing his forehead. **"I will do anything for you Barry. All my children. I just wished my children would trust me."** She looked over at me.

I sighed to myself. Here it comes…

 **"We do trust you, Smurf. After all you've done for us, how could we not trust you?"**

 **"Rabbit doesn't,"** she turned and went back to preparing the food.

Baz made a sound and chuckled. **"Yeah. Same shit, different day with her."**

Ah. So he was going to ignore me _and_ talk about me like I wasn't there. Well, at least he wasn't talking about me behind my back. I guess he thought I was stupid enough to not know what he was doing.

That was him trying to get a reaction out of me.

This was me walking away.

Pushing myself off the counter, I hopped down and grabbed another beer from the fridge, before I left the two in the kitchen. I wasn't about to get into this conversation with Smurf again. Certainly not with Barry standing there being an ass. I trusted her, but I held her at a certain distance because if she ever fucked me over, it wouldn't hurt that much. I did that to everyone. Even Pope. Even Baz. Especially Baz. With Cath in the picture, there was no way I was getting my heart hurt by him. That had happened before with… _Him_. My ex to be exact. I told myself I would never let that happen again.

And I meant what I said when I told Baz that my pussy wasn't his anymore. As long as he was with Cath, he wasn't allowed to toy with me the way he wanted to. Him eating me on the hood of Smurf's car was another example of him thinking he could have me whenever he wanted to. I would have thought it meant something more and try to get closer to him. He would do to me what he's always done: pushed me away.

No more of that shit.

Nada.

I walked in the family room and plopped down on the couch. Craig, Deran and J had just gotten back in taken down the getaway. Craig didn't look so hot, but he was snorting. Usually, I'd give him shit about it, but I figured he needed it after today. He sniffled and wiped at his nose.

 **"You want some baby sis?"**

It seemed like minutes before I answered him. **"Yeah."** I glanced at his surprised look. I'd done this a few times before, but it really wasn't my thing. I deserve this high today. I needed it. Bad. Getting on my knees, I took one of the rolled up hundred dollar bills and put it to my nose. Leaning down, I sniffed up one of the pristine lines. Jerking up, I breathed in deeply and exhaled, letting the shit go straight to my head and wash all over me.

 **"Rough day?"** Deran watched me, while he worked on his joint.

I snorted and rolled my eyes. **"Rough life,"** I muttered, watching Craig get up and walk out. He didn't say how much I could have, so I decided to make myself comfortable and take another line.

 **"Baz and Smurf left extra early this morning."**

I shook my head at Deran. **"Yeah. They got back and Smurf woke me up. Wanted me to go with her to get some shit for Pope. Meds that'll even him out. Hopefully relax him. Ya' can't say shit about it though Deran. Not even when you're mad and you're thinking you're getting back at him by saying that, okay? Keep that shit to yourself."**

He nodded. **"I ain't saying shit. Trust me. I remember what happened last time. It was right before he went to prison. Right before we met you. He got so upset that he tried to set the garage of fire."**

I nodded. **"I remember."** Or I remember at least the stories that were told to me. That's how a lot of that shit was. They told me a lot of stories and told them to me often that it felt like I was here when it happened. There were a lot of times I forgot that I wasn't born into this family. Then I would look into the mirror and see my mom staring back at me and remember her disgusting blood runs through my veins.

Sitting back, I sighed and closed my eyes. Letting this shit take over me. I hadn't gotten high like this in a while. In this moment, I see why Craig did this shit like he needed air to breathe. I was starting to feel relax. Starting to feel…everything actually. My mind became more opened and I became more aware of everything. I looked at Deran, who was smiling at me and I laughed. **"What?"**

He shrugged and shook his head. **"Nothing. I just like seeing ya' like this. Relaxed. Happy. Ya' must've really had a bad day. Did ya' go with Smurf and Baz?"**

I shook my head. **"Nah. But I know where they went. To get rid of those watches."**

Deran whistled. **"That's so fucked up. All we had to do was just lay low for a little while and then push'em. We didn't have to get rid of them like that. All that hard work we did and for what? For nothing. We shouldn't have done that shit in the first place."**

 **"Agreed."** I was about to pull my legs up under me and lay back, but I heard something. At first, I thought it was the shit I just snorted, but no. This was…this was real. **"What…what the fuck is that?"** Getting up, I sniffed and wiped at my nose, while walking out of the family room. I made my way to the kitchen, with Deran on my heels. We walked outside and around the house to the garage. The sound was clearer now; sounding like someone groaning or dying or something. Deran made it to the door and opened it before I did, but I pushed myself passed him and stopped mid-step.

There, in front of us was Craig sitting at the work desk. I wiped at my eyes, wanting to make sure I was seeing what I was seeing. Was he…was he sucking on his own blood?! **"CRAIG! What the fuck are you doing?!"** Pushing a shocked Deran out of the way, I rushed to the door and yelled, **"MA! MA COME QUICK! IT'S CRAIG!"**

* * *

We fucking flew our asses to Tijuana, coming to a skidding halt. I hoped out the back seat, opening the front passenger door for Craig. It was just me and Baz with him. No one else needed to come. Baz tried to get me to stay home, but there was no way I was not coming with Craig.

He put his arm around me. He was way taller than I am and of course, I couldn't hold him up if I needed to, but I tried to do as much as I could. Craig was pale and he had stopped talking and making any kind of sense an hour before we made it. To the naked eye, it looked like a little flea market. But we knew in the back and up the stairs was Carlos and his crew, who specialized in shit like this. He would be able to get the bullet out, along with the proper anesthesia. No questions asked. No cops. No big-ass hospital bill. I held my tears in for as long as I could, but when they put Craig on the stretcher, they fell down my cheeks like waterfalls. I followed him up to the room, but Diego told me to step out.

 **"Come on, Rabbit. We got this. He'll be okay. Promise. Wait outside. You don't need to see this."**

I hesitated at first, but after sighing, I gave up and nodded my head. **"Okay. I want him alive, Diego."** I looked at him and he gave me an encouraging smile and nodded his head. Turning, I walked out; wiping at my face. As much as I hated Baz in that moment, I needed him. I needed him bad.

I walked through a display of piñatas when I found him. I smiled, before walking towards him. But when I saw a girl clutch him and kiss him, I stopped.

My mouth dropped to the floor and so did my heart. Baz had a girlfriend? So…Baz was cheating on his girlfriend with his….girlfriend? I wasn't jumping to conclusions. I wasn't that high anymore. I knew what I was seeing and the way she kissed and hugged him…the way he held onto her like she was his life support…I knew what she was to him.

I felt my anger rise inside of me. From the tips of my toes and to the top of my head. But that anger was mixed with hurt. A type of hurt that I had never felt before. How could he do this to me? How could he make me look like a fucking idiot? He needed me? He loved me? No. This didn't look like love. This looked like he was playing me for a fool. A whore.

When he pulled away from her, he saw me and paused. I didn't give him time to react. I held my head up high and walked passed him and this bitch like I didn't give a shit. Sure, it was a lie and the heart don't lie. It wants what it wants, but right now, I wanted nothing to do with Baz.

Ever.


	9. Shattered Glass - Chapter Eight

(Long) A/N: And here we go everyone! My first chapter since a two years ago! I want to thank you guys for being so patient with me. I love, love this story and I want you guys to love it too. I am eager so eager to get to the ending that I almost want to say screw it and just skip to it. LOL. This story will be a series called _**The Shattered Series;**_ Shattered Hearts and Shattered Souls are coming soon. Baz and Rabbit are the main characters, but in coming sequels, other character will get their POV. I've read you guys' suggestions and I will be incorporating some of them (or at least the ones I can't actually remember. my ass is too lazy to go back through the reviews and messages. :-) ). So I wanna give a shout out to those who have stuck with me in the past two years since I've lost my brother and father to cancer and diabetes respectively. I took their deaths harder than expected because both of them died in my arms. I hugged them while they took their last breath. Let me tell you, that is NOT something anybody should have on their shoulders. Both situations are stuck on the brain as if it happened yesterday. Sometimes, when I come in from errands, I go to my parents bedroom to check on my dad only to remember that he's not hear anymore. Then I grieve all over again. It's why I came back. This story is somewhat therapy for me.

Shout out to my Beta Reader, **_JI Bollywood Princess 131_**! Thank you my lovely for helping me get back on track and aware of my story and characters! You've helped me bring Rabbit back to life and add a little festiveness to her personality. Why not? This is Rabbit after all. Someone mentioned they liked my story before I changed it, I just want to say that regardless of who my Beta Reader is, my past chapters have not changed. It was more or less grammar checks and fillers. The only change is Rabbit not getting kidnapped until a few chapters down the line. Be sure to check out my profile page for some cool links. 1) A ongoing phone album for my original and AK characters. 2) Tumblr pulling you guys into her life. Without fur adieu...

* * *

 **RABBIT**

" **The answer is no, Rabbit."**

Growling, I slammed my hands down on the table. **"Fucking A!"** I was so ready to leave Mexico. Whether Craig was feeling better or not, I was ready to go. Yes, that made me look like a fucking selfish brat, but in that moment, I didn't give a shit. **"Please let me go home. I have to get outta here!"**

Juan stared for what seemed like minutes but it was really only seconds. **"Why?"**

" **What?"** My brows furrowed. Why would he ask me that? That wasn't any of his business. **"Smurf's sick."**

" **Bullshit."**

" **She wants me to take care of the house—"**

"— **bullshit—"**

"— **you know what it's like living with the Cody's—"**

"— **bull…shit—"**

" **ALRIGHT! BAZ KISSED LUCY!"**

It was quiet between us. That was actually minutes, not seconds. He stared at me and I stared straight back at him.

" **You think I didn't know about you two? About him and Lucy? I told her to leave him alone. He has Cath, Lucy, and now you. Cath, I could give a shit. Lucy…she's my sister, but she's strong. You? I wouldn't ever wish this on you. You're too good of a person. You need to find someone else, Rabbit."**

I blinked at him, swallowing hard. His words rang not only in my ears, but my heart and my mind. I loved Baz tremendously. I couldn't not love him, but this was what I had to do. Lucy…..he was with that whore? Her pussy and asshole were the size of a football field. A car could drive up her ass and still have room for a boat to go fishing.

" **I know."**

Sighing, Juan nodded his head. Reaching inside a drawer, he pushed around a few things before grabbing the key to Craig's bike and turned to me. He didn't hand them off at first. **"It's got a few bugs. I was supposed to fix it. It's why he left here. Just hadn't gotten to it."**

I nodded my head. I knew why Craig left it here and not at his regular shop he used to go to back home. To be honest, it was a waste of time having Juan do it. When I drive it home, I was going to take it to the bike shop. Done and over. Reaching over, I snatched the keys from him. **"Take me to it."**

It took another ten minutes to make sure gas was in the bike and I was on the road. I had a makeshift helmet and it looked fucking stupid, but I didn't care. I didn't even have my license with me. I left any type of papers that I may need at home. Juan told me which way to go, though. No cars could take the trail and it was dangerous. Snakes, coyotes…shit like that I might run into, but as long as the gas got me home, I didn't give a shit. I needed to get home fast. Away from Baz. As a matter of fact, I wasn't even going to Ma's. I was going to my own place. No one knew I had it. It wasn't that I didn't trust them. It's because I'm the youngest and a girl. The boys and Smurf didn't want me to live on my own yet, for fear of one of their rivals they were beefing with would find me. I was safe at Smurf's. Protected... but a girl needs her privacy every now and again. It was why I got the studio and why no one knew about it. I didn't want my mother or my brothers camping outside every night.

I felt my phone vibrating yet again in my back pocket. Didn't take a fucking genius to know who it was. An idiot would know it was Baz. And that was exactly what he saw me as if he thought even for a minute that I would answer his call.

" **Fuck you. And your pig of a whore."**

* * *

 **BAZ**

Lucy was riding my dick like it was her last breath. I let her, too, my breaths coming in quickly just as hers were. It was as if I was into it. As if I was there. She had no idea I wasn't. My mind was completely and utterly on Rabbit. I must have called her hundreds of times and she either didn't answer or the call went straight to voicemail. She never did this, not answering my calls.

Fuck, Lucy was going at this dick like she couldn't get enough. Maybe I had too much on my mind, but this was reeking of boredom. A part of me wanted to be out of there. I wasn't even caring who came at that moment. I was hoping she would, so this could be DONE. Luckily, I didn't have to wait long for my wish. My phone vibrated before it rang loud, catching my attention. I reached over to get it, but she slapped my arm away.

" **No!"** She grabbed by face and kissed me harder, sloppier. My arms wrapped around her, but soon I gave her a little nudge. **"Baaaaz…papi, no!"**

" **It might be important, baby."** I reached over for the phone again. I didn't even look at the number. Grabbing the phone, I pushed her to the side and got up. Balancing the phone between my ear and shoulder, I nearly knocked myself over trying to get into my briefs and jeans. **"Rabbit?"** There was silence and then some kind of static. **"BONNIE! Where are you?!"**

" **She's gone."**

I stood stiff before leaving Lucy's room. I went straight through the front door and then outside. **"Where did she go, Juan?"**

" **Back home. Took Bertha and left—"**

" **Wait, wait, wait…you let her go?! On Bertha?!"**

* * *

 **RABBIT**

Sighing, I rolled my eyes and walked to my car. When I pulled up to Brannigan's Motors, I had a nervous laugh and a big sigh. I didn't think I was going to make it, but I was happy that I did. Juan was right, this thing had some fucking wrinkles to get smoothed out. It made perfect sense. Craig was a beast on his bikes, as well as his cars. He would run them to the ground and then fix them up just so that he could do it all over again.

" **Rabbit?"**

Looking over my shoulder, I did a double take before my eyes landed on her.

" **Sasha…"**

Smiling, she rushed over and wrapped her arms around me. I stood there, stunned, but eventually I hugged her back. I used to see her as a sister, but ever since she broke it off with Craig, she distanced herself and stopped talking to us. That shit hurt Craig, even though it was his fault. Hurt the family, too. We didn't take kindly to people coming in and leaving out of our lives. It was why we were so hard at trusting people.

" **What are you doing here?"**

" **Uh, I'm dropping Craig's bike off. Bertha."**

" **Bertha? What's wrong with her?"** Stepping to the side, she walked out of the side door with me following her. Stopping in front of the bike, she observed it. **"Yeah, I can tell what she needs."** She turned back to me and smiled warmly. **"I'm…I'm happy to see you. I've missed you."**

Snorting, I rolled my eyes. **"Missed me so much that you never return my calls? Refuse to see me? Stop talking to me and the fam? Mm-hm. Oh, I can definitely tell how much you've missed me."** She was about to say something, but I chimed in again. **"Craig will be back to pick it up. Do what you need to do."**

" **Wait! D-Do…are you gonna walk home?"**

Just then, J pulled up on his bike. It was early in the morning and I knew he had school, but he was nice enough to come and get me. **"Gotta ride."** Putting up the peace sign with my fingers, I walked to J and hopped on the handle bars. I had called him before daylight this morning and asked him to come and get me. I could've asked Deran or Pope, but I didn't need them inquiring about why I was home and Craig and Barry were still in Mexico.

I directed J to my home away from home. Cute little beach side apartment. It was nowhere near Barry or the rest of the family. Renn was down the way, but she knew not to say shit to my brothers. **"Thanks, Josh. I appreciate it."** Hopping off the handle bars, I turned and stood on my tippy toes to kiss his cheek. **"I owe you one."**

" **Nah. Don't worry about it. Why…why don't you…why didn't you call Pope? Or Deran?"**

" **They don't know about this place... and I'd appreciate it if you don't tell them. Nobody knows I live here. The lease isn't even in my name and I pay cash every couple of months. Everyone thinks my money goes to clothes, which is it does….but I know what to wear and what not to wear to make it look like I have new clothes every month."**

" **Why did you call me?"**

" **Because I trust you."**

His eyes stared deep into mine, before he nodded his head slowly. **"T-thanks. I…I trust you, too."**

I smirked. **"I know, and I know that's big for you. You're still getting to know us and we are not your typical family reunion type family. Listen…I know we can be a little much, but if you ever need to get away, you can come here. I'm sure you'll find a way in. If you can, then you crash here whenever you want."**

" **How would I know where the key is?"**

" **Who said you need a key?"** My brow raised. Leaning in again, I kissed his lips quickly. **"Go to school before you're late. See you later."** Turning, I walked up the breeze way and turned down the sidewalk to where my place was. I knew he was probably watching and he could see it was the fourth apartment down. I pressed the numbered buttons on my door and waited for the beep before turning the knob and entering.

A familiar, fruity smell immediately hit me and all tension left my body. I needed a shower and then my massage chair. I was about to head to my room when there was a knock. I stopped in my tracks. Renn was the only one who would be at my door, but it was too early for her. I smiled when the haze over my brain left. I knew who it was. Opening the door, I smirked.

Josh.

" **Why didn't you come back with Baz and Craig?"**

Moving to the side, I let him in. While I didn't feel like talking about what had happened, I found myself telling him anyway. **"Craig will be fine."** I called him on my way back. He was pissed that I took his bike and left without him and Baz. I didn't tell him why exactly, but I knew he'd know by the time they got back to Cali. **"He was a fucking idiot for doing what he did, but the bleeding was stopped and the infection was taken care of. He got fluids, pain meds. Everything's fine."**

" **That doesn't tell me why you're here without them."**

I gave him a look of 'huh'. As in, he was smarter than he looked. Or that he was becoming more inquisitive and bold. I was liking that. Mhm. A lot. **"Baz and I got in a fight. I'm just tired of being treated like shit. I give everything to this family and it's like sometimes they are all so fucking selfish. Only looking out for themselves. That's not a family."**

" **Then why do you stay here?"**

" **I have nowhere to go. Besides…you think they would let me go?"**

He furrowed his brows. I just noticed he was still wearing his book sack but at my comment, he let it slide down his shoulders and arms, onto the floor. I watched him come around the isle and stood in front of me. He looked taller than normal. He was only 5"8, but he looked like he could tower over Craig. Before I knew it, he wrapped his arms around me. I didn't even think the kid knew what a hug was.

But there he was, in my kitchen, hugging me. I immediately hugged him back. In that moment, I felt like I could trust him more than the boys. In that moment, I felt less and less like an aunt. More like…a friend. A best (italicize best) friend. I knew that term didn't exist, but somehow J was about to change my mind. As silly and childish as it sounded, I just needed a fucking hug. How was it possible that he knew what I needed? It felt like we had known each other for years.

" **You better watch yourself…you might start to like me."** I chuckled softly, digging my nose into his shirt and shoulder. God, he smelled so good.

He didn't say anything for a long time. The next words that came out of his mouth made my heart skip a beat.

" **I-I already do."**

* * *

 **BAZ**

 **"Jesus, Nevins. I'm itchy!"**

" **You need at least eight more hours. You probably should stay the night."**

I stalked into the room, hearing Craig probably trying to talk Nevins into giving him more drugs—pain medication, to be exact. His favorite was Vicodin. **"No can do,"** I said. **"we're leaving. Get up, Craig."**

" **Wait, what? You can't just take him."** Nevins said. **"He needs at least six to eight more hours on the IV."**

" **Well, I don't know what to tell you."** I said, raising my voice a little. **"We gotta go. Now."**

" **What's so fucking important?"** Nevins looked at me with an incredulous expression.

I was about to turn around, when I stopped and looked at Craig. **"Rabbit went AWOL. She took Bertha back to Cali."**

Craig sat up a little quicker than anyone with a gunshot wound to the upper chest should. **"Then we'll take it with…SHE TOOK BERTHA?!"** Swinging his legs over the side of the makeshift bed, he started putting his shoes on **. "Besides, I talked to Marco. He said we can meet him on the beach."**

I shook my head. Did he not just hear me telling him that Rabbit was gone? **"No, no. I'm not doing this with you. I gotta see if Rabbit is okay. We are going home."**

" **I almost just died, dude. Besides, I'm not letting you have all the fun!"**

" **All the fun? Right. Yeah. Okay."**

" **Yeah. Fun. How was Lucy's pussy?"**

I held my hands up. I didn't need this shit right now. Rabbit was probably half way to Cali and it pissed me off that Juan let her leave on Bertha, let alone leave in the first place. He knows I'm overprotective of Rabbit and the fact that she did this shit made my hair stand on end. I know she's pissed at me, but I needed to explain some things to her. **"You think I like sitting around in this bullshit ass motel, worried about you ass—"**

" **If I thought that's where you were sleeping, I might feel sorry for you. You can go back to Cali. I'm going to the beach. I'll see you later. Tell Rabbit I'm kicking her ass when I see her for scaring me."**

I stared at him. Did he just say she scared him? He was sitting there worried about meeting Marco on the beach, yet he was sooo worried about his little sister. I couldn't help but go crazy right now. That bike should not be on the road and Rabbit should not be on it. Craig knew I wasn't going to leave him though. The next thing I knew, I was sitting on the beach with Marco and a few friends and my dumb ass brother with a fucking IV sticking out of his arm. Who the fuck does that shit? Craig Cody. Of course I couldn't just leave my other dumb ass brother Deran out of the picture without giving him an honorable mention. He skydived with a broken leg once. I sighed when Lucy sat on my lap, two beers in hand. I took mine and quickly took a large swig.

" **Your brother's a beast."** Marco said. I nodded and rolled my eyes. **"Hey, maybe we should put a shot of tequila in that IV, homes."**

" **Only one?"** Craig asked and laughed with Marco.

I leaned over. **"Don't encourage him."**

" **I gotta make up for lost times. Baz left me with Nevins holding my dick."**

Laughing, I looked over at my brother **. "What did ya' want me to do? Hold it for you? Sit by your bed? Change your bed pans?"**

And in true Craig fashion, he says, **"Uh, yeah. For starters."** He laughs again.

Marco turned to Craig. **"Hey, you wanna make some money?"**

' _No, Craig. Just say no._ '

" **Hell yeah!"**

' _Oh come on you fucker!'_ **"Craig, just drink your beer."** I looked at Marco, giving him a stern look. **"We don't do that kinda shit anymore. Don't tempt him."**

Marco just stared at me. **"Wow. Baz, the white knight. Goes around saving his brother. My sister."** He shook his head, before a smile came on his face. **"It's cool, bro. Just say no. I respect that."**

The rest of beach time was spent sitting and thinking about Rabbit. When it was over, I couldn't leave fast enough. After getting our things from the motel, I loaded it all in the truck. Craig was in the passenger side zoned out no doubt. Turning and about to get in, Lucy stopped me.

" **Una matraca. When you do a job, you bring your kid back home something."**

Nodding, I took the rattle for Lena. I had to admit, it was sweet of her. After everything I went through in the past few weeks, I sighed it all out, deciding to leave it in Mexico and hopefully returning to Rabbit. By the time we make it back, it should be nightfall. Rabbit will be home. She will have no choice but to talk to me this time. I won't take no for an answer.

Looking at Lucy, I put my arms around her to give her a goodbye hug. She did the same and held me, staring in my eyes. I loved her, but it wasn't until Rabbit caught me kissing her that I realized that while I loved Lucy, I didn't love her like I did Rabbit. But I couldn't deny that she had been there for me through some rough ass times. "Ya te extraṅo."

" **No tienes que decir eso."**

" **It's true, though."** I nodded. **"It's true."** Leaning in, I kissed her numerous times before telling her goodbye.

" **Adios."**

* * *

 **RABBIT**

" **We can clear ten, fifteen grand. Twenty, tops."** I looked at J. He was a smart kid. This job was legit and even though he wasn't in this family long enough to want to put himself into any shit, he knew if he was going to stay with us, he was going to have to work. Smurf's orders for all of us. She didn't want her children mooching off anyone. We all had to work. It just so happens to be illegal. **"You want in?"**

I was looking for him to think about it, but he gave me an answer right away. **"Okay."**

Smiling, I nudged him with my hip and continued licking my ice cream. While we walked down to the local shop, I told him about a deal. The shop Sasha worked at looked like a mom and pop, but from what I heard they were making bank. Sasha was the manager so it made stealing the money from her all the more exciting. Even though I missed her and almost begged her to come back to us when I saw her earlier, I hated her for leaving Craig. But I hated her more for leaving me.

"Good. There's just one thing. We need Pope and Deran. Baz, Craig, Smurf…they won't know, so don't tell them. No matter how much Smurf demands you to tell her everything." She's not stupid, she knows we lie and keep money to ourselves, but it pisses her off. Sometimes she gets greedy and she wants what she didn't work for. That money is ours. Small change, but worth keeping as stashing away for the future. I don't wanna be doing shit like this for the rest of my life.

Turning down my sidewalk, I took another lick but stopped when I noticed something wrong.

" **Somebody's here."**

Who the fuck was it?! Nobody knew about my apartment and it wasn't Renn. She didn't know where my key was or the numerical password to get through my door. As I slowly walked forward, I saw that whoever it was didn't need any of that. The window was opened. Shit! Was I really that fucking mind fucked about Baz that I forgot to lock up everything? That never happened.

" **Somebody broke in."**

Quickly, I tossed my ice cream and stalked up to my hedge. Kicking over the large rock, I started digging through the dirt and got out a lock box. Putting in the four digits, it opened revealing a small 9mm. Making sure it was loaded, I turned the safety off.

" **Whatcha gonna do?"** J said, coming up behind me.

" **It's my property. As an American citizen, I have a right to bare muthafucking arms if someone trespasses on my shit."**

With shaky hands, I put my code in the door. As soon as the green light came on, I turned the knob and pushed my way in. I didn't see anyone at first, but the kitchen light was on and it sounded like somebody was rummaging through my shit. Standing in the living room, with both hands, I pointed my gun at the kitchen entry way **.**

" **This is a 357 magnum. One of the most powerful handguns in the world. It could blow your head off. The only problem is I can't remember whether I shot four rounds or five. Do ya' feel lucky? Well? Do ya? Punk?!"**

The rummaging stopped. Seconds later, I saw a shadow and the culprit appeared.

" **Go ahead, Rabbit. Make my day."**

Blinking, my already light skin just got lighter; I paled. My heart skipped a beat and it felt like I couldn't breathe.

 **"M-Mom?"**

My biological mother, that is.

Mind = Blown.


	10. Shattered Glass - Chapter Nine Part I

**A/N:** Here's Chapter Nine. In a way, it's a filler chapter but I hope it's not too boring. This is basically the start of when bad stuff starts happening to Rabbit. If you've read the original story, then you know what I mean. With the One Shot, I have to go back and edit it a little so that it will flow with the story now. Besides, there are some major mistakes that need to get taken care of anyway.

Moving on, let me say I'm sorry if I offended anyone in a review I made. Wasn't trying to attack anybody. I was just stating my opinion like everybody else.

Also, I'll stop talking about my life. When I do, it's therapeutic for me, but I understand that nobody cares so yeah, I'll stop. I'm sorry about that guys. :-). Lastly, I'm not mad or anything, but I was wondering if anyone wants me to keep doing with the story. I'm not getting anything from anyone. It's been ghost around this story lately. I love what's coming up next in the coming chapters and sequels and I know you guys will too. If anyone is still interested, please let's keep the reviews. Otherwise, I'll just go ahead and stop and delete the story.

Neffie.

* * *

 **CHAPTER NINE PART I**

 **"M-Mom?"**

There she stood, in all her narcissistic glory. I hadn't heard from her since I ran away. I've done that before and somehow she always found a way to contact me. When I left, she didn't call so I figured that was that. It was the end and our relationship severed.

But now this whore was standing in front of me. **"What do you want?"**

She stepped forward with that sickening fake smile that I wanted to slap the fuck off. **"To see you, of course. I wanted to know how my Jack Rabbit is doing."**

How I was doing? How I was doing?! **"I'm doing just fine, Ginell."**

" **Oh, it looks it,"** she said. She continued to walk around the living room, just looking and nodding her head. **"I've already been to the bedrooms. Nicely done. You are definitely Trix and Bunny's sister aren't ya'?"** She turned back, her eyes going back and forth between me and J. **"I was about to ask who your pimp was because there is no way you'd be able to buy this place on your own. Figures. I understand though."**

Her talking about my sisters made my blood boil. In order to get away from her, my sisters and brother and I had to get the fuck out of that trailer park. We all ended up going our separate ways. The sad part is, we only talk to each other when we absolutely had to. At first, we were close and planned to meet back up to be together. Instead, we grew apart and never followed through with getting back together. **"Understand what? THERE IS NOTHING TO UNDERSTAND! Get outta my house!"**

She stalked towards me. I'm only 5"2, so she towered over me even at 5"8 with her signature six inch heeled boots. Her face went from smiling to sneering. **"I think you forgot who you're talking to. I'm your mother."**

" **No.** _ **I'm**_ **her mother."**

I swirled around to see Smurf standing in my doorway. My mouth dropped so wide that a bus could park itself right on in. How the hell did Smurf know… **"Shit…my phone."** There was no secret, she tracks and traces our phones. Why didn't I take the chip out? Fuck you, Baz. You have my mind so messed up that I made a crucial mistake.

" **She's right, though."** Smurf continued. **"You are doing just fine Bonnie. I like it. It's very you."**

Closing my eyes, I was about to apologize when Gin stood next to me. **"I think there's been some misunderstanding. This is my daughter. I birthed her. Who the hell are you?"**

Smurf smirked. **"Like I said….I'm her mother. I answered your question. Now you can answer mine. Who the hell are you to come back into her life?! And now you're trying to call yourself a mother? You weren't there for her just like you weren't there for your other children."**

" **I've always been there!"**

" **Then why did they leave everything they knew just to get away from your ass? Why Rabbit she homeless?!"**

There was an eerie silence in the room. One could hear a canary break wind in Miami. No one said anything and no one moved. My mouth went dry. So did my throat. It was starting to get hot and the walls were caving in. **"What do you want, Gin?"** I asked softly, my eyes facing the floor.

" **Mama needs somewhere to stay."** Gin placed a hand on my shoulder. I closed my eyes. Her touching me made me want to fucking vomit. **"Is your brother here?"**

" **I haven't seen Baller in a little bit."** My voice was raspy and soft. **"Neither Beatrix and Brielle."**

" **But they stop by every so often. They love my pot roast."**

Wow, she lied for me. Well played. I knew what Smurf was doing. She hated my mother and wanted to throw in her face that I saw her as a mother. That would surely make Gin shit a brick. As a matter of fact, it looked like she already dropped one.

" **I don't know you. I don't want to know anything about you, but I can tell you something about myself."** Smurf took my gun from my hands and placed the safety back on. **"Whether you're here to start anew or try to wiggle your way back into my baby's life, that's all on you. But I'm warning you…"** Dropping it in her purse, she walked around and made her way over to Gin, sizing her up. Letting her know that she wasn't impressed. God, I loved that woman. **"She may not be my flesh and blood, but none of that matters. Along with her brother, she has three more and a nephew here."** She nodded towards J. **"And let me tell you something. They are very overprotective and would kill anyone who dares to hurt our Rabbit. You look like a smart woman. I'm sure I don't have to tell you what would happen…say, if a….woman from her past tries to harm her. She's a Cody now. We would kill for one of our own."** I couldn't see, but I just knew Smurf was giving Gin that crazed look of death. That no nonsense stare. It worked because in just a few short seconds, I saw the back of Gin's head retreating to the door.

" **Cody?"** She stopped and turned to all of us. **"I've heard of you Codys. Heard all about ya'll. Manny told me. He told me once he knows you."** That made Smurf visibly stiffen. **"You've confirmed my haunches. You know what? Rabbit may have a sweet, baby's face, but you watch your back. She'll stab you right straight through you heart."**

" **Get out,"** Smurf said with a strange calmness to her voice. **"Now bitch. before I put a bullet through yours."**

* * *

 **BAZ**

Craig and I walked into the familiar home me and my brothers grew up in. We shared a moment with each other. All except one. Sighing, I placed his backpack on the table. While Craig was talking to Pope and Deran, telling them about his experience this time in Mexico, I went straight to Smurf. **"Is Rabbit here?"**

A brow went up. **"Can't you give your mother a hug? C'mere, baby."** Leaning in, she wrapped her arms around me and gave me a kiss on the lips.

I smiled halfheartedly. **"I'm sorry. Just got a lot on my mind."**

" **Mm-hm. I bet. Rabbit is in her room. She's pretty upset. When were you going to tell her?"** Smurf asked me. **"You better tell me what you did to her and why she drove like a bat outta hell to get back here. I'm surprised she wasn't in an accident. I never seen anyone come back from Mex that fast."**

I didn't even know if I could answer the question, but I tried anyway. **"Every time she came to Mexico with us, Lucy was a friend. That's all. I didn't want my little sister to see me with my mistress. She did and left. I couldn't stop her. She was already gone when I found out."**

" **Little sister huh?"** Smurf was quiet. Shit, did she know? We tried not to be so transparent, but I was beginning to believe we were shitty at hiding our relationship. Smurf didn't say a word for a second or two as if she was thinking of something—a plan, anything. **"Do you know she has a place of her own?"**

Now, I was dumbfounded. **"What? Are you…where?"**

" **By Renn. Nice place, too. She took a page out of my book as far as the décor goes. I have to say I'm quite proud of her."** Smurf said, crossing her arms over her chest.

" **Why is she over there?"** I asked, still confused.

" **Why do you think?"** Smurf raised a brow. **"If you would stop fucking around with her, she wouldn't feel like she needs to have a place of her own!"** She hissed.

I understood what she was saying, but at the same time I didn't see what the big deal was that she had her own place. **"It's really not that big of a deal, Smurf. We all have our own places."**

Smurf took one step forward and stared up at me. **"Rabbit is different."**

" **What, like Julia?! Your flesh and blood daughter who hated your fucking guts and got out of here the first sight of money?!"**

" **Yes, like Julia! You fucked her, knocked her up and she shat on her own family because she couldn't deal with your bullshit! Rabbit is my daughter. Mine! Do you hear me?! Mine! I refuse to let you and Gin break her heart over and over!"**

The silence was deafening. I honestly didn't know what to say on both situations. I fucked over Julie so bad that I didn't want anything like that ever happening again. Of course, it did and the person who was really paying for it was Rabbit. And Gin was back in town? When the fuck did this happen? There was too much shit going on right now that I felt like I was about to lose my mind. **"I just wanna talk to her,"** I said softly. **"I gotta apologize."**

Smurf shook her head. **"Too bad. You apologize so much, yet you turn right back around and hurt her. You think I didn't see what you're doing to her? You think your brothers don't see? J? We see it, Barry. Don't. Hurt. My. Baby."** She pressed a finger to my chest while saying the latter.

" **Noted."**

" **Good. Now you and Pope find out why the fuck that cunt is here. Rabbit doesn't go out by herself, you got me?"**

" **Tell her tha—"**

" **We've already had a little talk. She's not happy about it, but she understands. She doesn't like to show it, but that bitch scares the shit out of Rabbit. We're gonna keep my baby safe. Got it?"**

Slowly, I nodded my head. That last part was for me. I could sense it. She wanted me to keep my distance from Rabbit in a way that our relationship will go back to being brother and sister. I didn't know if I could do that. After Rabbit caught me kissing Lucy, I finally realized that even though I cared for Lucy, she wasn't Rabbit. She just…wasn't her.

" **Okay,"** I said softly.

* * *

 **RABBIT**

The next day, I got up rather late. Didn't eat breakfast and didn't really talk to anyone, but J. He came to my room to visit. He actually used the little passage way between our rooms. He knocked, of course, to make sure I wasn't indisposed. I had taken a shower and changed into my black clothes, opting out my signature red hoodie. I know it's stupid to wear something flashy like that on a job, but that's how good we were. I could have fucking Christmas lights on and the Pigs still wouldn't be able to catch up. Yeah, we're on the radar, but we're basically riding the fence. There isn't anything right now that would tie us to any crime. Except that one time with Pope, but that was Baz's fault.

Walking out of my room, I quietly walked down the hall, leaning on the wall. Smurf had just finished talking to Baz, Craig, and Deran. Something about going skydiving later on. Craig looked a million times better. I spoke to him late last night, making sure he was okay. He was going to pick up Bertha from the shop and then me to skydiving later one. I agreed. I watched as Baz grabbed his keys and left. Smurf also walked towards the living room. That's when I quietly walked out the back and around to the side of the house where the garage was. Baz had already gone and Pope and J were in the truck.

" **Ready?"** Pope called out to me from the window.

I nodded and rushed to the back and got in next to J. **"Let's go."**

It was a twenty five minute drive to the auto shop. Sasha working there made this shit even better. **"I wish I could see the look on that bitch's face. I know I'm not hurting her. It's not like she owns the damn place but just to know we are going to fuck up a place that I'm guessing means something to her makes me feel good. She fucked up Craig and left me without a sister, the fucking cunt."** I sighed and sat back comfortably. **"Well….at least I'm not bitter."** That made J laugh. Ugh…and it made my heart skip a beat. Looking over at him, I smirk and wink at him. **"You're gonna love today, sweetheart. Guaran-fucking-tee it."**

" **Sasha doesn't work here anymore. Overheard Deran this morning saying how she and Craig banged in the closet and got her fired."** Pope said in his familiar nonchalant voice.

Now I would expect that from Craig, but Sasha? Sex in the closet? **"Wow."** It was all I could say about the matter. Knowing Craig, he probably thought they were back together. He could try to fool us and make us think he didn't care about her, but he had a type that he liked to fuck sometimes. He fucked all races, yes, but sometimes, there were African American girls who looked like Sasha and he gave them more attention than others. I had tried to bring it up, but he would brush the situation off.

" **We're here."** Pope parked the truck in the alley. Seconds later, we were walking down the sidewalk with a dolly and a couple of bags. Pope broke into the door of the fixer upper next to the shop and held it open for us. **"Come on. Come on!"** J locked the door, before we made our way around the place and to the back. **"Here it is. Let's go! Go!"**

I parked the dolly and handed Pope and J sledge hammers. They hammered into the wall, breaking it all down, except for metal beams with wires around them. I handed Pope the electric saw to cut through the metal. **"Don't cut the wires. Might be live."** He did just that. Cut every piece of metal except a vertical beam with a yellow wire running around it. All three of us dipped through the holes and to the other side where Victor, the owner of the shop, kept his safe. J brought the dolly through.

" **Spread out."** Pope said.

Didn't take long for us to find it. I put our bags down, as Pope started to break into the safe. I went straight to the cameras to keep a look out. **"Come on, guys."** I was counting the time down. We were a minute behind schedule. To some, that meant nothing. To us, meant doing time in jail. And for Pope, it would be 15 to 20. I wasn't going to let that happen.

We had been there for a good little bit. I was back and forth watching the cameras to watching Pope take his fucking time. The shop was closed for lunch so we only had a little time to get this shit done. All of a sudden, someone pulled up. My heart dropped in my stomach. **"Shit! Guys? What the fuck is this?!"** I rushed back to Pope, who was still trying to get in the safe. **"You said we would have time! Somebody is coming!"** That didn't stop Pope. He was still trying to break into the damn safe. I looked back at the camera. The guy was literately walking up to the door. Running back, I pulled Pope back. **"We gotta go. Now! Just forget it! I was wrong. It's not going to work out."** I got the plan from a lead. I forgot his name. Some guy who looked like shit. Said he knew Pope. We talked for a minute and even though he weirded me out, the job he proposed was perfect. Of course, because I didn't trust him, I decided to bring this to Pope. He knew who I was talking about and was in it before I even finished the sentence. He decided we should go without the guy and do this ourselves. Now, I see I shouldn't have listened to the prick. We were about to get busted. And that meant Pope was going away for a long time. Grabbing everything, I demanded J help clean up. **"We're leaving. NOW!"**

Getting frustrated, Pope put the safe on the dolly and we rushed back to the opening. We fit perfectly through. But the damn safe didn't. **"Leave it! Pope! Stop!"** He was trying his best to push it through. **"Just fucking leave it! Let's go!"**

J pushed me out of the way and got the saw, cutting the metal and the wire. They both pushed the safe through and we were out of the moments later. Pope sneered at me and I just gave him a dirty look. Fucking dumbass.

Twenty minutes later, we were back at the stash house all of us use for situations like this. Don't take your findings to your house. You take it to a place where you can't be traced. Pope, with a blow torch in his hand, broke into the safe. Opening it, he pulled out a stack of porn and tossed them to my feet. And then a few stacks of cash that he stacked on the floor.

" **That's it? You mean we did this for nothing?! What? We almost got slammed for a measly ten thou?"**

"This was your idea, Rabbit. Whattiya say J? How about you and I split it two ways?"

" **I got the idea from that guy you know! You're the one that gave the green light because you said this was an easy hit!"** My eyes were lit with fire. **"You crazy son of a bitch. If you cut me out, Pope, I swear I'm telling Mom!"**

He looked up at me, before standing slowly. **"What is she gonna do? Put me in time out?"**

I bit the bottom of my lip. I had to or it would be me going off like a mutha. **"I helped just as much as you two did!"**

" **Guys?"** J butted in. **"Let's just split it three ways. She's got a lot on her mind. Why don't you leave her alone?"**

Both Pope and I looked at J like he had lost his damn mind. He didn't say anything after that. He just leaned against the wall, looking at both of us like we were wasting his time.

" **What did you say?"** Pope said, coming out of whatever had the both of us silenced.

" **I said, split it three ways and leave her alone."**

Pope stared at J. **"Well, if you say so J."**

There was no more talking. Just staring. I felt like I should say something. Maybe I was in the wrong. Maybe I should've taken the drill and done what J did. I panicked. I didn't want Pope to get in anymore trouble. Didn't he realize that? My phone started ringing. **"I don't want the money."** I mumbled. It was chump change anyway. Grabbing my hoodie, I left. **"FROM NOW ON, I'M DOING MY OWN FUCKING JOBS!"**

* * *

 **BAZ**

It was later on in the day. I hadn't been to Smurf's because I went to my old man's. He wasn't home. Part of me didn't care, but the other part wanted to know if he was out drinking in a bar, passed out. The latter felt like something he would do. I am expecting a call any minute now from Scrappy to come and pick my drunk dad's ass up and drop him off at that shit hole he calls home. The shit hole I used to call home. Stalking inside Smurf's, I looked around the kitchen and then at her. She was making meatloaf. **"Where's Rabbit?"**

She stopped and stared at me. **"Well, hello to you too, Barry."**

Before I could say anything else, Craig came in with Deran. Smurf put down the meat and wiped her hands before coming around the counter. **"I've been calling you two all day! Where have you been?"**

" **We caught a few big ones. Hey, did you hear what happened this morning?"** Deran came around the island and smelled the seasonings in the raw meat. " **Craig was fucking Sasha in the closet. Got her fired."**

" **What?"** Smurf and I said incredulously.

Craig grabbed an apple and shrugged. **"At least she liked the dick."**

" **At least you liked the pussy,"** Deran said. **"You were moaning so damn much. After all this time, she still got you pussy whipped, yeah?"**

Craig shoved Deran. **"Fuck you! I ain't pussy whipped. I. Whip. Pussy."**

I rolled my eyes, while Smurf walked up to Craig. **"I thought we agreed, Craig. Remember what we agreed to, baby? She's no longer part of the family. An enemy of you is an enemy of me. Of all of us. She can't be trusted. She left you when you needed her!"**

" **It…It wasn't like that!"**

" **Okay, look,"** I said, stepping forward. **"As much as I'd like to watch—and laugh at As Craig's World Turns—I need to find Rabbit. Now, where is she, Smurf?"**

" **Right here."**


	11. Shattered Glass - Chapter Nine Part II

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews and follows guys! I appreciate them. Here is Chapter 9: Part II! We get a snippet of Rabbit's sister in this! Please visit my profile to see the new additions of her sisters and brother! Also, next chapter? SASHA AND CRAIG! Please read and review! Five reviews gets another chapter! Five more reviews gets DOUBLE Chapters!**

 **XOXO - Neffie**

* * *

 **CHAPTER NINE PART II**

 **BAZ**

" **Right here."**

I walked towards her and silently beckoned for us to go to her room and talk. I followed her there and closed the door. **"Before you justifiably rip my ass, I want to apologize to you. I should've told you about Lucy. Bonnie…I'm so sorry. I had a lotta shit going on. Cath and I weren't in a good place. Lucy was there when I needed her. It'd been going on way before I met you."**

She nodded. **"Ok."**

I waited for the coming bitch session. She was going to rim my ass... or at least I thought she was. Instead, she just stared at me. I was half way wishing she'd bitch at me. I deserve it. **"Rabbit? Did you hear what I said? I'm apologizing here."** I wanted her to yell, scream, cry…something. She just stared at me and did absolutely nothing. **"Bonnie…please…"**

" **Goddamn it! What the hell do you want from me right now? I'm- Look, I'm pissed and hurt and quite frankly I'm tired of it. I got a lotta shit on my mind right now! Jesus Quincy Christ, Baz! Ginell's back in town and I wanna say that I have no fucking idea why, but I might have a clue. The fact that I have a clue scares me shitless. If it's why I think it is, then I'm screwed."**

I stepped forward towards her until I was standing in front of her. **"What? What's going on? Talk to me."** Biting her lip, I could tell she was thinking about it. She didn't trust me anymore. I could feel it. Even though that made my heart ache a little, I took the situation for what it was: a fuck up on my part. **"Talk to me."** I literately wanted to beg her. She had no idea how fucked up about this I was feeling. Smurf told me to stay away and not to hurt her anymore, but I couldn't do that. I couldn't not talk to Rabbit and let her know how I feel. And in doing that, I wanted her to confide in me also. Like we used to with each other… **"Rabbit…"**

" **I can't tell you, Barry. Just know that she's a bad person. You know that, but I never told you how bad she is. And her boyfriend. Or husband. I think they're married now. I don't need your help with this. I just need my sisters and brother. I need my family"**

" **I thought we were your family,"** I mentioned. What she said hurt worse than expected. " **I know how you feel about Baller and Beatrix. They're cool, I guess. But Brielle? C'mon, Bonnie. She doesn't give a shit about you. Not like we do."**

She walked to her bed and plopped down on it. Taking out her phone, she searched through a few numbers I was guessing and dialed one of them. **"Beatrix? It's Bonnie. Gin's back."** She put the phone on speaker and held it a few inches from her mouth.

" **What the fuck do you mean she's back?! And hello, by the way. It takes you six months to call me and you don't ask how your big sister is doing?"**

" **I'm sorry. I'm just…still in shock I guess. I called Baller a few minutes ago. He's on his way from Louisiana. He was staying with Uncle Remy. Where's Brielle?"**

" **Probably getting another degree from Harvard. Fuck if I know. Every time I call her, she's busy. Rabbit? What are you going to do? You can't tell her where I am."**

" **You know I won't! I just…she showed up at my place. Broke into it. Asked about Baller and…I don't know where she is. I don't know if Troyas is—"**

" **Don't you dare say his name! He doesn't deserve to have his name uttered, the fucking low life bastard!"** Silence **…"Listen, I'm coming okay? Don't talk to Gin anymore. Whatever you do, those people you're staying with…don't go anywhere without them. Have you…do they know that he—"**

" **Stop, Trix,"** Rabbit looked up at me for the first time in minutes. She never talked about certain things from her past. Whoever this Troyas was…I was going to have to dig a little deep to know who the fuck that was and why Rabbit was visibly shaking with her sister said his name. **"Call me when you get here. And Trix? Hurry up."**

* * *

 **RABBIT**

So, we didn't go skydiving the day before. We had a nice family dinner as always. I helped Smurf with the dishes, while the guys played on the PlayStation in the family room. Smurf and I did talk. She let me know that she wasn't going to let Gin come and fuck up my life like she already had. I knew Smurf, who I see as my real mother, would do whatever she could to protect me. The boys didn't know yet, save for Baz, and I didn't want them to know. Not right now. Pope—even though he and I had a mini fight—he would find Gin himself and try to take care of her. I couldn't risk him getting caught and going away for life and besides…if Troyas was with her…He'd kill Pope without a thought. Then the rest of us if he can find us. He could put a few sources together to try and find me, we all had sources of our own keeping us shy of the radar.

It was the next morning. Pope's birthday. I haven't seen him yet, but I was going to wish him a happy birthday. I was shocked at our fight. We've never fought before. I don't know what crawled up his ass. Maybe it was because he wanted to feel like he was in control but wasn't. That guy…Vic or whatever…did say it was an easy job and it should have been. We should have copped that shit a while ago, but we stayed away because of Sasha. Really because of Craig.

Stretching, I put my oversized Louis V. shades on. I drank all night and did a little weed with Craig. Blow, too. The latter wasn't my thing, but I did it when the time called for it. Ginell breaking into my house playing mommy was the perfect time. It made my skin crawl how she found me. I have always been careful, so the only answer is she followed me. Probably from the beach or something and sat on the info until she wanted to show her fucking fugly face. Fucking whore.

Lazily strolling out of my room, wearing light jean shorts, a white bustier, with the matching oversized crochet top that covered nothing, I walked into the kitchen.

" **Lena?"** I smiled when she ran up to me. **"My Lena-kins!"** I hugged her and picked her up, kissing her cheek. **"Hey, my love. What are you doing here?"** I walked up to Smurf and kissed her lips. **"Morning, Ma."**

" **I saw her at the grocery store with Crystal. She wasn't watching her. She could barely watch her own kids."**

I shook my head. "Ew." Putting Lena down, she ran into the family room and continued coloring and eating her cookies. I walked back to Smurf. **"Are you kidding me? How they let that bitch be a mom is beyond me."**

" **A crackhead is a better mom than Crystal. I caught Lena just roaming around. Now what if I had been some crazed, psycho kidnapper? It would be Elizabeth Smart all over again."**

I shuddered to think about that happening to Lena. Baz would never forgive Crystal and he certainly would never forgive Cath if that happened because she wasn't watching Lena.

" **What do you think you're doing?!"**

I looked up and saw Miss. Flapjack Ass herself. Oh, God. I rolled my eyes and stood next to Smurf. **"And a good morning to you, too, Catherine. You're off work so soon? It's only ten."**

" **Shut the hell up, Bonnie."** Catherine growled.

I didn't miss a beat. **"Right back at ya', cum-bucket."**

" **Lena?"** She walked through the house and to the family room. **"Lena. Come on baby. Come with Mama."** She grabbed Lena's hand and stalked back to the kitchen. **"How dare you kidnap my daughter!"**

" **I didn't kidnap her,"** Smurf said. **"I was shopping for dinner tonight and I saw roaming around."**

" **Crystal was watching her."**

Smurf stood in front of Cath. **"If that were true, then how was I able to get Lena?"**

" **You should celebrate Pope's birthday with us tonight."** I said **. "You and Lena are more than welcome to come. Besides, I hear you used to loooove to celebrate Pope's bday**."

There was a silence. The only thing that could be heard was the clock on the wall ticking. Catherine stared me down like I was the scum of the earth. I loved every second of it. The smirk on my face was gold.

" **Hey hey, ev…"** Baz walked through the sliding door, but stopped. **"Cath? What's going on here? I thought you were at work."**

" **I was. I came to get Lena. Crystal's gonna watch her."**

" **Or not..."** I mumbled.

" **Why don't you stay?"** Baz asked.

" **No. I gotta work, baby."** Turning, she walked to Baz and gave him a little more than a peck on the lips. I could have ripped her eyes out and kicked her no-having ass all over that motherfucking kitchen. This bitch 'bout to see a side of me she doesn't want to see. I didn't know I was walking towards them, until Smurf stopped me; putting her arm around my neck from behind like she was hugging me. Baz and Cath had stopped kissing, with Cath looking back at me. **"I'll see you at home tonight. Call you later, baby."** She let him kiss Lena goodbye before opening the door.

Craig, Deran, and Pope walked in, as she was walking out. Of course—YET AGAIN—all eyes were on Cath; for different reasons of course, but it still pissed me off that she got even the slightest attention. I nearly did a cartwheel when she left. Turning, I looked at Smurf and rolled my eyes. **"Cunt."** I mumbled. An ugly word for such an ugly trick.

I knew Pope knew that something was wrong, because he was giving me a look. **"What was that?"**

Smurf bit into an apple and passed it along to me. I took a bite, crunching loud on it. "Some buuullshit. Anyway! **It's a happy, joyful day for a happy happy birthday."** I smiled and went to Pope. Leaning in, I kissed his cheek. **"Happy Birthday, Andrew."**

" **Thanks... Smurfette."**

I blinked and then a grin spread across my lips. He called me that when we first met. He said I was a little firecracker like Smurf, only tinier. From then on, he called me Smurfette every once in a while. Whatever anger I held for him, it was gone now. **"Love you."**

" **Love you."** He kissed my cheek again. His way of apologizing for the fight.

" **Yeeees, Happy Birthday, bro!"** Craig patted Pope. They all did. Smurf kissed Craig's lips and then Pope's cheek **. "Morning and Happy Birthday, baby."**

" **Paintballing is gonna be so much fun."**

" **Wha-what?"** Pope looked at all of us. **"Paintball?"**

" **Yeah, dude!"** Deran stopped and looked around. **"Where's breakfast?"**

I rolled my eyes and laughed. **"We didn't cook anything. Go in the fridge and get ya' on damn breakfast."**

" **What did you say?"** He narrowed his eyes playfully and pulled at my braids. **"Huh? What did ya' say, ya little minion?"**

" **Stooop!"**

" **Or what?"** Craig said, poking me in the stomach. **"You gonna beat our asses?"**

" **Ya' better believe it. Cash me ousside. How 'bout dat?"**

Baz, who was drinking a bottle of juice, swallowed hard and coughed. **"God, please don't get her started with the internet shit."**

" **Can we get back to the fact that Pope doesn't wanna go paintballing?"** I got away from Craig and Deran and stood next to Baz. **"What are we gonna do then?"**

" **Nothing. I don't wanna celebrate it."** Pope bit into an apple.

" **Oh! Skydiving!"** I did a little dance. Deran nodded and pointed at me.

" **SKYDIVING. Come on, man, we haven't done that in a while. All of us together."**

" **No, no, no!"** Pope shook his head.

" **Yes, yes, yes** ," Craig said. **"Skydiving!"**

Baz smiled. **"Come on, Pope. You gotta do something. You're out. You're not in jail anymore. We don't have to have Rabbit bring you a cake with sugar glass shaped like a file. Do this with us, man."**

" **I still say that was the best fucking cake I made. It would've been better if they didn't dig through it and break my file. Lets do this, Pope."**

Smurf smiled. **"I have to admit. Skydiving sounds like fun. You should go with them, Andrew."**

" **Yeah, jailbird—"**

" **Don't fucking call me that."** Pope looked at Deran and narrowed his eyes.

" **What?"** Deran blinked. **"I just called you—"**

" **I know what you called me."** Pope interrupted. **"Don't call me that again."**

" **Dude, why don't you fucking take the tampon outta your ass and—"**

Pope was on Deran in a minute. Of course, Craig and Baz held them apart. Baz stepped in front of Pope, keeping him from Deran. Craig pulled Pope outside and towards the grill he was building. The 'fight' was over before it even started.

" **Hey! HEY!"** I placed myself in the middle. I mean, what was my little, short ass was gonna do, huh? **"C'mon, it's a happy occasion today!"**

Craig nodded and pointed at Rabbit it an overdramatic fashion. **"Yaaaas. That's that word you like to say right? Yaaaas. Why don't we stop measuring our dicks? Give peace a chance. And let's do some blow. Alright, okay, let's go."** He said that last part as if it was one giant word.

* * *

" **Hey dummy,"** Baz came back with a few beers, placing one in front of Craig and one in front of me. **"Why don't you sip on this for a while. See how you like that, huh?"**

Smirking, I knocked Craig over with my foot while I lit a joint. **"Didn't you get shot like two seconds ago?"** Rolling my eyes, I laughed and winked at Smurf. J walked in and sat down next to me. I took a puff and extended the joint to him. **"Puff, puff, pass bitch."** I chuckled and gave him a wink. Smirking, he took the joint from my slender fingers and did as I told him to. Good. That meant he was finally feeling like part of the family…maybe?

" **Did you see Lucy while you were there?"** Pope asked and then looked at me. Of course Baz didn't do shit, but laugh nervous like a fucking idiot. **"How is she looking these days?"**

" **Wow, okay,"** Baz clapped his hands. **"We need to get you laid. You've been out for like what? Three weeks?"**

Yeah, he changed that subject right quick, fast, and in a hurry.

" **You know that's like way beyond unacceptable, right?"** He shrugged.

Craig made a face like he smelled something nasty, then took another hit. **"Ew. If I had to go three weeks without sex, my dick would shrivel up and turn to ash."**

" **But wouldn't that be dust?"** I asked him mockingly, indicating that his dick wasn't big enough to turn to ash. I was joking of course and laughing as he threw a pillow at me. Craig's dick looked glorious. I would not want him for a first time, not that I was looking at him in that way anyway.

Craig turned to Pope **. "Your dad like a monk or something?"**

" **Nah,"** Deran said. **"I saw his dad earlier. Took a shit on my car and flew away."**

I furrowed my brows. **"I thought Pope's dad was a dolphin?"**

" **Yeah!"** Craig nodded **. "One eye. One fin. Just flopping around. Smurf felt sorry for him and let him knock her up."** Smurf and I both laughed.

" **Craig's was a seagull just flying and shitting everywhere,"** Smurf said. **"Baz's—"**

" **Is a drunk, I know."** Baz shrugged.

" **No, no,"** Smurf shook her head. **"Your dad….your dad was a bull."** She smiled. **"He basically walked around with his dick hanging out. Couldn't keep it in."**

Deran laughed. **"Like father, like son!"** Baz rolled his eyes and I pretended to laugh. That was the fucking God knows truth.

" **I remember J's dad was a mountain lion."** Smurf reached over and cupped his cheek and winked. **"You never knew that. Strong. Pretty coat. Sharp teeth. Could tear the bark off a tree."**

" **Rabbit?"** Smurf placed her arm around me and pulled me into her. I laid my head down on her lap. **"Your dad was the wind. It's why you run so fast; like the wind was beneath your feet." I** smiled and reached up and grabbed her hand. Kissing it, I laid it on my stomach. That was the sweetest thing she'd ever said to me.

" **Come on, come on,"** Deran hopped in his seat. " **What was mine again? Uhhhh…"**

" **A killer whale,"** Smurf said.

Craig lifted his head from doing another line. **"No way his dad was a killer whale and mine was a Goddamned bird!"**

" **Sorry—"**

" **Actually,"** Pope interrupted Smurf. **"Actually Deran's dad was a selfish prick. And short too. He left Smurf two weeks before she gave birth. I had to deliver your ugly ass myself on the gas station floor."** He downed his scotch and stood up. **"Well, I'm gonna go and take a piss before we go skydiving."**

* * *

We were up in the plane and no one was talking. I tried to hold a conversation, but maybe that was just nerves. I used to be terrified of heights. On the scale of one to ten, I was probably at a twenty four. I didn't even like standing on chairs. My ass is short. It's not like I had a long way to fall anyway. Spending a couple of years with the Codys, you learned to get over a lot of shit. Fast.

" **What?"**

Rabbit looked up at Craig and Deran. **"You brought something back from Mexico, didn't you?"** Deran more or less commented than asking a question.

" **What? No!"** Craig denied.

" **What was it? Coke? Meth?"**

Turning his head to look at Deran, Craig bucked his eyes. **"Dude…do I look like I do meth?!"**

Deran nodded his head. **"Ah. So it was coke."**

I blinked and nearly slapped him. **"How much did you clear?"**

Looking at Baz, Craig silently asked him what he was supposed to do. Baz answered instead. **"Eight!"** He yelled over the noisy plane.

Pope shrugged and pointed at me and himself. **"Big deal. We cleared twelve five."**

" **Wait, you guys did a job?!"** Baz looked like he couldn't believe it. He looked at me with a stern face. Fuck, that face was pure Daddy-ish but that was besides the point. **"Nobody told you to go and do a job! Smurf specifically said that! You could have had the fuck cops on our asses for that shit! It's bad enough we got them up our asses now that Pope is back out!"**

Had he lost his damn mind? Did he honestly think I was going to pass up and in and out? Sure it was only twelve five, but that was a hell of a lot more than what the fuck he and Craig pulled. And to make matters worse, Craig probably got high on half of the fucking supply which was what he was fucking using before we came in this bitch. **"Stop being a fucking Whiny Wanda. We did it. It's done. We pulled bank. Get the fuck over it!"**

" **And you were just gonna keep that shit from me?!"**

" **It was legit and easy! Me, Pope, and J pulled it off! We were in and out!"**

Sitting forward, Baz looked as if he was about to come undone. **"Wait the fuck a minute! The kid got a piece?! Are you fucking kidding me?!"**

" **You fucked Lucy and waved that shit in my face! Are** _ **you**_ **kidding** _ **me**_ **?! Did you happen to forget that I was there?! You kissed her right in front of me! It's bad enough I have to get at that flapjack ass baby mama of yours, now I gotta worry about some fucking Mexican drag queen?! Fuck you, fuck her, and fuck that ugly, cheap ass wig that bitch had on tryin' to pass it as 100% Yaki Weave. Looking like a crackhead Gal Gadot knock-off. BITCH PLEASE! Get the fuck outta here with that shit."** I waved his ass off like he was a fly. He knew not to come at me with some bullshit.

" **At least he didn't cut and run!"** Pope eyed me and eyed me hard.

I stared right the fuck back at him and silently dared him to make a fucking move. **"I didn't cut and run you jack-off!"**

" **Oh yeah? I could have sworn that was your little ass running for the Goddamned door like a fucking rat to cheese!"**

" **WHO YOU CALLING A RAT, PIG?!"**

" **Did you know about this?!"** Craig pushed Deran, who pushed him back. **"Why didn't you cut me in?!"**

" **NO, I didn't know! How do you think I feel?! Ya'll did jobs and neither of you cut me in! You're all fucking pussies!"**

Craig stood up quickly and so did Deran, who wasn't going to back down. Craig pushed Deran again, making him land on me. I pushed him off of me and in turn, he mushed my helmet. Now, it was my turn to stand up. **"Do that again and I'll fucking whup your ass bitch!"**

Sure enough, he did it again. Running towards him, I slammed my shoulder into his gut, falling out of the plane and taking him with me. Naturally, I let him go. He was 'ahead' of me by a few feet, but not for long. Pushing my arms to my sides, I glided faster, catching up with him and clinging on to him. It wasn't because I was scared. I wasn't finished whupping that ass. I punched and slapped at him. He blocked me a few times and even slapped and smacked me on my arms, chest and shoulders. We shoved and pulled at each other; both of us telling the other to get off. In the distance, I could hear Craig, Baz and Pope. I guess they jumped out too. I didn't give a damn. I just wanted to kill Deran. **"Get off me!"**

" **You get off me!"**

" **No! You get off me!"**

I was about to kick him when Craig came at me and took me away with him. **"WHOOO! RIDE THE WIND BABY GIRL!"** And I did just that. I rode the wind.


	12. Shattered Glass - Chapter Ten

**A/N: Sasha isn't in this chapter. Sorry for the spoiler. But remember, I owe you guys two chapters so, she will be in the next one promise. Just for a little snippet. She will be established more in the Shattered Glass sequel, Shattered Hearts. There, we will get a lot more character POVs. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER TEN**

 **RABBIT**

The next few days were filled with parties and drinking and of course…a little Mary Jane. I, on the other hand, was deep in the jacuzzi from trying to make the aches of my body from that fight with Deran disappear. The bruising was leaving and obviously he apologized in and out of my ass. It was okay, though. It wasn't the first time we all had some kind of fight and there's no way in hell it would ever be the last. I know a man shouldn't put his hands on a woman but….I was a Cody. We laughed, cried, fussed, and fought. The bottom line was, we all came back together... except me and Barry. His ass was still in the dog house. Hell, the dog pound and if I had my way, I'd neuter the sonuvabitch... well, maybe not that far...

I felt another body get into the water with me. Opening my eyes, I smiled warmly to see it was J. **"Hello, cutie."** I stood up and turned around, the water sliding down the lower half of my body. I made us two Peach Schnapps with pure mango juice on ice. **"The ice kind of waters it down, but are you trying to get drunk?"**

" **No."** he quickly shook his head and reached for the glass. There was a little bit of hesitation, but when I sat down with my glass equally as full, he smiled again and laid back; drinking. It was as if he felt comfortable and not like someone was going to spike his drink. Safe. **"How are you feeling?"**

I shrugged. **"I've been through shit worse than getting in the fight with Deran."** I showed him a few old bruises I had from me and my brother and sisters. I didn't care to show the ones from Gin and… _HIM_. That man.

It was silence between us for a good few minutes before J turned his head and said **"Like what?"**

Raising my head and opening my eyes, I looked at him. **"Like what, huh? I was waiting for you to ask."**

" **Don't the others know about your past?"**

I shook my head. **"Only that I had a shitty life and my mother is the bane of humanity's existence. I told them I was hurt by someone close to me and she let it happen. Smurf came to her own conclusions and so did the boys. It's why she went all Proud Mary on Gin that day… when she broke into my house?"**

" **Tell me more."**

I bit my lip and after moments of thinking about it, I leaned in and whispered to him. It was a minute conversation in a wet whisper—which whispers don't turn wet?—and I sat back in my spot. He looked at me and nodded.

" **You're lying."**

My mouth nearly dropped. Okay, no, it did drop. What the hell? **"Umm…"**

" **Either you're lying or you're not telling me anything. Nothing shitty takes a minute or two to say. It's okay. You don't have to tell me right now."** he said. **"I-I know you had a hard life. S-So did I. But let's….make a deal or sorts."** That when my eyebrow went up. **"I haven't told you shit. When I do, then…you have to tell me."**

" **Ohhhh."** I said, throwing my head back and laughing. **"Oh, Clever Boy. Smart."**

He smiled widely and looked down, playing at nothing with his fingers under the water, his other hand held his drink—now a third full—and then looked at me with on eye open as the sun was shining down in his other. **"I thought you call me 'Sweet Boy'."**

I studied him and at the vulnerable look on his face. Curious, too. **"I do call you Sweet Boy."**

" **Why?"**

" **Because you are, silly."** I rustled his hair, wetting his brown locks. **"You're my Sweet Boy. No one better call you that."**

Laughing, he shook his head. **"I don't think any of the guys would be caught dead calling me Sweet Boy. Or sweet at all."**

" **Hey don't knock that. In the 70's, Marvin Van Peeble made a movie called Sweet Sweetback Badasssss Song. It was the beginning of blaxploitation movies. We'll have to watch it together and I'll teach you all about it. Ahead of its time really if you watch his son, Mario Van Peeble's Badasssssss, about what his dad went through to get the film made."** We both laughed. **"Well anyway, good. That's my nickname for you. No one can call you that, but me. Just like no one calls me Bella. Why do you call me Bella and not Bon or Bon-Bon or some shit like that?"**

He shrugged. **"Because everybody calls you that. Jack, too. I wanted something for myself. Bella."** Biting his lip, he couldn't look at me anymore. Anywhere, but me. **"Because you're beautiful. And finally, I wanted something of mine. It's why I don't call you that in front of everyone."**

Oh-ho. Oh-ho-ho-ho. That made me grin from ear to mutha' fucking ear. God, this Sweet Boy! Ugh. I loved him so much but hated him for making me love him. He truly and deeply had my back. I knew this for a fact. He didn't have to say anything. **"So tell me this: why didn't you go skydiving with us?"**

He gave me a look and shook his head, taking a drink from his glass which was a little under half empty. **"Me? At thousands of feet in the air with my uncles?"**

" **But I would have been there."**

He smiled and laughed from his nose, before chuckling. **"Yeah. I would have loved seeing you skydive. I love watching you surf."**

" **Yeah, well, I wasn't exactly skydiving. I was trying to beat Deran's ass in the air. Think we hit a pigeon or a seagull or something. Ha!"**

He chuckled. **"Yeah….I would have loved to see you knock him down a peg or two."** From there, he started blushing for some reason.

" **Are…are you blushing?"** A brow raised. **"Why are you blushing?!"**

" **Because….nothing. Anyway. I just hung around. Went to Catherine's."**

" **Ew."** I rolled my eyes. My mood immediately changed.

" **Baz said she was sick and I took her something to eat for her and Lena."**

" **Uh-huh."**

" **He wanted me to watch out for Cath."**

I gritted my teeth. **"Ew. Again."**

" **I, uh, I wasn't really watching for her. I was watching for you. If you came over, I would have stopped you if you had wanted to do something. A-And maybe we could have gone somewhere?"**

Awww. Now I was blushing! What he meant to say, he was at Ol' Flapjack's to protect me. Leaning over, I was about to give him a kiss on the cheek, but he turned his face and we kissed. I should have pulled back. He should have pulled back. Did our dumb asses do it? Hell to the fucking naw.

* * *

 **BAZ**

I kept my eye on Rabbit. She was ignoring me the whole two days since the skydiving. It was driving me fucking bananas. Now, she was in a string black and purple two piece and I was about to fucking flash my dick out and take her right there in the jacuzzi. This had nothing to do with sex. I just wanted to be with her. I wanted her to know that she was it for me. Lucy knows now because I called and told her. Catherine knows something is up because I've rarely been home and if I am there, I just want to see Lena. Besides…she probably already knew anyway.

" **Dude, flip the fucking patties yo' and let's get our fucking eatin' on! I wanna fucking eat before the people get here tonight. Duh!"**

Pope rolled his eyes. **"Ah, yes. Another coke filled night on Renn's ass?"**

Craig turned and gave Pope a stupid grin and wide eyes. **"I'm gonna' eat that ass up, do ya hear me! I said do ya' fucking hear me?!"** He slapped Pope on the shoulders and jumped up and down where he stood behind his big bro.

" _ **I'll**_ **do this shit,"** Pope said, taking the spatula from my hand and pushing me over. **"You obviously have no fucking clue as to what you're doing. Besides, Rabbit's got your attention."**

Craig looked at Deran and handed him a beer. **"We cool?"**

" **Yeah. We cool."**

" **Sorry about not telling you. We're all douche bags on that."**

" **Yeah. Yeah you are. But, uh…you okay, though? The other day, look like something was on your mind before we got to the strip club."**

" **Yeah…Renn's in the ER. I mean, she's out now. She was just…ya know, she overdosed."** Craig shrugged his shoulders, looking a little off when he did it.

" **Damn."** Deran said.

* * *

 **RABBIT**

We both pulled back finally and laughed like little shitheads. **"I'm sorr—"**

" **No, it was me. I shouldn't have….I mean, maybe I should have…I mean, I…"**

" **Wanted to."** I laughed. **"Don't be ashamed. I'm kissable. Look at these lips."** I let my tongue grab the straw and placed my lips on it like it was a dick. I drank my peach schnapps and mango. Pulling up, I smacked my lips, while a drop fell from my lower lip to my breasts. He stared at my breasts and then lips and cleared his throat. **"See?"** I laughed. Taking my ring finger, I slid it up the drip of the schnapps and put it to my lips, she the pad of my finger. I still got it. Didn't even have to try hard.

Looking down, biting his lip. He turned and looked at me. **"I…I need to tell you something."**

" **You wanna fuck me? I hear it all the time."**

" **Yes—wait—I….wait, okay let me start over."** He started laughing nervously. **"I need to tell you something about Alexa."**

Nodding my head, I said, **"Okay. What? Wait, the one with no lips? Looks like she smells like cigarette breath and farts?"**

" **Uh…."** He laughed and shook his head. **"Oh, my God. Okay. I…"** He stopped and hesitated but when he looked at me for assurance, he leaned in and whispered in my ear.

Blinking, with my eyes go wide. I pulled back. **"With her? Your teacher?! Alexa the Yuck Mouth?!"** I leaned back in when he did too. Another whispered secret. **"What?! Nicky?! With Craig?!"**

" **Yeah, Nicky told me."** He nodded and sat his drink down, which was all gone now that he copped it back and swallowed all but the ice. **"And that other shit….it just happened. Alexa caught me smoking marijuana last week. Offered my some kind of job for modeling or something. One time thing. Then…I guess I needed someone to talk to. We were in bed together when it was all over. And then….she…"** He cleared his throat. "Rabbit…the other reason why I didn't go skydiving with you guys…it was…" He licked his bottom lip. "It was my mom's birthday. I….I…."

He didn't have to say a thing to me. **"J…no."** Putting my drink down, I grabbed his face. I was fucking pissed at him, but he had been through so fucking much. **"Why didn't you…Shh shhh…love. I'm sorry. I forgot. I'm so sorry. You Sweet Boy. My Sweet Boy."** I leaned in…going in to kiss him. My hands went to his face. I didn't give a shit about Nicky right now. It was only a matter of time before Craig's dick got into her. Julie…her birthday... and we did shit for her.

* * *

 **BAZ**

My bottle dropped from my hands, shattering at my feet. I could hear my bros asking me what was going on, but their voices were going farther away from my ears. I heard nothing. Saw nothing. Nothing but that kiss. That giggle. That whispering bullshit. Now, she was holding the fucker's face like she was about to kiss him again. **"That's it!"** Running through Deran and Craig, I ran around the pool and down to the jacuzzi. Pulling the kid by the neck, I jerked him up from the water and dragged his ass all the way to the other side of the pool. Turning him around and grabbing him by the shoulders, to stand him straight, I laid one slug to his mouth. **"WHAT THE FUCK YOU DOIN', HUH?"** I could hear the others in the back coming after me. **"YOU MESSIN' WITH MY GIRL NOW?!"** I punched him again and again. Rabbit came and jumped on my back, while Craig, Deran and Pope tried to pull me off the kid. Rabbit jumped on me again and as soon as I felt a weight on me, not really recognizing that it was her, I punched the person in the cheek. She fell down and flipped over in the pool. Hearing her scream was the only thing that stopped me. Swirling around, my eyes wild and crazy, I yelled, **"BONNIE!"** Being knocked from the back, I fell down and watched J dive into the water and scoop her up. I was on my feet fast and went to them when he climbed out of the pool, with her in his arms. **"Oh, my God! Bonnie!"** I tried to go to her, but J pushed me away.

" **DON'T YOU FUCKING TOUCH HER!"** He yelled to me in a voice I had yet to hear. She was crying. Smurf came out and ran to us.

" **What the hell happened?! Rabbit? Baby? My baby!"** She made it to us and to Rabbit, who J placed on the ground so that she could get her breath. God…she was already bruising and swelling up. Smurf saw it and screamed. **"What happened to her?!"** She looked at me who was the only one standing. She swatted at my leg and asked again, **"What the fuck happened to her, Barry?!"** Her voice was mean and with warning.

" **HE HIT ME!"** Rabbit screamed, crying herself to death. I knew it wasn't because she was a drama queen or hurt, which she was hurt. I had never raised a hand to her. I promised I'd never hit her or raise any kind of hand to her. Then she looked up at me. **"Y-You said you'd….never HIT ME! You're just l-like m-my m-m-mom!"**

To say that I was like Gin, broke my heart into pieces. More pieces because seeing her kiss J broke it in the first place. **"No! Bonnie, please! I'm sorry! I didn't know it was you!"**

" **YOU HIT ME!"** She tried to get out of J's arms to get at me, but he held her pretty well. I wasn't surprised. She was small, but sometimes, yes, it was hard to hold her back from whomever she was trying to get at.

Picking her up, J started walking towards the door. I opened the sliding door for the both of them. He stopped. His mouth and nose bloody. **"Stay away from her. Or I'll kill you."**

Watching him taking her in killed me to my soul. The way she clung to him. The way Smurf's eyes were wild and beyond angry. **"Get out!. GET OUT!"**

Deran shook his head. **"You shouldn't have done that man."**

Pope was quiet and looked away, while Craig shook his head, condemning me, too. But when I saw Lena and Cath standing by the gate, looking at everything, that's when I felt like pure shit. Like my dad. I never wanted Lena to see this side of me. **"Lena…Daddy is sorry. I didn't mean to hit Auntie Rabbit."** I said softly.

" **No!"** Cath held up a hand. **"I heard everything and we saw everything. Your girl, huh? You're fucking sick, Baz. SICK! It's the same with you and Julia! You're fucking scum!"** Lena started crying. I wanted to go to her, but Cath picked her up and walked out of the gate, not bothering to close it. I felt over. I felt…done.

" **That was some next level bullshit, man."** Craig looked around at the fiasco. **"Am I still gonna get my burger?"**

Smurf stretched out her arm and pointed to the gate. **"GET. OUT. And shut the fuck up Craig!"**

* * *

 **End Notes: Aaaaalright. What did you guys think?**


	13. SHATTERED SERIES SWEEPSTAKES

**SHATTERED SERIES SWEEPS!**

Hey guys it's time for the **_Shattered Series Sweepstakes_**! All you have to do is answer the poll below. One lucky winner will get a Halloween Gift bag! Good luck everyone and make sure to spread the word about my first story in the Shattered Series! If you have a story, no matter what genre, that you want me to read and review, let me know! Remember, your reads, reviews, follows, and favs get my reads, reviews follows, and favs! Love you guys!

 **Neffie XOXO**

 **1) Will Rabbit forgive Baz? If not, why? If so, why?**

 **2) What do you think about J's relationship with Rabbit?**

 **3) What will Smurf's reaction to Sasha be?**


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